What next?

The web for some reason is rife with "What next?" posts on Medium. I reckon some web celeb or entrepreneur kinds would have written his what next post and everyone else would have taken liberal "inspiration" from that post to create their own versions of What next. I dont want to miss out on the "trend." And thus, here is my What next.

So, life has been great so far. The last year was a mixed bag. I made my mistakes, I learnt my lessons, I played all I could and I did some interesting things. Its time I capitalize and go to the next level (wow I sound like a motivational speaker! Damn!).

For me, what next is pretty simple. I will build on top of what I have and take it up from there.

In no particular order (I have three components to how I look at things - work, personal and writing)...

Work
Next is to establish the event management business that got off to a great start in 2015. It is nothing out of the world and there are a million event agencies in the country but it allows me to do some great work, make the clients happy and pay my bills. Next is to get better at it. Next is to create processes that allow me to deliver better work at cheaper cost. Next is to create a team that allows me to expand. Next is to learn things and inculcate in how we work as a team. Next is to find someone who helps me grow faster than I have planned for. Do you think you want to partner up? I am on saurabh.garg@gmail.com.

Next is to create a marketing support services business that my clients (both of them) have been telling me to do. Apparently I am very good at being a marketing support services guy and I need to create an organization around it. Next is to think about it. Next is to find a way to integrate it with the events business.

Next is to continue the chase for that startup business that can change the world. I mean it. Change as in change. Like Uber has changed the way we use public transport. Like AirBnb changed how we holiday. Like Twitter has changed how I meet new people. Like Tinder has brought to surface the fabric of society we are in. Do you have an idea that we could work on together? I am on saurabh.garg@gmail.com.

Personal
Next it to get more social. Meet more people. Learn more. Do more. More more. More. I love it when I am learning. And the best way to learn is to do. I want to do more things. Even if I have to stretch myself thin. I will do so. One life. Next is to do more (rather than merely thinking), chew more (rather than eating more), write more (AND read more).

Next is to find avenues to help more people. Whatever limited understanding I have about myself, I realize that I am happy when I help others. I dont know if its my vanity or my ego or something else. But I am supremely happy when I am helping others. I may not be the best help that they get but I am definitely better than nothing. You may argue against it. But I think there's no harm and doing and then apologizing!

Next is to spend more time with my family and friends. I have ignored them for too long.

Next is to find love. Though I have missed the bus already with my age but I need to find love. For the next 33 years. Or may be more. I recently met someone who is punting that average human lifespan will cross 100 in the next 20 years. By that metric, I still have 67 years to go. Now thats a long long time. Lets come together and do wonderful things together :)

Writing
Next is finish Book2. And get it published. I am not sure if Grapevine will publish it (now that I have missed several deadlines). May be get a literary agent to help me? I dont know. But next for sure is to finish the book in this year quarter. I've got this year to a great start (this is the 4th post in 4 days) and I need to keep the momentum going.

Of course, I've been grounded all these 4 days and hence I've been able to write. Hopefully I'd continue to write even when I am traveling. Next few days should tell.

That's about it. For me, in one line, next is to end the year better than how I started it. What's next for you?

400072 to 400050

About a fortnight back, I moved from 400072 to 400050. And I have mixed emotions about it.

From - 400072
To start with, I am going out of my comfort zone. I lived there for close to three years. Life at Nahar was really awesome. Apart from a REALLY bad experience with a broker (Naveen / Anju Sharma from Good Homes Real Estate - if you are looking for a place in Nahar / Chandivali, please do NOT use their services. They WILL rip you), life was sorted while I was there. In fact, if I had all the money in the world and I had to live in Mumbai, I will not live anywhere else. May be I need to add this to my ever growing list of things to acquire.

Anyhow, thing with Nahar is that its like a cocoon in a big merciless city. It takes some effort to reach there and when you reach, it is so brilliant that you feel as if you've entered a wrap zone and teleported to a new world. Its green. Its quite. Its spacious. Its airy. Its clean. Its everything that you ever want from a place where you'd want to live. In fact, from my place, I could see a hillock and when it rained, I could see waterfalls. Oh, and I had a balcony, which in Mumbai is a blessing.

I could go on and on and on. It was a brilliant place! I will someday go back there.

To - 400050
At Bandra, on the other hand, life would be far tougher. Things will be unfamiliar and I wont be able to nod at people. I will have to find new comforts. I will have to re-create my life around how things are in Bandra.

But, the larger issue is that on a day to day basis, I will bump into people who are far richer, cooler, smarter, ambitious-er, hard-working-er than I. I would look at them and secretly compare myself to their toys and cringe about my inability to get my hands on them. Case in point? After working for almost 10 years after my MBA, I still havent been able to buy a car. And everyone else I know of has a more than two houses, 5 cars for a house that has like 2 and a half members. And since #in2016, I dont want to crib, I shall leave this rant here.

Also Bandra is far from clean. There are nice little pockets that look great. There is that occasional celeb spotting that happens. But on a day to to day basis, its not a place where I would want to live.

However now that I have made a decision to live here, I will have to live with it. And I need to make the most of my time while I here. So... if you live in / around Bandra and would want to catch up for coffee / drinks / something please do let me know. While I have varied interests, I can hold interesting conversations on startups, marketing, branding, poker, travel, writing and self-improvement.

Up for it? I am @saurabh on twitter.

Hits and Misses of 2015

Good, Bad! Hotlinked from here.
We are now officially into the second day of 2016. And its about time I did I am very late for the review of the year gone by. Not the kind of reviews that KRK has made a living with; but the kinds that make you think and reflect and want to fix things.

So here are key hits and misses of the year. In no particular order,

Misses
  • Spent less time at home. Lesser time with my parents. I need to spend more time with them #in2016. None of us is getting any younger anytime and have to make the most of time with them.
  • Got fired. From a freelance gig. I mean, can you beat that? And more than getting fired, I was told that I did not "bring anything to the table." May be I did not. I thought I was giving in everything but it wasn't enough. It sucks to be told that you are not good enough. #sgMS kept telling me that all the time. And then there's this. Anyhow, its a thing of past. And now that I think of it, I think it hurt so much because I took it on my ego I think. Whatever. I think I am over it. All the best to everyone involved!
  • After I quit my full-time job in Feb / Mar, three people from MDI gave me an opportunity to work on (paid) projects for them (or their companies). I promised things to them and they trusted me with briefs and I did not even get back to them. Despite my best intentions and effort I could not create anything for them that was worth their time or expectation. So I chose to hide. And no, in this business, reputation is everything. I can no longer do this. I will apologize to them. Pronto. And apologize to a startup that wanted to hire me but we could not reach a point of agreement.
  • Got an opportunity to write for TV. I did write a few episodes. But got fired! Not fired per se but I was told that what / how I write may not be suitable for TV. The producer and the creative director was really polite about the entire thing. Glad for the opportunity but I should've proved myself. And yes, I will give things another shot. I dont know when though.
  • Moved to Bandra. This is probably the biggest mistake I've made in a long long time. And I cant fix it till September of 2016. Cant do shit about it. Except wait. So I shall wait. Of course I've learned my lessons and I shall try and write a blogpost about it. Soon.
  • Book 2 should've hit the stands in 2015. But I am no where close to even finalizing the manuscript. I can blame it on my perpetual busy life but life is small and you ought to make the most of the time we have. No?
  • Broke heart of this amazing girl that I met on one of these dating apps. I did not intend to. It just happened. Its probably the worst thing I did in 2015. I dont know how to fix it :(. Any tips?
  • Lost money in a casino. At Macau and Singapore. At Macau, on the poker table, it was a mix of bad luck and pathetic play. At Singapore it was plain old stupid bad decision to play Roulette. 

Hits (again in no particular order)
  • I quit my full-time employment with Social Wavelength. They are a brilliant place to work and their brilliance has now been vindicated after the Mirum thing happened. However I had to row my own boat. I parted ways and its been one hell of a ride. The best part to come out of my stint at Social Wavelength was that I made a few friends while I was there. And I hope I will stay friends with them for rest of my life.
  • Initiated a Mastermind group with 8 other amazing people. We met regularly for about 6 months and then, haven't met since Diwali. But the monthly meetings were great learning opportunities. Hope to get them back on track #in2016.
  • Met Raj! Everytime I meet him, I realise how much I love him and in awe of him. May not get an opportunity to meet him again but what the heck - you cant meet your God all the time! 
  • Starting doing events on my own. Thanks to a friend who gave me confidence to be able to take the plunge. And thanks to agony aunt for giving me the opportunity. It was huge considering I did not want to do anything without with my ex-boss. But then he got busy and I got hungry. Rest, as they say, happened! 
  • Two really good friends (with their respective spouses) moved into their respective houses homes. The ones they've bought. Amazing because even though its been ten years since I did my MBA, I cant seem to buy a car and these people have bought houses worth crores.
  • Traveled to Nigeria and Singapore. Two new countries. In terms of the ones I've been to earlier, I made a couple of trips to Hong Kong and one to Macau. It feels as if I have been to more places but cant recall. So may be, those places are not important. Oh, and I have to find more opportunities to travel. I can not grow old and not have traveled!
  • A really good friend, the kinds bros call brother from another mother, got married. Now, from the MML gang, there's just Suds and I left. I reckon, I would be the last to get hitched. Lets see.
  • Met this girl in Delhi for work. I spent about an hour talking about work and all that. If I was not stuck on #sgMS and I was ok moving to Delhi, I would have asked her for shaadi. She has everything that I look for in a girl - talent, ambition, opinion, lust for travel, business sense etc. May be in next life. If PD says no in next life as well.
  • Decided that am done with Goa. I know I dont enjoy alcohol, or sea food, or parties or clubs. I do however like beaches and water and great ambiance. But every trip to Goa is mostly about drunker stupors, incessant eating, loud music and obnoxious taxi drivers. So I have decided that I am not doing anymore trips to Goa with friends. I will go there by myself, for work and with select set of people but I am done with Goa with friends. 
Thats about it for 2015. Pretty cool it was if you ask me. Though I hope I will make 2016 even more amazing. I am committed to take up my net worth to 10x the level it was in 2015. Help me reach there. You know where to reach me!
P.S.: Wrote these without referring to any notes or tweets or photos. The ones I can remember have to be important for me. No?

Notes2Self
  • I think of death often. It sucks that you learn so much and then one fine day you are gone! 
  • Though I want to get over #sgMS, she still is a large part of my life.
  • I am very emotional about what I do.
  • I need to stay in touch with all the people I know. I got a call from Renu Maam (Gravity) and I realized how much I miss these people.

How do I work?

In this long-ish post I talk about how I manage my increasingly complex work life. Thanks to Monica for prompting me to write this. And more importantly for all the follow-up.
 
So, for the context, I do three four things.
  • A, run an events agency; 
  • B, work as a freelance marketing / brand / digital consultant; 
  • C, actively seek start-up ideas. 
  • D, working on my second book (buy the first one here)
On top of these, I have a million active interests.

A small list will be writing (am a published author, working on my next one), travel (if I dont hit the road at least 3 times a month, I get hibbie jibbes) and meeting new people (takes me to weird places like Race Course -- where they denied me entry because I dont wear shoes -- and like five-star hotels -- where they ask me to furnish my credit card before I place an order -- and so on and so forth).

A long list will have things like trying to run a marathon (though I am unfit and fat), learning to play a guitar, create "interesting" experiments (read businesses with whatever limited money I have).

Now, whoever I talk to, they say, I am trying to do a lot. I know I am. And yet I want more. I want to juggle as many balls as I can and yet walk on a tight rope. It's one life. And I want to do it all. And I cant afford to drop any of these balls and I of course dont want to trip over the tight rope and plunge into the bottomless ravine that has an angry mountain river running through it.

Anyhow, I will talk about how I make sense of my day. The prerequisites for being able to read and make sense of this post are...
  1. Familiarity with cloud computing. In one line, cloud computing refers to software and data that "resides" on the Internet (distributed servers). Everything is "on the cloud" and you can manage without a hard disk on your computer. Think of Gmail. You can login to Gmail from anywhere, any computer and your mailbox looks the same. 
  2. #hashtags. If you spend time on twitter, you will know what are hash tags. Simply put, these are textual labels that you can append to any piece of text. Since these labels are often NOT common words, you can search for these labels and identify pieces of texts marked with these labels. Helps in putting things in context. You may use same hashtags (words, not links) across various tools to help you! To me, hashtags are as powerful an idea as sliced bread is.
Then, you will have to read the following pieces
  1. PG's Maker / Manager Schedules. In one line, he says that you need to split your days in two kinds - one where you "make" things and other where you "manage" things. Make is where you get real work done. Manage is when you are on the call and getting others to do things. Of course if you are the CEO kinds, you could be on the manage mode all day long!
  2. Mindmapping. Apparently created popularized by Tony Buzan, the technique allows you to store and retrieve information the way your brain does. This is one of the strongest techniques I know of.
  3. On the 7th day. A day in the week, I dont work at all!
    So the tools I use are
    1. Microsoft Excel (works for me as my todo list / scratch pad)
    2. Evernote (is an extension of my brain)
    3. E.ggtimer.com (helps me track time while I am working)
    4. Workflowy (my long todo list)
    5. Google Calendar (manage time, deadlines, meetings etc)
    6. Toggl (track time while I am working)
    7. iTunes + Headphones (get work done)
    Lemme take each in detail.

    1. Excel.
    So I have this excel workbook that I use as a scratch pad. Everytime I have my computer switched on, I have that sheet on. If I am on a call, I make a new sheet and put notes from the calls there. I used to do it on Evernote (especially the Evernote desktop plugin) but then my Evernote reached a point where I had way too many notes on it that I dont really need. So while I figure out the best way to do it, I use this excel sheet.

    Apart from using this as scratchpad, I also have this one workbook where I list things to be done. This is not my todo list per se but this helps me get a glimpse of all the things that I am supposed to do. You may want to use Trello for similar actions. In fact I know of a startup that uses Trello for exactly this purpose.
    Screencap of my excel sheet.

    Please do note the heading of today, work, people, misc tasks and most importantly, improve self. And yes, do note that long list of things that I need to do today. There are three columns of work because I did not want the columns to spill over than one screen. And to schedule these tasks, I put these in workflowy. I know there is redundancy in what I do to manage my life. But this seems to work for me and like all other creatures of habit, I am used to this now.

    So this is where my love with Excel ends. Oh, and the document resides on Google Drive. With the new version of office, you could sync files to Office 360 account anyway.

    2. Evernote
    I can not begin to tell you about the brilliance of a note-taking app. Especially Evernote. Evernote allows you to create, save and retrieve notes in a very intuitive desktop app, a very usage mobile phone app and a sucky online interface. The great part is that everything comes together without too many issues and I can use hashtags to sort things. Its like parking things in the brain and then forgetting about those. And then getting surprised as you stumble onto something totally unrelated while you are looking for something else (read serendipity). Its like outsourcing the archiving function of your brain.

    I love that I can save things on evernote and forget about forgetting. So I know that I have saved a note about all active VCs that are still funding non-IIT, non-IIM students. I may not recall the names but I know I can fire evernote and retrieve it.

    You know that thing about "things you know you know", "things you know you dont know" and "things you dont know you dont know"? Evernote is your companion for "things you know you know").

    I can NOT recommend an alternative for Evernote. If you want to take away two things from this blogpost, Evernote has to be the one. The second? I will come to it in a bit. Oh, and since Evernote went mad and starting charging for great features (email to evernote, offline access etc), I have been thinking of finding an alternative. Recently started using OneNote. Not enjoying it so far. Lets see where it goes. (If you are curious, for the transition, I am using OneNote exclusively for one big big project - so I am forced to fire if often as I work)

    3. E.ggtimer
    Its like a countdown clock app. There are thousands of these. You may pick any. I find E.ggtimer.com to be the best and easiest to use. I have dragged the link of a 25 minutes clock (http://e.ggtimer.com/25minutes) to my shortcuts bar. One click on it, I am taken to a screen that starts counting back from 25 minutes.

    Why 25 minutes? Studies after studies have shown that 25 minutes is an optimal time to reach / remain / deliver with your best concentration. And then apparently a 5-min break helps you recharge your attention and get back to more sessions of 25 minutes.

    Also, I can plan my life. I plan all tasks to last in either 25 minute bunches. Or in 5 minute bunches. So if I know that I have to get into a longish phone call, I know that that 30 minute slot is gone. If I want to do pee, I force a 5-minute time frame for it. If I have to respond to email and its going to be a one line reply, I can do it in 5 minutes. Or I can club all my emails and replies in a 25-min slot. And so on and so forth. Imagine that you have just two units of time. 5 minutes and 25 minutes. Everything else is no longer valid. In fact I would love to buy a watch that has 5-min and 25-min units on it.

    If 25 doesn't work for you, EggTimer allows you to choose your time windows. But trust me, 25 is optimal. Well, you may argue. But I think this is a philosophical thing. You want to have a discussion? Lets do it over a drink ;) Also, you may also want to read about Pomodoro. And Flow.

    4. WorkFlowy
    Remember I said that if you could take two things away from this piece, Evernote is one? Workflowy is the second. And come to think of it, there is a third as well. Come to that in a bit.

    So, before anything, love the way they market themselves. They say, "make lists, not war." Remember "Code is Poetry" on Wordpress / Automattic? Apart from make lists, workflowy, on their home page say that Slack was started with Workflowy, Twitter's co-founder uses Workflowy everyday and so on and so forth. As a guy who lives on the fringes of the tech industry, this is awesome. I mean how cool is that that you use the same tool as Ev?
    Screencap from Workflowy.com

    So, without further ado, Workflowy is an outlining tool that helps you make nested lists of things that you want to do. Think of it as a decision tree visualized as a list. Like trees, there are nodes and childs and you can collapse / expand, mark them as read, unread etc. You can't really set deadlines per se but I use hashtags to get things done. You can use it on your phone, you can use it on your laptop.

    Screencap from my Workflowy
    Anyway. I can extol the virtues of Workflowy for three days. Coming back, my workflowy has 4 key sections.
    • Todo - things that I need done. 
    • Life goals - things that interest me and I want to do something tangible with those. 
    • Projects - things that give me money.
    • Personal - things important to me. I have cropped those out.
    Each of these 4 can be expanded to show more items under that list. Once I finish things I strike them off. I can easily toggle view to see things that I have done already. Or are open.

    Using Workflowy, I have outlined by next book already (which is late by a year). I have a list of things that I want to work on. I have a list of people to pitch for work. I love how everything is contextual and comes together neatly. I love how its convenient to see things in one glace. Its like I am able to see the big picture and the details. And it suits my personality perfectly.

    Workflowy is brilliant. If I could also add dates in it, I could replace all my tools. But then Workflowy is expensive (I think 49 USD for a year). I got lucky to get free one-year subscription from an offer on AppSumo. And as someone who has hardly paid money for software, I am willing to renew the subscription!

    Also, do read Atul Gawande's Checklist Manifesto. Also, do read http://www.ducttapemarketing.com/blog/workflowy-to-keep-organized to know how other people use Workflowy.

    5. Google Calendar
    I do not know of a better calendar app than this. There are people who talk about Sunrise and Fantastical and I dont know what else. For some reason I haven't had the need to find an alternative. May be because I am averse to change? May be because I am comfortable operating out in the Google environment? Or may be I dont expect many frills from the app. I dont need directions, reminders and other integration. And may be I hardly use my "work" tools on phone. I need a laptop, a computer to operate.

    Side point: I know of many people who have moved / migrated to mobile for work (from creating pitch decks to making excel sheets to project management to calendars), I am still old school. I need a laptop for "work." Also, my mobile habits are very unlike most people I know of. I hardly watch video on my mobile (when I say hardly, I mean one / two videos a day), I dont use FB on my mobile. In fact the only apps I use on my phone are Google Maps, email, Firefox, WhatsApp, Twitter, Pocket, Uber, Tinder and Instagram. I dont read news on my phone, I dont check Facebook, I dont order food, I dont call a plumber, I dont book airline tickets. I am lazy.  No news, no Facebook, no food ordering apps, no airline tickets. I dont know the global average but I reckon my usage of my mobile device is skewed.
    Screencap from my gCal
    So back to Google Calendar. I am anal with its use and I plot and plan even dates with Tinder matches on the Calendar.

    Of course, for each thing (client 1, client 2, dates,  Cyntax etc.) I do, I have a separate calendar. It helps me keep things color coordinated and all that. I can also share tasks and deadlines with a specific set of people if I have separate calendars.

    Finally, the entries in the calendar help me reconcile the amount of work I have done for a specific client. Ideally I should be able to track costs and raise bills from within Google Calendar. But for a free software, it does a lot anyway.

    So, lemme talk about a tool that I have to use to maintain timesheets (and in future, raise bills as it has a billing module).

    6. Toggl.com
    I use Toggl to keep track of timesheets. Since I work for multiple clients in multiple organization and my billing is time based (rather than project based), I need a system to keep track of time I spend on something. Toggl is yet another Freemium cloud-based tool that gives me access to a large part of its functionality without paying any money.

    I have been toying with it over the last few months. Starting today, I will use it lot more often. Lets see how it goes.

    Just that if Toggl could incorporate features of an e.ggtimer.com, they would help me save more time!

    7. iTunes + Headphones
    While I love working out of coffee shops and love to have activity around me, there are times when I want to focus. Music helps me do that. No, not the white noise or meditation music or something like that. Good old regular Bollywood, Indipop and a bit of international selection does the trick for me.

    So that's it! Pretty simple and yet gets shit done for me! And here is something that Steve Jobs loved to say, and I remain committed to it... 


     I had to ship this. Thanks to Monica for pushing me to write this. Hope this helps. Hope this was worth the wait. In the spirit of making this a comprehensive post, some other tools that the world uses are...
    • Slack - For communication. I tried using it but it was a pain in ass to get more people use Slack for communication. It ended up becoming yet another messaging tool. So I stopped it. But I know a lot of people who cant live without Slack.
    • Feedly - All my news reading (of passive kind) from sources that I want to read news from happens via Feedly.
    • Dropbox - For files that I have to send to client. I dont use weTransfer or YouSendIt etc. Unless clients specifically ask for these.
    • Pocket - All the active reading (where someone recommends a link) happens over Pocket. I push links into Pocket queue and continue to read through when on the go. To me, there are two kinds of reading. Three actually. A- Pleasure - fiction, blogs of friends, twitter crushes, things like serial etc. B - Mandatory - news and other things that I have to read and see and listen to stay relevant in the world. C - Play - things that interest me and may or may not be relevant to my work. Things like which Diet regimen is better - Paleo or Keto or Lo Carb or Slow Carb or Vegan? You get the drift.
    • Producteev - Producteev is your todo list + calendar + project management all rolled into one. And that is what makes it so so powerful. You can further divide tasks into projects, add labels (read hashtags), allocate to people and share the links. I used Producteev a lot, before Workflowy. Not anymore. For reasons mentioned above. 
    That's all folks.

    In the end, thanks once again to Monica for the prompt and multiple reminders. And here are few standard disclaimers...
    • No animals were harmed in the making of this blogpost
    • If something works for me, does not mean that it will work for you. Use at your own risk
    • If you do end up using advice that I have dispensed here, please do share this with others
    • If this post is brilliant, please give me work. Drop me a line at saurabh.garg@gmail.com
    • If this is better than sex, please do drop me a line ;P
    • If you want me to write for your publication on productivity, I would be happy to do so, in exchange for a review of my book
    Disclaimer: Few links have my referral codes embedded into those. Trying this for the first time. Lets see if it works. Please do know that referral codes no NOT fuck around with your experience or pricing. Thanks!

    Serendipity 101

    yesterday Few days ago #sgMS asked me about some hotel that she had recommended to me some time back - she had apparently forgotten its name.

    So, normally any words that come out of her, I latch on like they're precious stones. I often tend to remember what she says and I am kinda quick on my feet as well. For things that I know are too tough to remember, I make long notes with Evernote (under the #sgMS tag, I have notes about what she likes, what she hates, the cities that she wants to travel to, the kind of lifestyle she wants to live and so on and so forth.)

    Coming back, that day when she asked me, for some reason I could not recall the name of the hotel. And there is no way I was going to disappoint her. So I dropped everything I was doing, to try and find the name of the hotel that she had once mentioned in the passing during an innocent conversation. 

    I went through EVERY email we'd EVER exchanged, browsed through our recent conversations on iMessage and WhatsApp and read every note I have made about her. It was a four-hour long exercise, excruciating to start with but full of nostalgia as I saw, browsed, read.

    I did everything I could but I could not find the name of the hotel.

    However I did discover that I still love her. And I still pine for her. And I still want to be with her.

    Of course she has a different take. She believes we are happier away from each other. Of course she is never wrong and I am never right. I trust her judgement and I shall remain away. In misery celebration. I will not make any attempts to call her, meet her. I hereby promise I will not initiate contact with her unless its absolutely necessary. I will have my week moments and I will try and not break this verbal written contract.

    Wish me luck!

    P.S.: Of course "absolute necessary" is a loose term and I may misuse it. But I shall consider this as a form of tapasya. If I keep at it for long enough, may be some day I'd get what I want - her!

    Pointless!

    Source: Unknown
    You see the curve? The irregular sinusoidal curve? My mood is like that. I start the day on a high. I make my bed, make a list of things to do, visualize my short-term and long-term goals and go out with all the positivity. I appreciate small things in life - sunshine, birds, trees and the sky. I observe things rather than making a judgement. I dont yell on people and I try and get all the good karma I can.

    I feel like the success kid and I am all determined to take on the world!


    Life looks rosy and I have this inkling that great things are going to happen to me. In anticipation I start "living" the life that I crave for (a la The Secret). And I open my arms wide and strong, ready to recieve the goodness that the world would apprantly shower on m. 

    I reach wherever I want to (coffee shop, clients office, borrowed desk) and by the time I arrive, I start falling into this mild, for want of better word, depression. I start questioning the very meaning of what I am upto. Things that I am doing - they dont matter no more. Where I start thinking about the reason of doing things. Where I wonder about the whole damn point of being in a world where life is unfair. Someone like me, who thinks he works harder than anyone else that he knows of, is poor and gets a raw deal all the time. Of course there are great things that has happened to him but overall, in grand scheme of things, he's got the raw deal. There is no sex or cash, no friends, no future and nothing else to look upto. Everything feels like a futile attempt. Its like staring down the abyss.

    The worst part of this feeling is that I am not alone. I know so so many people just like me. The ones who keep trying and keep going on without any hope or any possibility.

    But then the selfish fuck in me pushes the pathos for others on a back seat. I concentrate on myself. And I realize that I am unhappy and I am discontent.

    There are quite a few reasons for the feeling. The first and foremost is the fact that I did not get lucky with the Ovarian Lottery. Like the poor kid on the left, in the image on the left, I have had to climb really steep ladders while I see very average people doing better because they had things served to them on a platter.

    The other thing is that I have had to work really hard for every rupee that I've earned while the word around me seems to get it easy!

    And then my money does not word hard. For every rupee I spend, I do not get its equivalent worth.

    First bit (losing out on Ovarian Lottery) is a random luck. The second is something that I can control and yet I cant because of the value system that I have been ingrained with. I wish I could unlearn em. Once a middle class, always a middle class!

    When this bout of self-pity gets too much, I stagger to YouTube and fire up the latest Kamal R Khan video and world starts looking bright all over again. Side note: Do see his collection on Youtube if you have time. Here is the link.

    I wish I could love myself the way KRK does. In a world where self-love could be so, selfless, nothing can touch you!

    But then, moment the video is over, I am back to the gloom of diminishing bank balance, lost opportunities and comparison with friends who are dollar millionaires and yet make a stupid show about their poverty - wish they accepted that they are doing well and stopped pulling legs of people like me who barely get by.

    At this point, I try to count my blessings - amazing parents that are so selfless that I dont believe them at times (while I continue to cry about Ovarian Lottery), opportunity to have traveled the world, option to work for myself (and make enough to pay my rent and earn my bread, while sending nothing home), ability to choose the kind of work I want to do (not that what I do has changed the world) and so on and do forth. Side note: Did you notice all the disclaimers?

    But then I realize that I am not alone. And I havent done it all. I have a fucking Jack of all trades at best and Jacks often end up as JackAsses. See that lame attempt at pun? And I claim to be an author!

    I think I'd end this post with this lame attempt at poetry...
    P.S.: In fact, as I finish writing this piece, I am even wondering about the reason of this blog. I dont think anyone reads what I write (apart from people who land on this page via Google). And I definitiely dont go back to read how I was feeling at some point in the past. May be its just a way to vent? But to what end? Pointless. Like life!

    Hello, Acme Corporation!

    While I was growing up, two of my favorite cartoons were The Roadrunner and Pinky & The Brain.

    Roadrunner was about this dude, Wile E. Coyote who devises complex plots and traps and uses innovative devices and tools to try and catch the ever-elusive roadrunner. The other, Pinky & Brain is about these two genetically enhanced lab rats that keeping scheming to take over the world.

    But then, this post is not about Wile. Or about Brain. This is about this company called Acme (In Roadrunner, Wile orders his tools from Acme Corporation and in Pinky & Brain, the mice reside in the Acme Labs).

    Wikipedia says, Acme Corporation is...
    ...a fictional corporation that features prominently in the Road Runner/Wile E. Coyote cartoons as a running gag featuring outlandish products that fail or backfire catastrophically at the worst possible times.
    Now, of all the things that I've ever wanted to do in life (including the plans to take over the world), most are pretty outlandish and the rest have a very high probability of failing or backfiring. It is apt that I attempt creating an Acme, after Cyntax and Banyan Tree.

    So, if all goes well, I will have some version of Acme to work with. And I shall use it to bring all my outlandish plans to life!

    Wish me luck :)

    Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames!

    Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames. - Rumi
    I read this line and the first reaction I had was, "Oh Faaaaaaaakkk!"

    The kinds that I often have when I see something exemplary, something out of the world, something that makes me stop in my track and take note. Something that makes me jealous. Something that I wish I had done (or said, or written, or achieved).

    And its something that hasn't happened in a while. Last few days have been really really draining. I cant think of a reason though. Just that I've been under the weather couple of times, I have been missing #sgMS, I seem to be on losing spree in my poker home game, work hasn't been taking me anywhere, the inspiration for book2 seems to have run dry and so on and so forth.

    Wait! I digressed!

    I am here to talk about Rumi. Coming back.

    So, yesterday a couple of days ago a few days ago my sis told me about Rumi. And told me about some of those million amazing things that he's said.

    And I was blown (for want of a better word). I was "Oh Faaaaaaaakkk!" and I was more. I was inspired. It was like that awakening! I felt that all the years that have gone when I did not experience Rumi, I have wasted those!

    Source: This website

    Thing is, I had known about Rumi all along but I had never given him attention. I had dismissed him as yet another in the Kabir, Bulleh Shah category that I had planned to explore in detail once I have time. But then my sis told me about him and I was hooked! The calling, if I may, to read Rumi, explore Rumi is so strong, so magnetic, so unidirectional that I have to, have to read about him. And I have been reading things on wikipedia, browsing things on Pinterest and Facebook and all such places.

    Each piece that I read takes me further. Each piece makes me think. Each piece makes me smile. Each piece makes me reflect on my life and my decisions and the state of mind I am in. Each piece is a golden nugget of advice. Each piece is apt. Each piece is a university degree in itself. Each piece is illuminating. Each piece makes you better. Each piece is so simple and yet so powerful that its amazing he could say it with such simplicity!

    Go read some Rumi. Go get high on his simplicity. Go indulge your senses. Go put yourself at the mercy of the power of words. Go seek. Or may be, he's seeking you?

    One of things he said was,
    What you seek is seeking you.

    #lifeGoals

    So this is a long list of things that I hope I can achieve in life. I may or may not have the talent, skill, determination, energy, time et al for these but I would love to do these. And no, not to be confused with the bucket list.
    1. Write something as amazing as Hoshwalon Ko Khabar Kya. Here is a sample. And Write something as cool as Lag Ja Gale. Here. Basically write well. So well that junta wants to sing em. So well that it moves people.
    2. Get 10K followers on twitter. As of today, I have 2400 odd followers. 
    3. Travel only business class. 
    4. May be climb the Everest! (update: I aim to do this by 2025).
    5. Spot a page 3 celeb reading one of my books. 
    6. Date a supermodel.
    7. Make a Fucket List. And do things on it. Yes, with an F. 
    More as I go along.

    P.S.: For the uninitiated, bucket list is where I get serious about things. #lifeGoals is more about vanity. 

    Rant on Mumbai

    Yesterday I was coming back from some place at around 9 (pm). To reach home, I cross the most godforsaken place in the world - Saki Naka (the wikipedia article does not do justice to the fuckery this place is. And its worse than the place where I live in Delhi). Since I knew that I was going to get stuck in traffic, I was in a really foul mood. This is when I looked out of the rick and saw a man my father's age running behind a bus, trying to catch it. He had a backpack and he was wearing regular trousers and a shirt. At the risk of generalizing, he looked like a clerk or some other administrative person - one of the millions in the great Indian middle-class. 

    Since there was traffic, the bus was barely crawling ahead. My rick was right behind the bus and the man was literally running parallel to the rick I was in. And since the man was old, he could run only at a certain speed and the crawl-speed of the bus was more than what the man could run at. He knew and I knew and probably everyone around knew that he was not going to catch the bus. And yet he kept chasing the bus. Despite the inevitable, he continued to chase. And he did it with all the fervor he could.

    As the traffic opened up, the bus zoomed ahead and whatever little hopes that man had of catching the bus went in smoke. And the man finally quit the chase. With a shrug. And then he started to walk. And there was some purpose in the way he walked! I loved it. I loved the way he went about it. I wish I had that spirit. I wish I had the grit that he had.

    Anyhow while I was thinking about it, I realized a few things.

    A. He was old. If my father were to run like that, I would be really really sad. And come to think of it, my father has used public transport all his life. Am sure he would have chased buses and trains while working. Me on the other hand, I have used public transport only till the time I was in the college. After that I had a bike. And enough money to hire a rickshaw or taxi or something private. I am extremely lucky to have a family that has supported me with all that.

    B. While I may crib about my inability to make enough money and get sad about it, there are so so many people that have far less than what I have and are struggling with even the basics, and yet they are happy. I mean that old man. He was ok to run to catch his bus. And I am sure it must be a routine for him. And yet he was ok with it. He knows that he will win some and lose some. And here I am. Who's never had to lose anything!

    C. Mumbai is a tough tough place to live in. My life is little comfortable - I have a big enough place to live in, enough money to pay for rickshaws and Ubers, enough money to eat what I want to, when I want to, where I want to, enough to take those foreign holidays and so on and so forth. And despite all this, I feel strained. The mere existence in Mumbai is tough. At times I want to leave everything and move to the mountains - which I would've done if I #tnks had sold well (after all purpose, passion and success are all interlinked!). May be I would if #book2 does well. I dont know if I can be a Ruskin Bond but I would try.

    I digressed. The point is, Mumbai is a tough tough place to live in! And I have been shielded from the toughness to a large extent. I do not know what dirt and grime and heat and dust is like. I just cry like a baby. I need to stop that.

    D. While the spirit struggle of Mumbai is a great thing, I am not sure I appreciate that a place could put such a large chunk of humanity in such miserable conditions. And each person is trapped in Mumbai because they dont have anywhere else to go, anything else to do. The ones who've made it are ok, the ones who haven't are too tired to move on. Life looks hunky dory from our Ubers and air-conditioned offices and lavish parties at five-stars and view from atop the high-rises and occasional travels abroad and fancy things that we talk while we work. But in real life, life is lot more than that. And we need to somehow learn.

    If nothing, the resolve to help the ones who lost on the ovarian lottery is now stronger. Once I have reached a point when I have made enough (I dont know what is enough), I would really work towards generating employment, elevating the lives, education and health. Basically go the Bill Gates way. Some day. Not today. I could jump in today but the impact that I would have would be limited. I dont want to impact ten lives. I would rather do create a fortune and then use that to bring about change on a larger scale. Like Bill Gates! Again I am digressing. The point is that Mumbai is a tough place to make a living. And the scene yesterday made me rethink my choice to stay in Mumbai.

    Oh, to end this, barely five minutes after I saw that old man, I saw another man - this time far younger, sprinting behind a bus that he knew that he was never going to catch. He was in a Jet Airways uniform and looked like a loader or helper. The he was running, it was remarkable! I dont think I can run like ever! Plus, the thing is, he would've walked from the airport to the junction and then must have missed his bus. Life is so fucking tough and here I am lamenting about my inability to afford a car or a better lifestyle!

    Oh Mumbai - the maya nagri! It is so so difficult to love you. And even more difficult to hate you!

    The Nidhi Kapoor Story

    Did you like this post? May be you want to read my first book - The Nidhi Kapoor Story.

    Check it out on Amazon or Flipkart?