Yesterday I had to stay up to finish a thing I was working on. And it was tough. No, not the thing that I was working on. But staying up.
So tough that I roamed around like a zombie in the house.
I have this friend who's shacking up with me for a few days. And since this is a Mumbai house, he's using the hall as his bedroom. The guy told me that I sort of scared him with all the feet that I was dragging along the entire night.
I just could not stay up. Despite my earnest efforts.
And it sucks. Suck so bad that I am blogging about it.
Thing is I have always taken pride in my ability to get by with little sleep or food or other such worldly comforts. I do need a lot of safai, water, and access to a clean loo. But lately, since I've got on the sleep-more bandwagon and have become that boring old man that sleeps at 10 and wakes up at 5, I am used to spending 7-8 hours on the bed. What I do there is anyone's guess but I do try and be on the bed for that long.
Now, yesterday, when I had this important submission, I was initially unfazed. After all, I haven't needed a lot of sleep. I thought it would be a cakewalk. And to make matters easy, I loaded my ref with Diet Coke, Diet Chiwda, Diet Air and Diet BS. Who could stop me?
Well, myself!
Thanks to my old age, I just could not focus on the task at hand. I would doze off even while I was walking around. I was bouncing off the walls. Literally. I drank I don't know how much water and I don't know how much I peed but I do know that by the end of it, I was so sick and tired of all the visits to the loo that I parked myself outside. And while I was parked there, I dozed off as well.
Thankfully, the work I was doing was a writing gig. And I remembered that if you are a writer, you do not let the piece make you its muse. Rather you make it your bitch and belt it out when you feel like. So, I decided that even though all odds are stacked against it. And I promised myself that I would not sleep unless I do it!
Just that my body clock and age had decided that they would make it tough for me.
However, I persisted and finished the piece. The lesson I took away from that is that as I age, health has started to become an increasingly important component. Thankfully I am a little stable in the head (I think) and thus I have been able to survive. Need to do a lot more work on my physical fitness. Will make 2020 about fitness. And that means food and working out. Things that I have traditionally ignored.
Will work on starting now! Wait and watch!
About 12 hours after I caught some sleep, I am still reeling from the effects of not sleeping. Even this piece is not the best that I've written. I HAVE to fix things!
Showing posts with label Writing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Writing. Show all posts
On writing (from my newsletter)...
Wrote this in today's edition of my daily-ish newsletter. Subscribe here. Thought it deserved a wider subscription.
So, I am left with writing as the thing to find an escape. And to find inspiration. And to try and get to salvation. Of course, I am yet to reach a point where I can say that I am good writer, the point, ladies and gents, is, writing is what makes me happy and makes me forget the fuckeries and vagaries of the world around me. And you know what, I am grateful about it. I just need to do a lot more of it!
What I write, to be honest has nothing to do with my book or the film. Neither it inspires any of my readers to do anything extraordinary. But to me, writing is about writing for the sake of writing. You know, getting some words on paper (or keystrokes on a laptop) is like the best thing that can ever happen to me. I mean, I can't paint. I don't have the ability to hold attention. I am not well-read (ok, I read a lot but I haven't read deeply about things - you know, have merely scratched the surface). I cant doodle. I am not funny. I have two left feet (so dance is out). I am the greatest bathroom singer to have ever walked the Mother Earth and thus I must never sing outside. The guitar and the Uke are rotting in some corners in the house. Bicycling is not my thing. Clubs are boring. I'd love to take photographs but requires way too much patience. Video games were a thing when I was younger - now, I don't have the reflexes. I would watch TV when I had more time but with attention spans getting shorter and time becoming increasingly rare, I tend to pick other things to invest my time on.
So, I am left with writing as the thing to find an escape. And to find inspiration. And to try and get to salvation. Of course, I am yet to reach a point where I can say that I am good writer, the point, ladies and gents, is, writing is what makes me happy and makes me forget the fuckeries and vagaries of the world around me. And you know what, I am grateful about it. I just need to do a lot more of it!
<end>
Originally posted in today's edition of my daily-ish newsletter. Subscribe here.
Thank you, Harshit
I started a new project yesterday. Each day, I plan to write a post acknowledging people that have helped me become who I am. This idea has been inspired by Shatrujeet's series, a100peopletothank. This is post 2 in the series. My series has the tag #sg100peopleToThank.
Thank you, Harshit.
I first met Harshit (Instagram) some 3-4 years ago (I don't recall how we connected but I do remember it was about a startup he was planning) at Starbucks, Powai (where else?). When we met, I am not sure if I were impressed by him but I did realise that he has this, unbound, ambition. I do remember that I tried to poach him. But he did not fall into my glibness and he said no.
We lost touch for a while and then out of the blues, he asked me to meet him.
Of course, I never say no to meeting new people (as long as meet me in a 3 KM radius of where I live). He volunteered to come to the office and we sat and talked and talked. Yet again, I did not think much of him.
Among other things, in this meeting, he talked to me about his admiration for Shahrukh Khan. And anyone that loves SRK is automatically a blood relative! Harshit went so far as to narrate word-to-word SRK's now famous speech (video, text) where he equates poverty with failure. SRK said, "I equated poverty with failure. I just didn’t want to be poor." I take inspiration from this piece. And so does Harshit! And we could've left that meeting on this shared fandom obsession for SRK, but no.
While parting, Harshit asked me about things that I needed help on. I told him that I needed someone to do tech for an idea I was working on at the time and I needed someone to help me with growing business at C4E.
And without expecting anything in return, he connected me to Abhinav (who has now become a close collaborator on most projects). And he helped me meet a few potential clients (I could not convert any - not his problem).
As things moved along, we started meeting frequently and I realised that he is one heck of a conversationalist! To a point that I started sharing my deepest secrets with him. And instead of making fun of me or something, he started to offer help. He started to badger me to do more. And like a great pupil, I would continue to ignore. He became this persistent voice at the back of my head that would not leave me alone if I did not deliver!
Then one day he called and said that he wants to throw me (and some others) a challenge to do 100 pushups over the next 30 days. I said I can't do anything to do with fitness and I volunteered that I'd rather write 1000 words a day. He agreed and asked me to write a 1000 words and post them on a public forum.
Even though I accepted the challenge, I kept dilly-dallying. And he did not stop her badgering and pushing me. I hated him from the bottom of my heart. And I felt miserable about not being able to work. Here is one snippet from my notes about a meeting with him...
 |
| This is from my notes. I started writing the SoG series from the 27th of Oct, right after this note! Guess I've had enough of Harshit and Krishna chasing me! |
Eventually, I gave in and I started to write a 1000 words a day. Those words took shape of Shoulders of Giants (#SoG), a series of letters to select friends where I would share whatever I learnt in the day gone by.
I sent the first letter on the 27th of Oct 2018 (a copy is located here). Since then I have written a few (archived here). Oh, I can't write about SoG and not write about Krishna. While Harshit gave me the push, it was Krishna that helped me give shape to the thoughts and idea behind the letters. More on these some other time.
As I end this, I HAVE to say that the thing that I relate most to him, and what I've learnt from him, and what I respect him for is perseverance. He has this maaaaad perseverance of an obsessive, maniacal person. If he sets his eyes onto something, he gets it. Case in point? His Crossfit training. Since he moved to Lucknow, he is doing whatever it takes to become super fit and compete in the Crossfit games. He wakes up before 4:30 (which is inhuman), goes to the gym and sends one inspiring quote EVERY day! Every day! An archive is on his Instagram feed. That's some consistency and commitment. If I had that kind of commitment, I would reach my lifeGoals faster and sooner!
Oh, and Harshit is a clear example of a connection that I would've never made if I did not go out of my way and told the Universe that I wanted to meet more people. And it wouldn't happen if Harshit wasn't the same! Apart from being a friend, Harshit is superconnector (has connected me to some really interesting people) and a believer in me.
Lesson for me? And others? Go out, meet more people. And while you are at it, see this TED talk that talks about what makes a good life. Like they say, it helps to hustle :)
In the end, thank you, Harshit. For inspiring me to push myself harder. And specifically for nudging me to create SoG. I sincerely wish you were in Mumbai. I would've loved to spend more time with him. Maybe sometime in future. I remain hopeful :)
Thank you, Shatrujeet!
I am starting a new project today. Each day, for the next 100 days, I will write a post acknowledging people that have helped me become who I am. I got inspired by Shatrujeet's series, a100peopletothank.
So, the first one is, N Shatrujeet! Who else?
I first met Shatru (I call him that) when I was at Creativeland (CLA). This is 2008 or 9. Don't remember the exact year. While I was part of the planning function, he was there to develop some original content for some division at CLA (I don't recall the specifics). My interactions with him were limited, but for some reason, I knew that he is among the more interesting ones there. I had this instant liking for him. Or maybe because he was the only other person in the office that was not fancy?
So at work, while we kept to our respective teams and reporting managers (he sat at a different area, I had my things to work on), we would often hang out together. Often, not frequent.
Mid of 2009, I moved on from CLA. So did he (dunno when).
Years later when I was with Gravity, Shatru had partnered with Gaurrav Dhar (who was also at CLA briefly, though my interactions were very limited) to work on some content ideas. For one of the projects, he needed someone with expertise in event management. He got in touch with me and we did work on some really interesting ideas.
Apart from what we were working on, this was the time when I think Shatru was writing The Karachi Deception (writing, not published mind you). And this was the first time ever when I realised what writing a book could entail. He would often talk about the progress on the story and the challenges he was facing with it. I even got to read a preview copy (my claim to fame till date)!
Those interactions with Shatru probably watered the seed that was planted in my head since I was a kid! If #tnks has happened, it is because I was fortunate to have spent time with Shatru.
So, thank you, Shatru. For all that you've taught me while we were working together. And now, as life has become increasingly busy for both you and me, from a distance. Case in point? I read that you've now reached a point where you can do a plank for 5 minutes. Which is tough but manageable with time, grit, patience and practise.
But you know what is tougher? Quitting smoking! You've quit smoking. Shatru, it's the biggest change you've made. Biggest and tallest than them Sequoia trees! You loved your smokes so much that even now I can't picture you without one. I mean I do NOT have a single memory of you where you aren't holding onto a cigarette. You loved them like I love the tap-tap that the keyboard makes when I am writing something. And yet you quit. And I am so so proud and stoked. And I am inspired.
Shatru, if you can quit smoking and do those planks, I can too.
Inspired by you (and others), this April onwards, I will make my health my priority. I will stop with the Coke. And I will carry my protein shakes and almonds and others. I will not put anything in my system that fucks with it. Really. As I write this, it's almost the end of the but. But you'd be glad to know, I started today!
In the end, Thank you, Shatru! For teaching me how to tell great stories. And for inspiring me to become better with each passing day. You are a mentor, a guru and on top of everything else, a friend, Shatru.
Good luck with Vikram and all other adventures you concoct.
So, the first one is, N Shatrujeet! Who else?
I first met Shatru (I call him that) when I was at Creativeland (CLA). This is 2008 or 9. Don't remember the exact year. While I was part of the planning function, he was there to develop some original content for some division at CLA (I don't recall the specifics). My interactions with him were limited, but for some reason, I knew that he is among the more interesting ones there. I had this instant liking for him. Or maybe because he was the only other person in the office that was not fancy?
So at work, while we kept to our respective teams and reporting managers (he sat at a different area, I had my things to work on), we would often hang out together. Often, not frequent.
Mid of 2009, I moved on from CLA. So did he (dunno when).
Years later when I was with Gravity, Shatru had partnered with Gaurrav Dhar (who was also at CLA briefly, though my interactions were very limited) to work on some content ideas. For one of the projects, he needed someone with expertise in event management. He got in touch with me and we did work on some really interesting ideas.
Apart from what we were working on, this was the time when I think Shatru was writing The Karachi Deception (writing, not published mind you). And this was the first time ever when I realised what writing a book could entail. He would often talk about the progress on the story and the challenges he was facing with it. I even got to read a preview copy (my claim to fame till date)!
Those interactions with Shatru probably watered the seed that was planted in my head since I was a kid! If #tnks has happened, it is because I was fortunate to have spent time with Shatru.
So, thank you, Shatru. For all that you've taught me while we were working together. And now, as life has become increasingly busy for both you and me, from a distance. Case in point? I read that you've now reached a point where you can do a plank for 5 minutes. Which is tough but manageable with time, grit, patience and practise.
But you know what is tougher? Quitting smoking! You've quit smoking. Shatru, it's the biggest change you've made. Biggest and tallest than them Sequoia trees! You loved your smokes so much that even now I can't picture you without one. I mean I do NOT have a single memory of you where you aren't holding onto a cigarette. You loved them like I love the tap-tap that the keyboard makes when I am writing something. And yet you quit. And I am so so proud and stoked. And I am inspired.
Shatru, if you can quit smoking and do those planks, I can too.
Inspired by you (and others), this April onwards, I will make my health my priority. I will stop with the Coke. And I will carry my protein shakes and almonds and others. I will not put anything in my system that fucks with it. Really. As I write this, it's almost the end of the but. But you'd be glad to know, I started today!
In the end, Thank you, Shatru! For teaching me how to tell great stories. And for inspiring me to become better with each passing day. You are a mentor, a guru and on top of everything else, a friend, Shatru.
Good luck with Vikram and all other adventures you concoct.
A new writing project - Secret Diary of an Uber Driver
Lately, I have been using this app called Headspace to meditate and get sleep. While meditation is a guided "lesson" in one or more disciplines of life, sleep is where I listen to bedtime stories that have soothing voiceovers, ambient noises that humans like when they sleep and calming non-commital stories. You know how those old nannies would sing a lullaby? You know soft kitty, warm kitty? That!
So, one of the sleep stories on Headspace is a mid-night scene from a Laundromat. In that, its the story of a boring room where people come and wash their clothes. And while they wash, the machines make this rhythmic sounds that are sleep-inducing. I don't know the science but they work! In the story, they talk about people and that's when it hit me. What if I wrote a book, a collection of stories about people where they are at a certain place for a short time and reveal a small part of their lives. And that's it!
Lets park this here. Call this A.
You've seen Forrest Gump? Essentially, the entire movie is in a flashback as Forrest sits on a bus stop and narrates various slices to various people. Let's call this B.
On my way back home yesterday, I was in an Uber and I had this long conversation with the driver on Punjabi music (see tweet). In that conversation, the driver told me about the kind of people that sit in his car. From a couple that the driver thought was faking it, to an old man that shed tears for some reason, to a student running late for her exam, to so many more. Each ride, he said, was a story! And while some may come across as commonplace stories, I am sure there would be many that would be worth telling. And worth listening. And worth spreading. This is C.
Now, if I club A, B and C, what if I worked with the driver to write a series of short stories about the people that travel in these cabs? Each of these is inspired by the riders. Each of these has some element of truth. And then there is fiction. And the element of storytelling.
What do you think? Would you read? Would you share?
Oh, I call it the 'Secret Diary of an Uber Driver'.
Lemme know!
PS: I know you may be thinking of privacy and all that. At no point, we would use any personally identifiable information when we write these stories.
PPS: Why would I do this? As a writer, I need practise. And while the daily SoG and Book2 are happening, I need to flex the muscle. And this is a pretty interesting way. No?
So, one of the sleep stories on Headspace is a mid-night scene from a Laundromat. In that, its the story of a boring room where people come and wash their clothes. And while they wash, the machines make this rhythmic sounds that are sleep-inducing. I don't know the science but they work! In the story, they talk about people and that's when it hit me. What if I wrote a book, a collection of stories about people where they are at a certain place for a short time and reveal a small part of their lives. And that's it!
Lets park this here. Call this A.
You've seen Forrest Gump? Essentially, the entire movie is in a flashback as Forrest sits on a bus stop and narrates various slices to various people. Let's call this B.
On my way back home yesterday, I was in an Uber and I had this long conversation with the driver on Punjabi music (see tweet). In that conversation, the driver told me about the kind of people that sit in his car. From a couple that the driver thought was faking it, to an old man that shed tears for some reason, to a student running late for her exam, to so many more. Each ride, he said, was a story! And while some may come across as commonplace stories, I am sure there would be many that would be worth telling. And worth listening. And worth spreading. This is C.
Now, if I club A, B and C, what if I worked with the driver to write a series of short stories about the people that travel in these cabs? Each of these is inspired by the riders. Each of these has some element of truth. And then there is fiction. And the element of storytelling.
What do you think? Would you read? Would you share?
Oh, I call it the 'Secret Diary of an Uber Driver'.
Lemme know!
PS: I know you may be thinking of privacy and all that. At no point, we would use any personally identifiable information when we write these stories.
PPS: Why would I do this? As a writer, I need practise. And while the daily SoG and Book2 are happening, I need to flex the muscle. And this is a pretty interesting way. No?
The Stories from Mumbai
This idea has been swirling at the back of my head for some months now. I finally found time to write it down! Here it is!
Background
On a recent trip to Helsinki (in Aug 18), I saw this book - People Make The City. On their website, they say its a book "full of stories from the capital’s creative makers and doers. An insiders’ guide for experiencing the local way of life."
And then, on another recent trip to Amsterdam (Oct 18), I saw a similar book. I cant recall the name right now but the idea was same. A collection of stories, ideas, thoughts, photos, places etc that a local at Amsterdam would want to share with other locals.
Both these books were fascinating and had stories that I could never find on a tripadvisor or a Lonely Planet!
And then, on another recent trip to Amsterdam (Oct 18), I saw a similar book. I cant recall the name right now but the idea was same. A collection of stories, ideas, thoughts, photos, places etc that a local at Amsterdam would want to share with other locals.
Both these books were fascinating and had stories that I could never find on a tripadvisor or a Lonely Planet!
And it got me thinking, that we need a similar book for various cities in India. If not all the cities, then for Mumbai, Goa, Bangalore, Jaipur, Agra and Delhi for sure. Thats where most travellers and tourists land up. And the book would do well as a guide, as a companion, as a souvenir, heck as a collection of postcards!
The idea
So, what if we compile and curate a collection of stories from the city of Mumbai (to start with) and make those available in shape of a book?
If not anything else, the book will be a conversation starter.
The book will showcase our city, in a way the city has to be experienced.
The book is an opportunity to connect with the locals.
The book is a great piece or art to have in your home!
Its a great gift to someone new.
Its the perfect take-away for people new to the city.
In one line, the book will help build a community!
How is it different from those hundreds of blogs, websites, books and magazines?
It is not. Those blogs probably do a better job!
The book is not meant to make commercial sense. I dont want to make money with it.
This is a book that I wish to do because I want to experience the cities like the locals. I want to walk down the Marine Drive with one of the locals and listen to her stories of the city. I want to sit at an Irani Cafe and hear the owner reminisce about a time that is gone. I want to be at Shivaji Park and see those hundreds of kids hoping to score hundreds of runs for India. I want to live the life of the hustlers of Versova and experience the agony and the anguish and the ecstasy that they go through as they find their way in Bollywood and someday inspire the very same emotions in their audience. And more. So many more!
In one line, this book is for me!
I want to listen to the stories.
And I want to share these stories with whoever wishes to listen.
That's it!
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
Oh, and no. I dont intend to make money with this. If there are any monetary gains, I pledge to donate those to institutions that work towards making the city a better place.
Ok. How would you go about it?
For starters, I need access to following "types" of people...
A. People who'd want to tell stories of their love for the city.
Because without the stories, there is nothing.
B. People who can enable the book (writers, designers, photographers, printers etc).
Because once I have the stories, I need to bind them into a book!
C. People who may want to read this book.
But since I am assuming that I am the only reader! So this is sorted :)
I know its a tough one. Who would want to write for no expectation of any money? Heck, I dont want to engage anyone if I cant pay them. After all the book is being written for me! And with the kind of money I have, how do I enable this? I dont know. But I will find a way.
What all stories do I want to include?
For the time being, for the Mumbai edition, I am looking for people that love the city of Mumbai. And like the cliche goes, the city must run in their blood. Simple.
The stories must inspire me.
The stories must make me jealous of their relationship with the city!
They may or may not live here.
They may or may not have a story with a twisted arc.
They just need to have a perspective that is worth spending time on.
In fact as I write this, I can think of a few people that fit the bill.
There is this lady on twitter. The posts that she makes about the city of Mumbai, I want to somehow become friends with her and implore her to tell me of what goes into her head when she's taking those pics or writing those words.
There is this person I know who was head of marketing with one of the leading companies in the country and then he quit to start a walking-tours company in Mumbai.
And then there is this junior from college who runs a chain of hostels in Mumbai and Jodhpur!
Apart from these three, I am sure I can get access to scores of people who'd have unique stories to share, unique experiences that a traveller ought to seep in! I just need to find them and get them to help me.
Help me showcase the great city of Mumbai to the ones that are new! Please!
Finally,
What do you think of the idea?
Would you want to read a book like this?
Who all do you think I should approach to work on this book?
How can the book be designed?
What structure could I give to the book?
What could the book be called? I suck at naming things!
Or, is the idea shitty and have been done to death?
I need to get a life?
Whatever. But please do tell me. Comments are open. And I am at Saurabh.
Thank You!
The Daily Grind - 2717 - 230718
So it has happened! After 11 days of non-stop one post a day, I did not post yesterday and the day before. So a break of 2 days. Bummer!
Day before, I could've posted but I did not. There are no excuses. I was plain lazy. I mean I did get stuck at a meeting that never ended and then I had to attend a social gathering and then had to meet a few friends at night, but I did have a few hours in the middle that I could've used to write. But I did not. I know everyone has an active social life and I am not the only one but unlike everyone that I hang out with I am the only one with super high ambitions and unreliable income (#note2self - time to find others to hang out with? people in the similar space as you are?).
Yesterday, I got dragged into a day-long firefighting thing at work. Which is not new. I need to understand why does this happen this often!
Anyhow, its 2205 and I have to leave at 2300 and that leaves me with little less than an hour to get this post done. And unlike previous times where I was hard on myself and I ranted and ranted and all that, this time I am not going to that. PM, are youlistening reading?
I'd rather write about good thing. Things that I am thankful for. Here goes.
A.
There is enough work on my plate that I dont have time to even sleep. This is a good thing because work translates into money. And this money is more than enough to allow me to fund all the projects! Which is THE thing that I want from life. Make a lot of money. Use that create things that give me that satisfaction of creating things. And then repeat. You get the drift?
B.
There is some travel coming up. Even though most of those "trips" are just about a day long and will be super hectic, I am still excited about the prospect of being away from office. Thing is, there are days that I love to sit around and work and all that but for most part, I want to not be confined to a physical space. I infact need to work on things that allow me a life where I can travel constantly. Like a cricketer, you know. Or a poker player!
C.
The Team SG that I've always dreamt of being a part of? That is happening. One person at a time. There are 5 people on it now. The good part? Everyone on the team is less than 30 (except Paras but he's like a 5-year old in the head! The youngest is 19 though). I just need to find a way to keep the team together.
Also, I need to ensure that this does not become an ego trip. At this point, I am very clear that I dont own them. Neither do they report to me. I am not their manager. And I definitely dont own their time. Or idea. Its like that round table that King Arthur apparently had at Camelot. Everyone is equal. Everyone ought to work to help each other. Each person gives a shoulder to others. And so on and so forth. Together we lift each other. And grow the tribe.
I know this is too idealistic to be true but I am sure I can make it happen. You want in? Read this and lets talk! #note2self: Need to write more about this.
D.
The fact that I am back to writing! I know this is little and probably stupid and insignificant that I am writing a blogpost about writing on a blog. But to me, its important. I have realised that writing keeps me sane and grounded and all that. The fact that I am back to the rigour of writing something everyday (apart from longish work-emails) is a great great thing!
***
So yeah, this is about it. Post for the day. After a break of 2 days. Wish me luck for tomorrow!
PS: I need to stop using these many exclamation marks. Really.
Yesterday, I got dragged into a day-long firefighting thing at work. Which is not new. I need to understand why does this happen this often!
Anyhow, its 2205 and I have to leave at 2300 and that leaves me with little less than an hour to get this post done. And unlike previous times where I was hard on myself and I ranted and ranted and all that, this time I am not going to that. PM, are you
I'd rather write about good thing. Things that I am thankful for. Here goes.
A.
There is enough work on my plate that I dont have time to even sleep. This is a good thing because work translates into money. And this money is more than enough to allow me to fund all the projects! Which is THE thing that I want from life. Make a lot of money. Use that create things that give me that satisfaction of creating things. And then repeat. You get the drift?
B.
There is some travel coming up. Even though most of those "trips" are just about a day long and will be super hectic, I am still excited about the prospect of being away from office. Thing is, there are days that I love to sit around and work and all that but for most part, I want to not be confined to a physical space. I infact need to work on things that allow me a life where I can travel constantly. Like a cricketer, you know. Or a poker player!
C.
The Team SG that I've always dreamt of being a part of? That is happening. One person at a time. There are 5 people on it now. The good part? Everyone on the team is less than 30 (except Paras but he's like a 5-year old in the head! The youngest is 19 though). I just need to find a way to keep the team together.
Also, I need to ensure that this does not become an ego trip. At this point, I am very clear that I dont own them. Neither do they report to me. I am not their manager. And I definitely dont own their time. Or idea. Its like that round table that King Arthur apparently had at Camelot. Everyone is equal. Everyone ought to work to help each other. Each person gives a shoulder to others. And so on and so forth. Together we lift each other. And grow the tribe.
I know this is too idealistic to be true but I am sure I can make it happen. You want in? Read this and lets talk! #note2self: Need to write more about this.
D.
The fact that I am back to writing! I know this is little and probably stupid and insignificant that I am writing a blogpost about writing on a blog. But to me, its important. I have realised that writing keeps me sane and grounded and all that. The fact that I am back to the rigour of writing something everyday (apart from longish work-emails) is a great great thing!
***
So yeah, this is about it. Post for the day. After a break of 2 days. Wish me luck for tomorrow!
PS: I need to stop using these many exclamation marks. Really.
QnA with self.
So, on May 07, I went for a walk and I was like on the top of the fucking world. Its been three, four days since I went. Not that I dont want to. I really want to. There is all the intent in the world. What is lacking is the ability. Despite putting multiple alarms and all that, I am unable to wake up on time.
Why not? Is waking up hard? Arent you a morning person?
Thing is waking up has never been a problem for me - I can get by with very little sleep. May be its the age. That its tougher to wake up after you've had a night out.
And why would you have a night out when you are committed to fitness!
Because there are things to be done that are often tough to do during the day!
And what are those things?
Meeting people. I anyway dont meet people that dont add anything to my life. But there are people that I really care for and in case they want to meet, I have to do my bit. And unlike me they don't really have control over their time and thus they can only meet post work.
Plus as I grow the business, I have to meet more people - hoping to learn new things, find contacts, explore things that I am not in the know of etc etc. And when you meet someone for the first time, thanks to our societal conditioning, we dont really "impose" our whims on others. While you are your authentic self, you try to meet at a common ground and establish a rapport. Its a transaction and its tough.
Ok three things. You have control over your time? Whats authenticity? Grow business?
Control over time as in that most days I can choose what I want to work on that day. Of course there are client meetings and things to do and places to be. In most cases I can choose these. I've built my life like that. And of course I've been terribly lucky! You know I dont have that strict 9 to 5 kind of a schedule (while I impose one on myself - I like the discipline) that most others have.
Grow business. You dint know? I am committed to be a dollar millionaire by end of FY18-19. Also I think this is the first time I am articulating this. Have around 10 months to make it happen. Lets see. Do wish me luck.
And authenticity? If there is one business jargon I can make myself understand and use more and more, it is authenticity. It essentially is a combination of your personality, consistency and your deeds. For example, if I say that I love criticism and when someone criticises me, I balk, I am NOT being authentic. You get the drift?
Wow. Thats nice. All the best! Coming back. To running. You sound like yet another AFC - lot of talk, no action. Whats the plan?
Well, the plan is to show up. Try everyday till I succeed. The plan is to do 21 days on the trot. Right now, the longest streak is about 3 days. Need to take it up to 21 And then I think I'll be sorted.
And no, 21 days is NOT habit forming. The real number I think is 66. I mean the jury is out there. I want to take the tough road. 66 it is. 666 for all I care. Right now, I want to do three weeks. And then may be more.
Ok. Good luck with it. Can I ask you for another favor?
Shoot.
How about writing? You know, since I know you well, you sort of enjoy writing. You like the process. And you know that writing helps you connect with more people and makes an impact and a difference and all that.
Ok, I know what you are saying. I will try. Thing is, its about prioritising and saying no. I want to get rich. Its that simple. So, anything that helps me make money, I want to do that and anything that stops me from that, I want to skip. I dont think writing allows me to make money.
Doesnt it? Writing opens doors and gives you access to people. And people are what get things done!
Dont get me started on people. I know I've been lucky but I dont have what it takes to forge deep relationships. Ok I am ranting. Next question.
Fair. And while you are chasing money, what about an enriched life? I mean you could have all the money in the world but if you dont have anyone to share it with, what's the point?
Dude! You dont know me. Remember that unlike the creative ones that come naturally talented, I am the odd one out. I do NOT have a single skill that can be monetised. And neither do I have access to anyone that help me monetise their talent (and allow me to make money in the process).
So, this means that I need to work hard, hustle and do more than anyone else.
I can choose an enriched life. Or I can choose a life of riches. No points for guessing the one I am picking.
Uh ok. If you insist.
No man. I mean it. The world we live in, there is no meaning if you dont have a life of abundance. Of course poor people are happy and they are content with a life of constraints. I just have one question for them. Whatever they are doing, will they not do it better, faster, easier and all that if they had more money?
Money does not buy you happiness but it enables you to do things that give you happiness.
A simple case in point is my control over my time. I can control over large part of my time and I can thus do a lot of things that a lot of my people cant do. Extrapolate this. If I could control every living second, imagine the impact I could have! Imagine the, what is the word you used? Enriched? Imagine how enriched would that life be when you have things in abundance!
Ok. To be honest, I think I've lost you there. And since I am your alter ego, you need to know that I've lost interest. I need to move on. Before I go, can you promise to write everyday? Even if its crap. Can you just publish? PLEASE?
Arey yaar!
Ok I will try. Promise. And I promise that I will go run!
Tomorrow?
Yes!
Thank you!
Thank you!
Why not? Is waking up hard? Arent you a morning person?
Thing is waking up has never been a problem for me - I can get by with very little sleep. May be its the age. That its tougher to wake up after you've had a night out.
And why would you have a night out when you are committed to fitness!
Because there are things to be done that are often tough to do during the day!
And what are those things?
Meeting people. I anyway dont meet people that dont add anything to my life. But there are people that I really care for and in case they want to meet, I have to do my bit. And unlike me they don't really have control over their time and thus they can only meet post work.
Plus as I grow the business, I have to meet more people - hoping to learn new things, find contacts, explore things that I am not in the know of etc etc. And when you meet someone for the first time, thanks to our societal conditioning, we dont really "impose" our whims on others. While you are your authentic self, you try to meet at a common ground and establish a rapport. Its a transaction and its tough.
Ok three things. You have control over your time? Whats authenticity? Grow business?
Control over time as in that most days I can choose what I want to work on that day. Of course there are client meetings and things to do and places to be. In most cases I can choose these. I've built my life like that. And of course I've been terribly lucky! You know I dont have that strict 9 to 5 kind of a schedule (while I impose one on myself - I like the discipline) that most others have.
Grow business. You dint know? I am committed to be a dollar millionaire by end of FY18-19. Also I think this is the first time I am articulating this. Have around 10 months to make it happen. Lets see. Do wish me luck.
And authenticity? If there is one business jargon I can make myself understand and use more and more, it is authenticity. It essentially is a combination of your personality, consistency and your deeds. For example, if I say that I love criticism and when someone criticises me, I balk, I am NOT being authentic. You get the drift?
Wow. Thats nice. All the best! Coming back. To running. You sound like yet another AFC - lot of talk, no action. Whats the plan?
Well, the plan is to show up. Try everyday till I succeed. The plan is to do 21 days on the trot. Right now, the longest streak is about 3 days. Need to take it up to 21 And then I think I'll be sorted.
And no, 21 days is NOT habit forming. The real number I think is 66. I mean the jury is out there. I want to take the tough road. 66 it is. 666 for all I care. Right now, I want to do three weeks. And then may be more.
Ok. Good luck with it. Can I ask you for another favor?
Shoot.
How about writing? You know, since I know you well, you sort of enjoy writing. You like the process. And you know that writing helps you connect with more people and makes an impact and a difference and all that.
Ok, I know what you are saying. I will try. Thing is, its about prioritising and saying no. I want to get rich. Its that simple. So, anything that helps me make money, I want to do that and anything that stops me from that, I want to skip. I dont think writing allows me to make money.
Doesnt it? Writing opens doors and gives you access to people. And people are what get things done!
Dont get me started on people. I know I've been lucky but I dont have what it takes to forge deep relationships. Ok I am ranting. Next question.
Fair. And while you are chasing money, what about an enriched life? I mean you could have all the money in the world but if you dont have anyone to share it with, what's the point?
Dude! You dont know me. Remember that unlike the creative ones that come naturally talented, I am the odd one out. I do NOT have a single skill that can be monetised. And neither do I have access to anyone that help me monetise their talent (and allow me to make money in the process).
So, this means that I need to work hard, hustle and do more than anyone else.
I can choose an enriched life. Or I can choose a life of riches. No points for guessing the one I am picking.
Uh ok. If you insist.
No man. I mean it. The world we live in, there is no meaning if you dont have a life of abundance. Of course poor people are happy and they are content with a life of constraints. I just have one question for them. Whatever they are doing, will they not do it better, faster, easier and all that if they had more money?
Money does not buy you happiness but it enables you to do things that give you happiness.
A simple case in point is my control over my time. I can control over large part of my time and I can thus do a lot of things that a lot of my people cant do. Extrapolate this. If I could control every living second, imagine the impact I could have! Imagine the, what is the word you used? Enriched? Imagine how enriched would that life be when you have things in abundance!
Ok. To be honest, I think I've lost you there. And since I am your alter ego, you need to know that I've lost interest. I need to move on. Before I go, can you promise to write everyday? Even if its crap. Can you just publish? PLEASE?
Arey yaar!
Ok I will try. Promise. And I promise that I will go run!
Tomorrow?
Yes!
Thank you!
Thank you!
W. Writing.
Its April. And that means a new financial year is here. That also means its yet another opportunity to start afresh. For this blog and for my writing, it specifically means that I can try and restart writing and creating. So, I am going to attempt to write a blogpost each day in this month. So 30 posts in the next 30 days. Each will be inspired by a thing that I am grateful (or happy or thankful) about in life. I call this Project 30Posts30DaysChallenge (yes I suck with naming conventions but I get things done).
Here's the post for the day. Starting with W. Couldn't think of anything that starts with A.
W. Writing.
Among all things that I am so so thankful for in life is the ability to write. I may not be able to move mountains with what I write but I do think that I can write well. And unlike those super talented people who write so well that each piece is like a masterpiece, it takes a lot of effort for me to write something that is worth reading. So the only way to writing greatness for me is to write more. And the plan is to write so much that even if 1% of what I write is good enough, there is enough for a my audience to consume.
So yeah, I love to write. And I am thankful that I have some amount of talent that allows me to express. I do wish I were better at it. And its something that can of course improve with practise. Just that on the list of things that I want to do in life, writing is not really up there. I mean if I had all the money in the world, I would travel, teach and write. In that order. And if I had money and / or time left, I would play poker.
Why travel? To enrich myself.
Why teach? To learn more.
Why write? To connect with others.
And what would all these things do me? Allow me to become a better version of myself. And then use that to impact the world. Sigh. High hopes, Mr. Garg.
But then I dont have all the money. And that means I need to invest all the time I have to earn money. Like they said, "you're slave to money and then you die." Oh, the good part is, I am getting there in terms of money. I will have abundant money very soon and then I will put this plan (travel, teach, write, poker) in action.
Meanwhile, coming back to the agenda for the evening - writing.
So writing is such an integral part of me that I can not imagine not writing. I've been writing this blog since Jan of 2014. Thats like 14 years! I dont think I've done anything for longer than that!
Writing has helped me express thoughts well, it has helped me make new friends. It has given me the vain satisfaction of seeing my name in a bookstore. Agreed that tnks is not a bestseller but it is a book nonetheless. May be the next one will be. Or the one after that. May be its delayed because I dont see writing as an avenue that could give me enough to make my ends meet?
Thing is I've never been able to make it commercial - there are no blogging awards, no fans, no regular readers. Its just me and and my echo chamber. And may be thats why its not on the priority? Even if I had some people who'd ask me for an update or tell me that they wait for what I write, I would probably be more motivated. Vivek does. But I need more. And I need strangers. Why? Because like everyone else, I often take my people for granted. No am not crying about it. I would continue to write even if I had no readers. Its something that I do not need external validation for.
Anyhow. The point is, there is certain therapeutic value to writing. Its like pouring your grief, your tears, your sadness and your anger and your heart on paper. And its like leaving streaks of happiness, excitement and everything in between on a blank canvas. Of course it helps if you have the words and ideas that could make others share your grief as well. When the entire thing becomes a shared experience. That probably is when you succeed as a writer. Probably.
So yeah. Thats about it for the time being. Writing. One of the things that I am grateful for. First in the list of 30. I dont know what I'd talk about tomorrow. Lets see. Till then, over n out.
P.S.: If you are reading this, tell me what part of my writing has moved you the most? What can I improve. What can I do more of?
Here's the post for the day. Starting with W. Couldn't think of anything that starts with A.
W. Writing.
Among all things that I am so so thankful for in life is the ability to write. I may not be able to move mountains with what I write but I do think that I can write well. And unlike those super talented people who write so well that each piece is like a masterpiece, it takes a lot of effort for me to write something that is worth reading. So the only way to writing greatness for me is to write more. And the plan is to write so much that even if 1% of what I write is good enough, there is enough for a my audience to consume.
So yeah, I love to write. And I am thankful that I have some amount of talent that allows me to express. I do wish I were better at it. And its something that can of course improve with practise. Just that on the list of things that I want to do in life, writing is not really up there. I mean if I had all the money in the world, I would travel, teach and write. In that order. And if I had money and / or time left, I would play poker.
Why travel? To enrich myself.
Why teach? To learn more.
Why write? To connect with others.
And what would all these things do me? Allow me to become a better version of myself. And then use that to impact the world. Sigh. High hopes, Mr. Garg.
But then I dont have all the money. And that means I need to invest all the time I have to earn money. Like they said, "you're slave to money and then you die." Oh, the good part is, I am getting there in terms of money. I will have abundant money very soon and then I will put this plan (travel, teach, write, poker) in action.
Meanwhile, coming back to the agenda for the evening - writing.
So writing is such an integral part of me that I can not imagine not writing. I've been writing this blog since Jan of 2014. Thats like 14 years! I dont think I've done anything for longer than that!
Writing has helped me express thoughts well, it has helped me make new friends. It has given me the vain satisfaction of seeing my name in a bookstore. Agreed that tnks is not a bestseller but it is a book nonetheless. May be the next one will be. Or the one after that. May be its delayed because I dont see writing as an avenue that could give me enough to make my ends meet?
Thing is I've never been able to make it commercial - there are no blogging awards, no fans, no regular readers. Its just me and and my echo chamber. And may be thats why its not on the priority? Even if I had some people who'd ask me for an update or tell me that they wait for what I write, I would probably be more motivated. Vivek does. But I need more. And I need strangers. Why? Because like everyone else, I often take my people for granted. No am not crying about it. I would continue to write even if I had no readers. Its something that I do not need external validation for.
Anyhow. The point is, there is certain therapeutic value to writing. Its like pouring your grief, your tears, your sadness and your anger and your heart on paper. And its like leaving streaks of happiness, excitement and everything in between on a blank canvas. Of course it helps if you have the words and ideas that could make others share your grief as well. When the entire thing becomes a shared experience. That probably is when you succeed as a writer. Probably.
So yeah. Thats about it for the time being. Writing. One of the things that I am grateful for. First in the list of 30. I dont know what I'd talk about tomorrow. Lets see. Till then, over n out.
P.S.: If you are reading this, tell me what part of my writing has moved you the most? What can I improve. What can I do more of?
The Monday Diary
So its been about 10 days since I published something here. And its been about 20 days since I made a meaningful post. And the "silence" is deafening. So much so that I want to scream at the top of my lungs.
Anyhow. Fuck the poetic shite.
So I have been thinking about the next book for last few days. Thing is, every once in a while someone asks me about the next one and I dont have an answer. Plus I am often at airports (like I was at one yesterday and spotted Sachin's), malls and other such places and I invariably drift towards a book shop and when I see shelves and shelves of books, stacked end up high and people leafing through them and all that, I give in to the weakness and start to pine for the rare, vain and frivolous notion of seeing my name on the bestseller list. While #tnks received generally good reviews, it did not put me on any list. Except it allowed me to tick off a thing from my bucket list.
I really need to give this a shot. I remember I had promised myself that I will write 5 books before I hang myboots pencils. And I've done just one. Need to do more. 4 more at least.
Lemme take a diversion. To avoid some heartburn. To something that's been occupying my head lately. C4E. The day AND night job. Something that I know can make memoney wealth. Something that is right at the intersection of all things that I love. Something that I think believe is my life's purpose.
While what we do is supposed to entertain the world and all that, most days are drab. Not drab as in they are drab for bank-tellers (with all due respect) but drab as things take time to move. And there is movement after days, if not months.
Today was one such day. I got early drafts of a website that we are working on. And I was amazed at the range of emotions that came up when I saw just a computer image of the website. Mind you. Just a photo. Its not a website. Its not a MVP. It does not work at all. And its months away from any revenue or impact. But its a step in the direction.
And not just that one website, I saw a few more things come to fruition. I got the first set of prints for the Art Project (where we wish to empower other artists) in my hand. And they look gorgeous. The short film that I had to work on came out. And they look gorgeous btw. The short film seems to be on track. Little-by-little, step-by-step, brick-by-brick, things that I have envisioned seem to be coming to life. And all these on shoestring budget and just a handful of people. If someone could give me a lever large enough, I could fucking move the Earth! But then, why would someone fund me? They would do it for the money and I cant promise any returns. Hello, reality!
Time for a diversion yet again. The point is, it was a good day. Need to have more of these. The only sad part is that I did not create anything new. If I could change that, I can continue to live the rest of my life exactly like this.
Until next time, over and out.
Anyhow. Fuck the poetic shite.
So I have been thinking about the next book for last few days. Thing is, every once in a while someone asks me about the next one and I dont have an answer. Plus I am often at airports (like I was at one yesterday and spotted Sachin's), malls and other such places and I invariably drift towards a book shop and when I see shelves and shelves of books, stacked end up high and people leafing through them and all that, I give in to the weakness and start to pine for the rare, vain and frivolous notion of seeing my name on the bestseller list. While #tnks received generally good reviews, it did not put me on any list. Except it allowed me to tick off a thing from my bucket list.
I really need to give this a shot. I remember I had promised myself that I will write 5 books before I hang my
Lemme take a diversion. To avoid some heartburn. To something that's been occupying my head lately. C4E. The day AND night job. Something that I know can make me
While what we do is supposed to entertain the world and all that, most days are drab. Not drab as in they are drab for bank-tellers (with all due respect) but drab as things take time to move. And there is movement after days, if not months.
Today was one such day. I got early drafts of a website that we are working on. And I was amazed at the range of emotions that came up when I saw just a computer image of the website. Mind you. Just a photo. Its not a website. Its not a MVP. It does not work at all. And its months away from any revenue or impact. But its a step in the direction.
And not just that one website, I saw a few more things come to fruition. I got the first set of prints for the Art Project (where we wish to empower other artists) in my hand. And they look gorgeous. The short film that I had to work on came out. And they look gorgeous btw. The short film seems to be on track. Little-by-little, step-by-step, brick-by-brick, things that I have envisioned seem to be coming to life. And all these on shoestring budget and just a handful of people. If someone could give me a lever large enough, I could fucking move the Earth! But then, why would someone fund me? They would do it for the money and I cant promise any returns. Hello, reality!
Time for a diversion yet again. The point is, it was a good day. Need to have more of these. The only sad part is that I did not create anything new. If I could change that, I can continue to live the rest of my life exactly like this.
Until next time, over and out.
Help me help people around me...
Among other things that I have planned to do #in2018, I am gonna work on a non-fiction. The idea is to create something that helps the world, allows me to reach more people and achieve financial independence. A win-win-win. Yes there IS a thing like that.
The starting point of all the above, is a non-fiction book. And for the same, I am looking for a research and writing assistant to help me!
What is the book about?
Cant give too many specifics for the time being (because I dont have them to be honest; all of it is WIP). But when it does come out, it will be stocked in either the self-improvement or business & management category at bookstores across the world (not just India). In fact, the first month together will be spent on shortlisting the theme, idea etc.
What I need from you? What "skills" am I looking for?
- Understanding of business. If you have studied marketing, journalism, business reporting, you will be an ideal person to work with.
- Understanding of behavioural sciences. All self-improvement books are essentially about behaviour, decision making and mental models.
- Ability to conduct online research, do background research on people, connect dots (like investigative journalists do) and other similar things that will help us make sense of all the data that we gather.
- Inquisitiveness and innate curiosity about the world around us. What makes people do things they do? Why do companies fail? What makes an underdog beat a Goliath against all odds?
- Handle large quantity of data. This "data" would be things like interviews (that we conduct), research (to back up these interviews), original text (that we write), media (that we will have to consume to work on the book), scratch notes, snippets, thoughts and other things.
- Great command over English language. This means that you are a grammar nazi, you know how to fix a badly written piece of text and you can spot a badly written piece of text from a mile. This is probably the most important bit as my command over language is questionable.
- Some sense of humor. Please. There's just too many serious people around and we can do with some easy going people.
- You would have read a few business, non-fiction and self-improvement books. This means you understand the structure of such books. You also know what is faff and what actually adds value.
- Most importantly, you REALLY want to work on a non-fiction in the self-improvement genre.
You must...
- be is in your mid-twenties. I am sure of this unless you are an anomaly.
- be willing to work 2-3 hours EACH day. No Sundays or weekends. I dont believe in that thing called the work-life balance. My work is my life. I live to work. I work to be able to make lives of people better, if not make a dent in the universe.
- live in Mumbai. You will work from your home / college / office etc. And you will have to meet me once a week for 2-3 hours.
- have access to a computer and Internet.
- know Google suite really well (drive, docs, keep, calendar etc.).
And the most important of them all. What's in it for you?
- Stipend. I can pay upto Rs. 5K per month. For the duration that we work together. I estimate this to be a 6-month long engagement. If 5k a month is too less for you, I promise that I will give you all the royalty I make for the first 5 years. No conditions. Serious about this.
- Credits in the book. As an assistant for sure. And in case you and I click, may be as a co-author. How cool will it be to have written and published a book in your name?
- Learning. The book will help people become better (yes, you are staring at a man who wants to be yet another self-improvement and personal productivity guru). And while the ambition is to write a book that helps people, the very process of writing the book will help you as well. Plus I am a great mentor. I am. Trust me!
In short, I am looking at a Superman / Superwoman. To push me to do well. And make the world a better place. I know I cant do this alone. And I need help. Are you the one?
P.S.: Found any typos in this post?
Book 2. Zinda Hai.
For a millionth time, today I started working on #book2. Its been pending for a long time and while nothing has changed, there have been a few triggers.
Here's a list.
a. A friend thought that I am suicidal and sent me a copy of The Myth of Sisyphus.
I am not sure if I am / was suicidal or not but after I read the first 3 pages I felt that life was absurd and I ought to end it. Also, I recently moved to an Android phone (which is a suicide in itself) and I have spent last three hours searching for the Blue Whale.
But since a friend gifted the book and I had to respect the 250 bucks he spent on it, I went online and saw this video (that summarized the book in 7 minutes and took me closer to suicide). The video talked about how we must find pleasure in misery and why its absurd to even think of suicide. It did talk of more things but I am sure if I could comprehend it. So, left it at that.
Here's a tip. Avoid the fucking book at all costs. And if you want to read a book that prevents from you committing suicide, do read Reasons to Stay Alive. I read it when I was not suicidal and it was one of the best reads ever.
But then coming back to the context, book2, somewhere while I was either reading the book or watching the video, I felt that I ought to write. Ergo.
b. I read this piece on BBC where they try and postulate who will be remembered after a 1000 years after they are gone.
Thing is, I've never known if I want fame or whatever but I would love to be known 1000 years after I am gone. And the article says that either I need to become a famous villain or die a famous death. I cant control how I'd die but I can create a villain that is more villainous than anyone ever alive? Et tu, Brute?
And to be able to create a Brutus, a Joker, I need to write!
c. Pochu Prasad. Poch was my roommate at MDI. It was his daughter's birthday recently and when I messaged him after 3 years (thinking that its a good pretext to text long lost friends on their kids' birthdays), the first thing he asked was, "when's the next book coming out."
After I abused him and all that it left me thinking. That my identity is now of someone who's written a book. And while I am not a one-hit wonder (book was NOT a hit), may be there's something there!
d. Parijat sent me this.
This is screenshot of Syd's book and it reminded me that writing is my personal responsibility. And its high time I worked on it. I can cry about lack of a silver spoon us my ass but I do have a tiny gift with whatever I write. I ought to use it. No?
e. A discussion with a colleague reminded me that I am insignificant and for 35 years of my life, I have shit to show for. More than anything else, I am offended by it and I take it as a personal insult. And I will damn prove the dude wrong. I will achieve something large in my life. Of course I will continue to chase my ambition of climbing the Mt. Everest, impacting a billion lives and making a billion dollars in the process. But I will do well with my writing. You guys wait and watch. Ego makes you do funny things man.
So yeah. That's about it. More on this later. Right now I have a book to write. And you may want to order the first one here.
Here's a list.
a. A friend thought that I am suicidal and sent me a copy of The Myth of Sisyphus.
I am not sure if I am / was suicidal or not but after I read the first 3 pages I felt that life was absurd and I ought to end it. Also, I recently moved to an Android phone (which is a suicide in itself) and I have spent last three hours searching for the Blue Whale.
But since a friend gifted the book and I had to respect the 250 bucks he spent on it, I went online and saw this video (that summarized the book in 7 minutes and took me closer to suicide). The video talked about how we must find pleasure in misery and why its absurd to even think of suicide. It did talk of more things but I am sure if I could comprehend it. So, left it at that.
Here's a tip. Avoid the fucking book at all costs. And if you want to read a book that prevents from you committing suicide, do read Reasons to Stay Alive. I read it when I was not suicidal and it was one of the best reads ever.
But then coming back to the context, book2, somewhere while I was either reading the book or watching the video, I felt that I ought to write. Ergo.
b. I read this piece on BBC where they try and postulate who will be remembered after a 1000 years after they are gone.
Thing is, I've never known if I want fame or whatever but I would love to be known 1000 years after I am gone. And the article says that either I need to become a famous villain or die a famous death. I cant control how I'd die but I can create a villain that is more villainous than anyone ever alive? Et tu, Brute?
And to be able to create a Brutus, a Joker, I need to write!
c. Pochu Prasad. Poch was my roommate at MDI. It was his daughter's birthday recently and when I messaged him after 3 years (thinking that its a good pretext to text long lost friends on their kids' birthdays), the first thing he asked was, "when's the next book coming out."
After I abused him and all that it left me thinking. That my identity is now of someone who's written a book. And while I am not a one-hit wonder (book was NOT a hit), may be there's something there!
d. Parijat sent me this.
This is screenshot of Syd's book and it reminded me that writing is my personal responsibility. And its high time I worked on it. I can cry about lack of a silver spoon us my ass but I do have a tiny gift with whatever I write. I ought to use it. No?
e. A discussion with a colleague reminded me that I am insignificant and for 35 years of my life, I have shit to show for. More than anything else, I am offended by it and I take it as a personal insult. And I will damn prove the dude wrong. I will achieve something large in my life. Of course I will continue to chase my ambition of climbing the Mt. Everest, impacting a billion lives and making a billion dollars in the process. But I will do well with my writing. You guys wait and watch. Ego makes you do funny things man.
So yeah. That's about it. More on this later. Right now I have a book to write. And you may want to order the first one here.
Day 2. Oct 2017.
So, after a mammoth post yesterday (that took me a few days to write), its time to write one that is tad light-hearted. And while I was thinking of ideas to write on, I thought, why not write some words for #book2? Incidentally, #tnks started like a blogpost. Here goes.
If Purav wasnt howling his lungs out at the dead body of Birju, the cops could've never ended the 30-year long run of the fearsome Danveer Karna Sevak Gang. Unlike their name, that meant servants to the mythological figure of Karna, they weren't really servants per se. They were merely a group of 5 thugs, notorious for stealing precious artifacts from museums, temples and palaces and selling them off to collectors. Amongst known list of robberies to their credit, the big ones included the Royal Crown of The Nizam of Golconda, original paintings from the time of Akbar from Itimad-ud-Daulah’s tomb near Agra, Sword of Ibrahim Lodhi from a museum in Delhi, statue of Shiva from the little known Rameswara Siva Temple at Kolkata and more.
The modus operandi was very simple. 5 of them will shortlist a target, often handed over to them by their contact. They would do an extensive research to understand the security arrangements and strike when no one would expect them to. And once they had stolen what they wanted to, they would part ways and lay low for months. Once the heat on the case was gone, they would regroup, often at Sehore, about 40 KMs from Bhopal. Partly because it was bang in the middle of the country and partly because Birju, the leader of the gang was a priest at the one of the hundreds temples in the district. Plus, it was nondescript enough to not warrant any additional attention to the gang when they did meet. Of course there was the curious case of these strangers walking into the temples once every few months and Birju Dada, as he was fondly called, disappearing for a few days. But back in small town India, such occurrences could be easily explained by dismissing these travels as side effect of having a large family.
After stealing this 14th century Bible from a church in Goa, they had decided to again part ways, with Birju taking the loot with him and regroup at Sehore after 4 months. If there was a change in plan, Birju would publish a specific obituary in Delhi, Mumbai and Kolkatta editions of the largest newspaper, Nai Duniya and mention date and time for the prayer meeting. You just had to apply a small cipher to know of the exact date on which you were expected in Sehore. Thing with obituaries is that while people read it with interest and take a note of the long list of apparently grieving family members no one really pays any attention to who had died.
When the last obit carried the photograph of Birju himself, the gang had a hearty laugh when they were together. Birju had said that he was out of his collection of stock images and was too lazy to get more photos from the local photographer. Little did he know that he was going to be this accurate!
***
Thats about it. For some reason I cant get more than 500 words but at least I've put something up. Like Seth said yesterday,
If Purav wasnt howling his lungs out at the dead body of Birju, the cops could've never ended the 30-year long run of the fearsome Danveer Karna Sevak Gang. Unlike their name, that meant servants to the mythological figure of Karna, they weren't really servants per se. They were merely a group of 5 thugs, notorious for stealing precious artifacts from museums, temples and palaces and selling them off to collectors. Amongst known list of robberies to their credit, the big ones included the Royal Crown of The Nizam of Golconda, original paintings from the time of Akbar from Itimad-ud-Daulah’s tomb near Agra, Sword of Ibrahim Lodhi from a museum in Delhi, statue of Shiva from the little known Rameswara Siva Temple at Kolkata and more.
The modus operandi was very simple. 5 of them will shortlist a target, often handed over to them by their contact. They would do an extensive research to understand the security arrangements and strike when no one would expect them to. And once they had stolen what they wanted to, they would part ways and lay low for months. Once the heat on the case was gone, they would regroup, often at Sehore, about 40 KMs from Bhopal. Partly because it was bang in the middle of the country and partly because Birju, the leader of the gang was a priest at the one of the hundreds temples in the district. Plus, it was nondescript enough to not warrant any additional attention to the gang when they did meet. Of course there was the curious case of these strangers walking into the temples once every few months and Birju Dada, as he was fondly called, disappearing for a few days. But back in small town India, such occurrences could be easily explained by dismissing these travels as side effect of having a large family.
After stealing this 14th century Bible from a church in Goa, they had decided to again part ways, with Birju taking the loot with him and regroup at Sehore after 4 months. If there was a change in plan, Birju would publish a specific obituary in Delhi, Mumbai and Kolkatta editions of the largest newspaper, Nai Duniya and mention date and time for the prayer meeting. You just had to apply a small cipher to know of the exact date on which you were expected in Sehore. Thing with obituaries is that while people read it with interest and take a note of the long list of apparently grieving family members no one really pays any attention to who had died.
When the last obit carried the photograph of Birju himself, the gang had a hearty laugh when they were together. Birju had said that he was out of his collection of stock images and was too lazy to get more photos from the local photographer. Little did he know that he was going to be this accurate!
***
Thats about it. For some reason I cant get more than 500 words but at least I've put something up. Like Seth said yesterday,
Thank you, Seth. For this. pic.twitter.com/tdm58pgtDF— SG (@saurabh) October 2, 2017
Your first book!
In short, here's an offer (that hopefully you can't refuse). Hire me as your writing coach and I will ensure that your book is done in less than 6 months. Email me at saurabh.garg@gmail.com and we'd take it from there.
The longform.
Writing The Nidhi Kapoor Story was probably the toughest thing that I've ever done in life (may be except enduring 10 days at a Vipassana camp). And though it was not a sell-out per se, the fruits were as satisfying as any other. When I held the preview copies in my hand, I was literally in tears. And as luck would have it, Vivek had come over for some reason and helped me give the first copies to #sgMS and him. I am digressing. But thing is, writing a book is up there in terms of opening restaurants, traveling the world et al on the bucket lists.
And the experience is / was so superlative that I want to help others get to it. Its not that difficult.
So here is an opportunity to work with me while you work on your book.
What can you expect?
I am not the best when it comes to grammar or literature. I am not even half good when it comes to plotting. But I know what I am great at - getting things done. Reliability. Ensuring that I meet the deadlines. Getting the thing out of the door.
I will use some of the tools that I use to manage two very small businesses. And trust me, the tools work. May be someday I will write a book about how to use project management tools to work on a creative project - like writing a book. May be not. The point is, I know how to get a book done and I want to help.
Actually it's no rocket science. It all boils down to merely showing up. And on persistence. Andwriting the next word laying the next brick. That's about it. More when we sit together to work on your book.
Please be warned that I can't help you with the art (the story, storytelling etc) and I obviously can't help you with craft (the language etc). But I can help you by nudging you in the direction. Think of me as a writing coach. If this is any assurance, three different authors have included my name in acknowledgements pages of their book(s). Of course they are being generous - I did not help them write their books per se. But I figure I must have done something to deserve the honour. How about you put my name in yours?
Is my time free?
No it is not. You have to pay a one-time "donation" of Rs. 5000 for it. No, not to me. You need to give the money to your favorite charity. And share the receipt with me. If you can't afford 5K, email me and let's talk about it.
Why am I doing this?
I want to giveback. Simple.
Deadline?
No deadline. I am going to accept 5 authors / books. As soon as I get 5, I will close this. And then I shall see how it goes.
So that's it! Help me help you. Help me grow as an author. And like Steve said,
The longform.
Writing The Nidhi Kapoor Story was probably the toughest thing that I've ever done in life (may be except enduring 10 days at a Vipassana camp). And though it was not a sell-out per se, the fruits were as satisfying as any other. When I held the preview copies in my hand, I was literally in tears. And as luck would have it, Vivek had come over for some reason and helped me give the first copies to #sgMS and him. I am digressing. But thing is, writing a book is up there in terms of opening restaurants, traveling the world et al on the bucket lists.
And the experience is / was so superlative that I want to help others get to it. Its not that difficult.
So here is an opportunity to work with me while you work on your book.
What can you expect?
I am not the best when it comes to grammar or literature. I am not even half good when it comes to plotting. But I know what I am great at - getting things done. Reliability. Ensuring that I meet the deadlines. Getting the thing out of the door.
I will use some of the tools that I use to manage two very small businesses. And trust me, the tools work. May be someday I will write a book about how to use project management tools to work on a creative project - like writing a book. May be not. The point is, I know how to get a book done and I want to help.
Actually it's no rocket science. It all boils down to merely showing up. And on persistence. And
Please be warned that I can't help you with the art (the story, storytelling etc) and I obviously can't help you with craft (the language etc). But I can help you by nudging you in the direction. Think of me as a writing coach. If this is any assurance, three different authors have included my name in acknowledgements pages of their book(s). Of course they are being generous - I did not help them write their books per se. But I figure I must have done something to deserve the honour. How about you put my name in yours?
Is my time free?
No it is not. You have to pay a one-time "donation" of Rs. 5000 for it. No, not to me. You need to give the money to your favorite charity. And share the receipt with me. If you can't afford 5K, email me and let's talk about it.
Why am I doing this?
I want to giveback. Simple.
Deadline?
No deadline. I am going to accept 5 authors / books. As soon as I get 5, I will close this. And then I shall see how it goes.
So that's it! Help me help you. Help me grow as an author. And like Steve said,
Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
So ladies and gents, the time we have is limited. Life is a wonderful gift and you never know when it's going to get taken away from us. And thus we ought to live it up. We ought to do things. We ought to do them now.
The book can not wait. Let's work on it. Now.
The book can not wait. Let's work on it. Now.
Long time...
So the last post on this blog was on Mar 25. And today its Apr 17. Been some 20 days since I've written something. Wow. This has to be amongst the longest dry stretches of inactivity as a writer.
Universe has funny ways of sending signals. I haven't written anything in a while (almost 20 days I think - last post was on Mar 25 and today is Apr 17) and just when I was getting comfortable about the idea of NOT writing, someone sent a great review of #tnks. And another mini-crush asked me to write - apparently she loves how I write.
So maybe, I ought to write. While book2 is a longer plan, today is as good an opportunity I would get to write as any other day, so here I am. On one of my freewriting things.
P.S.: Freewriting is where I just pour out whatever is in my head, without worrying about the output or quality. And anyhow I have always been about quantity and not quality - I assume that if I continue to write for years (been 12 already), someday I will become a good writer. Remember the infinite monkey theorem - just that my time is very very limited.
Let me think about a few reasons why I couldn't write the last fewdays weeks months.
I can think of two things only. A, work. B, sgMS.
Let me take up work bit in a bit and tackle the issue of sgMS. If you know me, you'd know about her. And trust me she is the most beautiful thing to have happened to me. This ladies and gents is the last time I am talking about her on a public platform (apart from tweets on @altSG, book2 and the secret book I am writing for her - as and when I get time to work on it). I know thislove obsession(?) is not healthy. I know that even though she's been sent for me, she doesn't want me around. So thinking about her, even in my head is not being on the right side of karma. It tilts the balance. And as I grow older, everything IS about tilting balance. So I have to stop doing that. I have to let go of her (as if I had her in the first place - wishful thinking Mr. Garg). I have to move on. Let me attempt to do so umpteenth time.
Dear sgMS, I love you and will hopefully continue to do so for the rest of my life. If you want me back, I will be waiting. Of course if you need something, I am a phone call away!
Moving on. To work.
Life has been REALLY kind and I can't emphasize more on "really." Compared year-on-year I've done 3x better. This year was the first time in my life when I made 7 figures in a year by myself. So, hopefully, the first million is not far.
Of course I have been extremely lucky with things. I know for a fact that I am not the best at what I do but I know that I am willing to work harder than anyone else. And that I think has paid. Coupled with luck of course.
However, while the money has happened, impact hasn't. And more I think, more I realize that I want to be able to impact things. Not at a small level but at the world-changing level. Am I wired for that? I dont know. But I want to do it. I dont know the how but I will. More on this in a bit.
On the work front, I created a new business (I consult clients on digital marketing and brand planning) and I got lucky with a few clients to help me get it off the ground. And I got support from few people who put their faith in me. More about it is at sowhatif.in. The website is still under development. I ought to thank them there. Apart from the regularpeople angels that have helped me over life (ghar ki murgi daal barabar) thank you Rishi, Shail Sir and team, Mahesh Sir, Sonam, Anju, Simit, Stylior team.
The other big thing with work is that I am setting up an events agency with a partner. I've been working for him for close to an year and he has shown faith in me and given me confidence to start something with him as a partner. And I am very excited. Details are sketchy to be honest right now and I will talk about it as I go along. But its events (something I love), backed with experience (of the new partner) and the general feel good about how things are going with me. Hope it does well. I aim to do 10 cr in the next three years. Wish me luck. Please.
So, apart from work, I have been thinking a lot about other things. I dont really have any clear ideas or directions but I think I know where I want to go. I love it when I can help someone (what did Freud say about people who like to help others? anyone?). And when I create impact (though my "impact" has been pretty limited but I would want it to grow). So may be, my life goal, my purpose is to do that. I dont know the why but I know the what for sure. More on this as I go along. And yes, this is like the 1232324th purpose that I have identified for myself. And no, this is not about creating a NGO.
I've also been getting some health scares. The hernia has started to hurt back. I get palpitations around my chest multiple times a day. At my age, heart is the single most important organ and I have to go see a doc but I dont have the time. Or may be I am too scared? I anyway dont like hospitals - I dont have a single happy memory of hospitals. May be this week? Lets see.
Let me sum the other insignificant things in one para. I restarted yoga. And then stopped again after one class. Hope to be regular from Tuesday onwards. I practise with Shameem and she is amazing! I stopped being a teetotaler. On insistence of friends, I started experimenting with beer. And no, I dont like the feeling. I dont want to. So I am going to go back to being a teetotaler again. I remain committed to climbing the Everest by 2025 and run a marathon before that. Here is a list of my life goals. Its good to revisit the list once in a while. It tells you that you are not cool enough and you ought to push yourself.
Another thing that has happened in the past 20 days is that I've got hooked onto Netflix. I have been netflix and chilling with self lately and it's not that bad to be with self. Of course I enjoy company and I love people and all that. However I suck at meeting new people and hence I dont really have an opportunity to break the netflix addiction. I am going to work on it as I go along, here on.
So, yeah this is about it. When I look back at this post, 20 days seem to mean little. Life is like that. I just passed by. Ought to live it up. Enrich every minute, moment and live it to the fullest. I am glad that I have had the opportunity to attempt that. And I am trying to.
Lets see what the next post is about. And more importantly, when that happens!
Universe has funny ways of sending signals. I haven't written anything in a while (almost 20 days I think - last post was on Mar 25 and today is Apr 17) and just when I was getting comfortable about the idea of NOT writing, someone sent a great review of #tnks. And another mini-crush asked me to write - apparently she loves how I write.
P.S.: Freewriting is where I just pour out whatever is in my head, without worrying about the output or quality. And anyhow I have always been about quantity and not quality - I assume that if I continue to write for years (been 12 already), someday I will become a good writer. Remember the infinite monkey theorem - just that my time is very very limited.
Let me think about a few reasons why I couldn't write the last few
I can think of two things only. A, work. B, sgMS.
Let me take up work bit in a bit and tackle the issue of sgMS. If you know me, you'd know about her. And trust me she is the most beautiful thing to have happened to me. This ladies and gents is the last time I am talking about her on a public platform (apart from tweets on @altSG, book2 and the secret book I am writing for her - as and when I get time to work on it). I know this
Dear sgMS, I love you and will hopefully continue to do so for the rest of my life. If you want me back, I will be waiting. Of course if you need something, I am a phone call away!
Moving on. To work.
Life has been REALLY kind and I can't emphasize more on "really." Compared year-on-year I've done 3x better. This year was the first time in my life when I made 7 figures in a year by myself. So, hopefully, the first million is not far.
Of course I have been extremely lucky with things. I know for a fact that I am not the best at what I do but I know that I am willing to work harder than anyone else. And that I think has paid. Coupled with luck of course.
However, while the money has happened, impact hasn't. And more I think, more I realize that I want to be able to impact things. Not at a small level but at the world-changing level. Am I wired for that? I dont know. But I want to do it. I dont know the how but I will. More on this in a bit.
On the work front, I created a new business (I consult clients on digital marketing and brand planning) and I got lucky with a few clients to help me get it off the ground. And I got support from few people who put their faith in me. More about it is at sowhatif.in. The website is still under development. I ought to thank them there. Apart from the regular
The other big thing with work is that I am setting up an events agency with a partner. I've been working for him for close to an year and he has shown faith in me and given me confidence to start something with him as a partner. And I am very excited. Details are sketchy to be honest right now and I will talk about it as I go along. But its events (something I love), backed with experience (of the new partner) and the general feel good about how things are going with me. Hope it does well. I aim to do 10 cr in the next three years. Wish me luck. Please.
So, apart from work, I have been thinking a lot about other things. I dont really have any clear ideas or directions but I think I know where I want to go. I love it when I can help someone (what did Freud say about people who like to help others? anyone?). And when I create impact (though my "impact" has been pretty limited but I would want it to grow). So may be, my life goal, my purpose is to do that. I dont know the why but I know the what for sure. More on this as I go along. And yes, this is like the 1232324th purpose that I have identified for myself. And no, this is not about creating a NGO.
I've also been getting some health scares. The hernia has started to hurt back. I get palpitations around my chest multiple times a day. At my age, heart is the single most important organ and I have to go see a doc but I dont have the time. Or may be I am too scared? I anyway dont like hospitals - I dont have a single happy memory of hospitals. May be this week? Lets see.
Let me sum the other insignificant things in one para. I restarted yoga. And then stopped again after one class. Hope to be regular from Tuesday onwards. I practise with Shameem and she is amazing! I stopped being a teetotaler. On insistence of friends, I started experimenting with beer. And no, I dont like the feeling. I dont want to. So I am going to go back to being a teetotaler again. I remain committed to climbing the Everest by 2025 and run a marathon before that. Here is a list of my life goals. Its good to revisit the list once in a while. It tells you that you are not cool enough and you ought to push yourself.
Another thing that has happened in the past 20 days is that I've got hooked onto Netflix. I have been netflix and chilling with self lately and it's not that bad to be with self. Of course I enjoy company and I love people and all that. However I suck at meeting new people and hence I dont really have an opportunity to break the netflix addiction. I am going to work on it as I go along, here on.
So, yeah this is about it. When I look back at this post, 20 days seem to mean little. Life is like that. I just passed by. Ought to live it up. Enrich every minute, moment and live it to the fullest. I am glad that I have had the opportunity to attempt that. And I am trying to.
Lets see what the next post is about. And more importantly, when that happens!
On the clock
Here is a new experiment. I will write for the next 24 or so minutes. I will not think about what I write. I will not edit what I write. I will not proof read. I will not do a grammar check. I will not do any "post production." I will post.
I will use http://e.ggtimer.com/25minutes to track 25 minutes. Starting now...!
So why this experiment? Because I havent written anything in a long time. I mean I have written but that's been work related writing. Next to negligible (if there is a word like that) for recreation. And come to think of it, I really really love writing. I may not be great at it but I love it. It allows me to express what I cant often speak out loud. It makes me research things. It makes me put things in perspective. It gives my thoughts a structure and a flow. And I get in the other flow - the one that you get in when you are totally immersed in a task. When I write, my writers block, my pseudo depression goes away. I am in the moment. I am in the zone. I feel alive. I am not lethargic. I am not lazy. I dont think of anyone else. May be I do think about #sgMS but not anymore.
As I write, to accompany is some music by RD Burman in the background. Streaming on youtube. The phone is one the night mode. So apart from people in the favorites list I will not get any phone calls. And anyhow who is going to call me? I spoke to my sis already during the day. I am meeting Neo for dinner. My parents have now adjusted to my bouts of absence. And I just finished whatever little work I had on my plate. Of course I have to make some phone calls to get people to do their bit of work. Which they may or may not have done. But I will still have to remind them.
Wait. The track got over. I need to click on a new track. Back in a second.
Back. A quick glance at Eggtimer tells me that I have 20 odd minutes left. Another thing that I would want to do at the end of this excercise is that I would like to know my speed. I would copy paste this post into word and see how many words I typed. Why? I dont know. I have this thing for random data. Like for example, do you know of the Golden Ratio (I shall resist the urge to insert the hyperlink to the Wikipedia article on Golden Ratio, since I am on the clock)? The ratio of 1:1.6? Its insane. And then do you know of the numbers of playing cards? There are 52 cards. There are 52 weeks. There are 4 suits. There are 4 seasons. The total of the face value of all cards is 364. Etc. I love numbers. Just that I am not cool enough to chase my love for mathematics and dive deep in to it. For that matter I dont think I can deep dive into anything. I love being the jack of all trades. And I want to continue to be that. I recently read somewhere that its easy to learn about 70% of any discipline. And from there on, the journey gets tough. So most people would get easily to about 70% of any discipline that they choose. But only a few go beyond that 70%. And that's why we see a few people rise to top while most struggle in mediocrity. I think I have been blessesd that I "get" upto 70% of most things without putting too much effort. This ability allows me to straddle across disciplines. But the lack of expertise in any one stops me from making that impact.
Impact. Damn the word. And damn this guys called Hugh (runs the popular GapingVoid blog - he has been posting things about doing "things that matter" for last few days - again resisting the urge to post link). Wait the song got over. Lemme switch the next one.
I have 13 minutes left. So I wrote for some 7 minutes. More than my ability to concentrate, it was the track that was in the background. The track that I put on now is about 5 minutes long. So the next break will happen when I have 8 minutes left. Ok.
So I was talking about impact. Blame on the universe conspiring (I tweeted about it yesterday, or may be day before). I sincerely believe now that universe does conspire. There are a million examples in front of me. When you want something really bad, you actually get it. Not that I have got what I want (what do I want? simple - money, freedom, opportunity, love, travel). But I am seeing signs of things coming to me. I mean who would have thunk that I would be making my ends meet without having to hold a regular job? Of course I am working harder than a regular employee but I am happy. I can control my time. I can choose what to work on. I can get away from dirty work (P.S.: I think no work is dirty. More on this in some other post).
Ok I am now scratching my head. I think I am stuck. But I shall continue to write. So apart from impact the other thing I chase is making a difference in the lives of people who make me a part of their lives. I love it when I can help people learn things. I may not be the teacher per se. I could merely be someone that triggers something in their head that makes them chase some knowledge. I could be the conduit. I could be the catalyst. I could be that bottom most step on a ladder that helps people rise. And shine.
Wait. Time to change the track. 7 mins, 50 seconds to go. And 19% battery on the laptop. Brb.
Back. I put a 5 minute lone song. Main Koi Aisa Geet from the movie Yes Boss. I shall not post a link. I love the song. So so much. For a ton of reasons. Its SRK. Its a cute love story. Its about making someone you love happy. Its about you being that jester that exists only to make other people laugh, smile and be happy. In an alternate universe I could be a jester, if I could choose. I mean I want to be one in this life as well. But I lack the balls that it takes to try and make other people smile. No wonder I like being part of the entertainment industry. Well, not a part. But at least the fringes. May be, just may be, the meaning of my life is to be that jester? And use my [questionable] understanding of various disciplines to create something that makes people happy? Even if that happiness is for a fleeting moment? May be that's what the universe is trying to tell me all along? May be thats my purpose?
Oh purpose! I have had long discussions with two of my gurus over the last few days. Again, I shall not post links but the gurus are RG and KG. Both are a part of the communication industry and whatever little financial security I have now is because of these two. And because of HG and VK. Wait I am digressing. But thats ok. I am not getting any points for staying on track. The points are to be awarded for continuing to write. Which I am thankfully doing.
Another thing that I could talk is the ongoing shit on my head about my advancing age. It actually happens around this time of the year, every year. And I dont know what to do about it. Wait. Time to change track. Probably the last track. I have a minute and 40 seconds left to go.
Back. The next is Chaand Taare Tod Laaon. Again, a track that I love. It is all about ambition and all that. Something that I can totally relate to. Anyhow. A thought struck me. Do I want to write for 25 more minutes? I thought as I wrote and the answer is... No!
Why not? If I like writing so much?
Damn the buzzer just rang. Time's up!
More later!
So I am done.
I am not editing anything. I am not adding links. I am not correcting grammar. I am not formatting it any different. I am not touching the bit I wrote. If you are a psychologist, may be you want to do an analysis?
And as I was adding labels (read tags) to this post, I realized that I just did a session of free writing. Sounds interesting. Will explore. Until next time, over and out. And a random number fyi, I wrote about 1300 words, excluding this and the note on the top. Which is not bad, if you ask me!
 |
| Screencap of an http://e.ggtimer.com/25minutes screen. |
I will use http://e.ggtimer.com/25minutes to track 25 minutes. Starting now...!
So why this experiment? Because I havent written anything in a long time. I mean I have written but that's been work related writing. Next to negligible (if there is a word like that) for recreation. And come to think of it, I really really love writing. I may not be great at it but I love it. It allows me to express what I cant often speak out loud. It makes me research things. It makes me put things in perspective. It gives my thoughts a structure and a flow. And I get in the other flow - the one that you get in when you are totally immersed in a task. When I write, my writers block, my pseudo depression goes away. I am in the moment. I am in the zone. I feel alive. I am not lethargic. I am not lazy. I dont think of anyone else. May be I do think about #sgMS but not anymore.
As I write, to accompany is some music by RD Burman in the background. Streaming on youtube. The phone is one the night mode. So apart from people in the favorites list I will not get any phone calls. And anyhow who is going to call me? I spoke to my sis already during the day. I am meeting Neo for dinner. My parents have now adjusted to my bouts of absence. And I just finished whatever little work I had on my plate. Of course I have to make some phone calls to get people to do their bit of work. Which they may or may not have done. But I will still have to remind them.
Wait. The track got over. I need to click on a new track. Back in a second.
Back. A quick glance at Eggtimer tells me that I have 20 odd minutes left. Another thing that I would want to do at the end of this excercise is that I would like to know my speed. I would copy paste this post into word and see how many words I typed. Why? I dont know. I have this thing for random data. Like for example, do you know of the Golden Ratio (I shall resist the urge to insert the hyperlink to the Wikipedia article on Golden Ratio, since I am on the clock)? The ratio of 1:1.6? Its insane. And then do you know of the numbers of playing cards? There are 52 cards. There are 52 weeks. There are 4 suits. There are 4 seasons. The total of the face value of all cards is 364. Etc. I love numbers. Just that I am not cool enough to chase my love for mathematics and dive deep in to it. For that matter I dont think I can deep dive into anything. I love being the jack of all trades. And I want to continue to be that. I recently read somewhere that its easy to learn about 70% of any discipline. And from there on, the journey gets tough. So most people would get easily to about 70% of any discipline that they choose. But only a few go beyond that 70%. And that's why we see a few people rise to top while most struggle in mediocrity. I think I have been blessesd that I "get" upto 70% of most things without putting too much effort. This ability allows me to straddle across disciplines. But the lack of expertise in any one stops me from making that impact.
Impact. Damn the word. And damn this guys called Hugh (runs the popular GapingVoid blog - he has been posting things about doing "things that matter" for last few days - again resisting the urge to post link). Wait the song got over. Lemme switch the next one.
I have 13 minutes left. So I wrote for some 7 minutes. More than my ability to concentrate, it was the track that was in the background. The track that I put on now is about 5 minutes long. So the next break will happen when I have 8 minutes left. Ok.
So I was talking about impact. Blame on the universe conspiring (I tweeted about it yesterday, or may be day before). I sincerely believe now that universe does conspire. There are a million examples in front of me. When you want something really bad, you actually get it. Not that I have got what I want (what do I want? simple - money, freedom, opportunity, love, travel). But I am seeing signs of things coming to me. I mean who would have thunk that I would be making my ends meet without having to hold a regular job? Of course I am working harder than a regular employee but I am happy. I can control my time. I can choose what to work on. I can get away from dirty work (P.S.: I think no work is dirty. More on this in some other post).
Ok I am now scratching my head. I think I am stuck. But I shall continue to write. So apart from impact the other thing I chase is making a difference in the lives of people who make me a part of their lives. I love it when I can help people learn things. I may not be the teacher per se. I could merely be someone that triggers something in their head that makes them chase some knowledge. I could be the conduit. I could be the catalyst. I could be that bottom most step on a ladder that helps people rise. And shine.
Wait. Time to change the track. 7 mins, 50 seconds to go. And 19% battery on the laptop. Brb.
Back. I put a 5 minute lone song. Main Koi Aisa Geet from the movie Yes Boss. I shall not post a link. I love the song. So so much. For a ton of reasons. Its SRK. Its a cute love story. Its about making someone you love happy. Its about you being that jester that exists only to make other people laugh, smile and be happy. In an alternate universe I could be a jester, if I could choose. I mean I want to be one in this life as well. But I lack the balls that it takes to try and make other people smile. No wonder I like being part of the entertainment industry. Well, not a part. But at least the fringes. May be, just may be, the meaning of my life is to be that jester? And use my [questionable] understanding of various disciplines to create something that makes people happy? Even if that happiness is for a fleeting moment? May be that's what the universe is trying to tell me all along? May be thats my purpose?
Oh purpose! I have had long discussions with two of my gurus over the last few days. Again, I shall not post links but the gurus are RG and KG. Both are a part of the communication industry and whatever little financial security I have now is because of these two. And because of HG and VK. Wait I am digressing. But thats ok. I am not getting any points for staying on track. The points are to be awarded for continuing to write. Which I am thankfully doing.
Another thing that I could talk is the ongoing shit on my head about my advancing age. It actually happens around this time of the year, every year. And I dont know what to do about it. Wait. Time to change track. Probably the last track. I have a minute and 40 seconds left to go.
Back. The next is Chaand Taare Tod Laaon. Again, a track that I love. It is all about ambition and all that. Something that I can totally relate to. Anyhow. A thought struck me. Do I want to write for 25 more minutes? I thought as I wrote and the answer is... No!
Why not? If I like writing so much?
Damn the buzzer just rang. Time's up!
More later!
So I am done.
I am not editing anything. I am not adding links. I am not correcting grammar. I am not formatting it any different. I am not touching the bit I wrote. If you are a psychologist, may be you want to do an analysis?
And as I was adding labels (read tags) to this post, I realized that I just did a session of free writing. Sounds interesting. Will explore. Until next time, over and out. And a random number fyi, I wrote about 1300 words, excluding this and the note on the top. Which is not bad, if you ask me!
Talk to Do ratio
I mean look at the screenshot. This is the twelfth year of writing a blog and apart from the first two, the only other year when I wrote so less was 2010. And in the last four year, I have averaged more than 100 posts per year. Why do I care about how much I write? Because I am a writer. And I want to be better one at that. And unless I practice my craft, I will not become what I want to become.
Like all other lapses when I haven't been able to write for long duration, I have multiple excuses. The first one among those is that work has kept me busy. The other is that I just havent felt like writing.
Now, is that a good thing? Of course not. And what am I doing about it? Nothing as yet.
So here's the deal. I will post something on the blog everyday, starting today. Till the end of the year. We should thus end the year with 150 odd posts - making this year the second best year of my blogging life. Now that's a great goal to chase!
I know. I know. I have made this promise umpteen times in the past. But then in the past I was not touching 33. And I am not getting any younger anytime. The time to do shit is now.
Oh, one more thing. A dear friend (RN09Dec) recently told me that I start a million projects and then never work on those. And when I do work, I dont finish. When I discussed this with kAgE and Agony Aunt, kAgE told me not bother as the projects left unfinished are left abandoned for a reason. And AA told me that my "talk to do" ratio tends to zero and in long run, people who have a high talk to do ratio do well. And I want to do well. And I shall work on improving this. Any tips anyone?
Book 2 - Update - Apologies
And I promise I will continue to write. I will continue to work on my craft. I will continue to improve my storytelling. And in 2016, I will deliver something that will make you happy. And proud. For sure. I promise.
So the delay is for multiple reasons. Like other things, if you follow this blog, here is a list.
A. My laziness. Writing a book is about discipline. Its about writing 1000 words everyday. At least. And more if you want the book to be interesting. For #tnks I wrote that many words. Every day. For few months. And then there was time I spent on editing. This time around, thanks to my laziness I haven't written anything per se.
B. Roti, Kapda aur Makaan. You'd know that I refuse to hold a steady job. And I depleted all my savings while I worked on #tnks. So this time around, I have had to put in a lot of time to make enough money to afford the fancy lifestyle I was used to. I know I know. There are people who work three jobs and yet get time to write. Salute to them. I dont have what it takes to do that. I cant live below a certain standard and still write. I am not crazy enough. Yet. May be when I am older.
C. Lack of focus. I have made a gazillion starts and I am not happy with any of those. I even wrote some 20K words for one of the plots but I am not sure I want to tell that story (the one based in Goa). However I now think I have something that I want to write about. Of course I will write crime but not that pop-culture kinds. I want to write serious, western crime. The kinds that gets converted into movies. Lets see if I have it in me. Lets see how it unfolds. Lets see if the story intrigues me enough to make me finish it by end of this year. If you really want to read the next thing, please pray that story keeps me hooked enough.
D. Lack of motivation. While the response to #tnks to has generally been very encouraging, it hasnt made me a literary star. And I am the kinds who needs external motivation to get things done. I know I like writing and all that but I really needed people to praise me for what I had cooked with tnks. And it hasnt happened. I mean I get fanmail and all that. But the numbers are dismal. The number is far from 1000 true fans that KK talks about. May be it takes time to get to that number of fans. May be not. I will never know. Unless I write the next book. No?
I am sure there are more reasons but I can come up with just these for the time being.
I think what I really need is someone to give me a big fat wad of money so that I may just sit there and write. May be once I get that money, I will become lazier and fatter and not write at all. May be its not about money at all. May be its about that zabardat toofan that I think Faiz talked about? May be. May be not.
Any how, hope you guys dont abandon me after reading this. Like I said before, it's people like you who support people like me to go forth and chase hard-to-get dreams like writing a book.
Thank you for supporting me.
Regards,
Saurabh Garg
July 2015
Oh, one more thing. The page for Book 2 is up already on FB. To be honest it doesn't really help but its something that everyone does. And I am not cool enough to not do things that the world does. So, in case you want to "like" it already without seeing the book, please, be my guest!
Thanks!
Will you?
I spot a recurring pattern in life. As readers of this blog, you must have noticed it as well. No?
That I play this game of hide and seek on the blog.
And if it's any consolation, I do it in real life as well.
There are phases when I have this spurt of activity where I get hyper active. I write almost everyday, think of ideas, get some exercise, do a lot of reading, talking, connecting and dreaming. I am in the zone. For days at stretch. I am in this Zen-like mode where nothing seems impossible and I want it all. And I work towards it. I am in the YOLO and FOMO mode and I say yes to everything. I overwork myself. To a point when I start cribbing about how overworked I am and how I don't have time to sleep. I do so till the time I start enjoying the pain. I am on this trip where pain becomes pleasure and I want more and more of it.
Till something happens and I snap out of it.
The "something" could be as large as the AC not working or as small as wrong signs from Universe. AC is large because I am the kinds that want everything in perfect order to keep me happy. So things like AC, relatives, visitors at home, Internet etc. bug me so much that I want to kill someone. Of course Universe-conspiring-to-give-me-gifts is important as well but I sincerely believe that I amongst the luckiest people. So I tide over that.
So till I snap out of the euphoria, I am getting things done. I am the king of the universe. But when I am out, I have this desperateurge need to crawl in a hole and wait for the winters to end. I sort of want to disappear. I cease all contact with the outside world (except my inner circle) and I don't want to be touched. I don't write, I don't tweet, I don't post updates on Facebook. I merely become a vegetable and try to exist. Of course if there's work, I have to live per shenanigans of clients. But I try to not accept work in such phases.
I know it sucks but this is probably that aspect of life that I cant change.
I know it sucks but that's how I am.
Of course I can blame it on my bipolarity. Or may be on the fact that I really really miss having sgMS around me. Or may be at the lack of direction that my life is flowing in. I can externalize the reasons but there's no one to blame but me and I will have to live with it.
The thing is, despite all that, as a friend, a reader, a patron, I will have to ask you, request you, implore you to allow me to live with it. Give me my space when I need. And hope that I come back stronger and higher.
Will you?
That I play this game of hide and seek on the blog.
And if it's any consolation, I do it in real life as well.
There are phases when I have this spurt of activity where I get hyper active. I write almost everyday, think of ideas, get some exercise, do a lot of reading, talking, connecting and dreaming. I am in the zone. For days at stretch. I am in this Zen-like mode where nothing seems impossible and I want it all. And I work towards it. I am in the YOLO and FOMO mode and I say yes to everything. I overwork myself. To a point when I start cribbing about how overworked I am and how I don't have time to sleep. I do so till the time I start enjoying the pain. I am on this trip where pain becomes pleasure and I want more and more of it.
Till something happens and I snap out of it.
The "something" could be as large as the AC not working or as small as wrong signs from Universe. AC is large because I am the kinds that want everything in perfect order to keep me happy. So things like AC, relatives, visitors at home, Internet etc. bug me so much that I want to kill someone. Of course Universe-conspiring-to-give-me-gifts is important as well but I sincerely believe that I amongst the luckiest people. So I tide over that.
So till I snap out of the euphoria, I am getting things done. I am the king of the universe. But when I am out, I have this desperate
I know it sucks but this is probably that aspect of life that I cant change.
I know it sucks but that's how I am.
Of course I can blame it on my bipolarity. Or may be on the fact that I really really miss having sgMS around me. Or may be at the lack of direction that my life is flowing in. I can externalize the reasons but there's no one to blame but me and I will have to live with it.
The thing is, despite all that, as a friend, a reader, a patron, I will have to ask you, request you, implore you to allow me to live with it. Give me my space when I need. And hope that I come back stronger and higher.
Will you?
Know Goa? Help me!
Hi,
If you are from Goa, if you've lived in Goa, know of stories of Goa, understand the quirks that moves people there, I want to talk to you.
Why do I want to talk to you?
I am an author and I am working on my next book. My first one, The Nidhi Kapoor Story, is here.
And since I am the author, I can play God and decide how, where, when do things happen in the book. On a whim, I have decided that I want an important part of the book to happen in Goa.
And since I am an outsider at best, I want to know about the place from people who know it. The ideal way to do it would be to live in Goa for a few weeks, talk to the locals, capture their stories et al. But since I dont have the luxury of an unlimited bank balance, I can do the next best thing - talk over the phone, email, Skype, etc.
What would I want to know?
I dont know. I want a freewheeling conversation to start with. In it, you can talk about one of the following (or more, or less, or anything else altogether)...
This is just a small list that I put together in about 5 minutes. Once I have had enough discussions with people, done enough desk research, read enough, I will followup with specific questions.
What do you get in return?
Not money for sure.
But I can offer gratitude and send some good karma your way.
Oh, I will also give you credits in the book and send a copy of the book when it comes out (it WILL come out - my first one did and there is no reason why this one will not. Hope you like reading it :)
What else?
I dont know. I am very open minded and welcome all suggestions. Please please please help me. I promise I will not waste your time.
Thanks for reading this!
SG
P.S.: The best way to reach me is on twitter (@saurabh) and the second best is to email me.
If you are from Goa, if you've lived in Goa, know of stories of Goa, understand the quirks that moves people there, I want to talk to you.
Why do I want to talk to you?
I am an author and I am working on my next book. My first one, The Nidhi Kapoor Story, is here.
And since I am the author, I can play God and decide how, where, when do things happen in the book. On a whim, I have decided that I want an important part of the book to happen in Goa.
And since I am an outsider at best, I want to know about the place from people who know it. The ideal way to do it would be to live in Goa for a few weeks, talk to the locals, capture their stories et al. But since I dont have the luxury of an unlimited bank balance, I can do the next best thing - talk over the phone, email, Skype, etc.
What would I want to know?
I dont know. I want a freewheeling conversation to start with. In it, you can talk about one of the following (or more, or less, or anything else altogether)...
- How was it to grow up in Goa? How was school? What did you do outside of it? What were you most fascinated about? What were you most scared of? What did you want to do after school hours? How did you kill time?
- How is it to live there? How has it changed over the years? What are your earliest memories of Goa?
- What are a few cliches about Goa? What do most people get wrong about Goa? What myths do you want to dispel about it?
- What are a few best kept secrets about Goa? And what are a few open secrets?
- If someone were to read a book on Goa, what must it include? What are other books, films etc that do great justice to the story of Goa?
- What makes Goa unique? What are a few things that are peculiar to Goa?
- What are the famous folklores of Goa that you've heard from your grandparents? Who are some notorious characters of Goa?
- What is that one story that is quintessentially Goa?
- What incidents have made Goa Goa?
- If there's something that you could change about Goa, what would it be?
This is just a small list that I put together in about 5 minutes. Once I have had enough discussions with people, done enough desk research, read enough, I will followup with specific questions.
What do you get in return?
Not money for sure.
But I can offer gratitude and send some good karma your way.
Oh, I will also give you credits in the book and send a copy of the book when it comes out (it WILL come out - my first one did and there is no reason why this one will not. Hope you like reading it :)
What else?
I dont know. I am very open minded and welcome all suggestions. Please please please help me. I promise I will not waste your time.
Thanks for reading this!
SG
P.S.: The best way to reach me is on twitter (@saurabh) and the second best is to email me.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)