How to spot a bachelor pad?

Day 39 of the lockdown.

Day 45 otherwise.

You know what this lockdown's doing to me? Making me take note of tiny little things that I have chosen to live with. And yet never realized that I was living with them. You know those things that are all around you. Visible. In plain sight. And you've been ignoring those. 

Of course, most of these things are things that have no inherent meaning but once they get added to your life, they start becoming valuable. And with time the value starts to grow. Linearly at first. Exponentially from thereon. And then suddenly, the object that is inherently penniless becomes the most important possession that you have! Like there is this Ganesh figurine I have. KG gave it to me on one of my birthdays. Not that I am religious but I tend to keep it close. And while it was used a paper-weight initially, now it has become this object that I can NOT lose! 

I am sure you have many such things. At your home. And around you. 

And why am I talking about this? 

Well, while I was getting ready in the morning today, I took note of the curtains in the room. There are three curtains and all three are different. One is a plain yellow sheath. The other has a pinkish flowery pattern on it. The third one is a plastic kind of thing with dolphins on it. And while I was seeing that, I was wondering, for someone like me who likes the idea of symmetry and pattern and has an opinion on design, how is that these curtains are so badly mismatched. And then it dawned on me - these were collected over the years. The yellow one is from a time when my sis and I lived together. The pink one I bought for this house - though I don't know how it ended next to the yellow on. And the dolphins - I don't even know where it came from. 

When I got looking, I realized most things at my house are such a ragtag bunch of things. I don't have furniture apart from a table and a bookshelf. Both were acquired at different times and different houses. Have stayed with me. I have two chairs, both different. Again, got at different times. All wardrobes are rented - each looks different from other. The bedsheets and pillow covers are the only upholstery that I have, apart from curtains, and no, these do not match either. 

Everywhere I look in the house, each thing is different from everything else. These don't fit. Even the best art director in Bollywood could think that a man my age and my taste could have a collection like the one I have. Well, how everyone in the world wants to be unique. Lol! 

Oh, I made a checklist that you can run through mentally to see if a house is a bachelor pad. 

1. Are the pieces of furniture mismatching? The ones that look as if they've been gathered over the years in various stages of life. 
2. Is the upholstery an assorted collection of colors, patterns, heights et at? Again, they could've been acquired over time, at various places that you have lived at.
3. Is the cutlery in the kitchen not from one set per se? But a collection of souvenirs from places that you've traveled to, gifts from friends, and from various events you've been to! At my place, out of 7 mugs I have, 5 are from Starbucks, one is from an event that I attended and the last one is I think an ex-girlfriend left behind. 
4. The electronics (except the TV) would be hand-me-downs and would be in dilapidated condition. After all, these things are not really required. 
5. The phone charging cable and the adapter would be a mismatch. 
6. If you get access to wardrobes, the hangars, on which clothes rest would again be an assorted mix. 
7. There would always be a key with the building security guard if the building has a guard. 
8. The place may or may not be clean depending on the person occupying the place.

These are the ones that I can think of. What about you? What do you often see at bachelor pads? Pray, tell me, and help me make this sheet exhaustive.

That's about it for the day! 

Previous posts in the lockdown series are - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 10, 11, 19, 30, 32, 34, 35, 37

Day 4 of 21daysOfLockdown

Day 4. Day 9. Whatever. Point is, I am indoors for a few days now (except grocery runs) and today I just did not want to do anything at all. I mean no work, no tracking, no timesheets, no Asana, no worry of the new normal in a post-Covid world, no stress about what I am eating and definitely no thinking about how I could be doing more in this time that all of us have at hands. 

So I did not. 

It's 7:59 PM in the evening as I write this trust me I have not done a single thing that I would do on a normal day. For starters, I haven't showered. I haven't cooked today (phew! what a relief). I had two Diet Cokes (and the supply is getting exhausted now). And I have parked myself in front of the TV and been on a marathon. I've seen two already, on to the third one as we speak. 

The only thing I'll do is upload a pic on Insta. I don't want to break that streak. 

Oh, and this post. Of course. 

So here's a thread that I wrote on twitter the other day when I was on my way back from Delhi. This was just 2 days before the Junta Curfew drama happened and about a week before the Lemme reproduce it here (and edit a bit to give it more context).

[START]On my way to Mumbai, settled on 11A. A zillion thoughts are clouding my head. Merit a blogpost but because there’s nothing else to do as I wait for the takeoff, here’s a thread. Primarily, me talking to myself. You know, like writing to the dear diary?

1. First things first. What is home? I was born in Haryana. Grew up in Delhi. I lived across India for a few months in tiny spurts. Now settled in Mumbai. Since 2014. Always maintained that Mumbai is home. But Delhi is where I belong. 

Or vice versa. Maybe. 

You know, confused millennial.
To add context, parents are back in Delhi. Significant relations (friends, co-conspirators, business partners, colleagues, loose connections, flings, etc) are mostly in Mumbai. Relatives are spread across the world. Not too attached to them.

Work is primarily Mumbai. All passion projects (except writing that can happen from anywhere) are Mumbai. 

Most importantly, I find Mumbai conducive to my lifestyle - professionals, creative kinds, hustlers, convenient, etc.

So, Mumbai looks like home. No? Maybe. Maybe not. 

You see, confused millennial.
2. Why am I going back to Mumbai? 

Isn’t Mumbai my home? But then home is where your people are. Or where the work is.

Most of the people that I want to see often (even though they are a mere handful) are indeed in Mumbai but are self-isolating. So physical proximity doesn’t really help. Plus I am not the video calls kinds. I love my handshakes and hugs and pats on the backs.

Work has come to a grinding halt. You see events and films. Marketing consulting is getting fucked as well. Slowly. Thing is, what I do is a discretionary expense at best. After all, everyone “knows” marketing. Yes, I do add value and yes it’s important. But a lot of it requires F2F interactions to deliver. But in times of Covid-19, these would get few and far between. As they say, winter is coming.

So there’s no real reason to go to Mumbai. Or stay back in Delhi for that matter. Thing is, life as we know it, will change. This IS the black swan event that @nntaleb has talked about often.

3. What about my people? 

I don’t know. While am a very benevolent, empathetic person, I have less than 5 people that I really really care for. The kinds I'd considered dying for. These 4-5 will be ok. And they anyway don’t rely on me for anything apart from emotional support that I am not too good at giving.

The larger community, world that I want to change, make better, I don’t know what would happen to them! And come to think of it, they don’t really know me. And I don’t do zilch for them right now. I just have a vague idea that I want to make this world a better place. Too much wishful thinking. 

You see, ambitious millennial. 

What about work? 

Well, post-Covid, people like me that rely on conversations and meetings to earn our bread would be forced to re-look at how we work. This is already happening in less than 10 days since I wrote this. 

My strength is opening doors with strangers and connecting them with others (people, ideas, etc) that add value to everyone. You know, scout. Or a connector, if you will. In the post-Covid world, this skill will move online. 

And I suck at that! 

My work will change. 

The way I work will change. As a result, my lifestyle will change. In fact, am already thinking about the next steps with life. I haven't trusted a lot on savings and it’s a hard and long few months ahead of me.

Of course, things may come under control soon and all this may turn out to be the musings of a restless mind that is bordering on paranoia. But this incident has made me look at the very assumptions that I’ve made to build my life. Need to think about things that will make life comfortable and better in times to come.

[END]

I hope that made sense. How are you coping up with the lockdown? What's your defense mechanism? 

And with that, that's it for today! See you tomorrow :) 

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2, 3

#untitled - 111119 (on Andheri)

I don't know what to write. There is a lot to be done - both in terms of what people expect from me (reverts, etc) and what I expect from myself (proactive work). But I am not in the frame to do either. Well, the frame is a funny thing. On one hand, you want to make your mood your bitch and get it to act as and when you want it to function. And on the other, you want to succumb to the vagaries of mood and give in. After all, that is what being human is. No? Anyhow. Here we go. 

So, I've just moved to a new locality within Mumbai (Andheri West). Even though I have been on and off in Mumbai since 2007, this is the first time that I am living in this part. The first time when I was here, I lived in Santa Cruz. Then I was in Nahar (Chandivali), Bandra, and Ghatkopar. Never in Andheri. I don't know why. Thing is, my choice of houses has always depended on proximity to work and to friends. There's no third leg. I've always sought familiarity and convenience over everything else. And that has meant that a lot of things that you would expect when you change a house haven't happened to me. The best example? Hunt for a maid! Every time I have moved because I have been close to a friend or something, I've had references. If I am in trouble, most times, someone is a hop, skip or a jump away.

Not this time.

The place where I have moved to, I don't know anyone. The only thing familiar is an McD, about 500 meters from my place. And a Starbucks about a KM from my place. And because these places are close by, since I've moved here (about 2 days now), I am walking over. And walking a lot in general.

These walks are reminding me of the time I've spent in unfamiliar locations in new cities in strange countries. Just that I don't have Dipanker next to me. And I don't have an event that I am supposed to execute. But everything else is the same. New place. New experiences. New things to ogle at. New questions. And the quest to find new answers. As I walk in these new lanes, I marvel at the sights and sounds and smells and people around me. Yes, they are Indian, as Indian as you get. But there is something about the place that is different from all the other places that I have lived in Mumbai. Oh, that's the thing about Mumbai. Each pincode offers you a distinct flavor of life.

Ghatkopar is upper-middle class Gujju. That means, "modern outlook with traditional values" and other things like that. Could also mean nouveau riche but you never know. May be they were rich even back then when Ghatkopar was not what is it today? 

Powai is expats and expat kinds. That means people who have fancy jobs that allow them fancy lifestyles. The kinds they would have in a different country. You know, cobbled streets, running clubs, gardens et at.

Bandra is cool and modern. That means that any new revolution, a new spark would first get ignited at Bandra and then spread to other parts. I think if you traced back the origins of Avocados, Keto, Kombucha and other such things, you'd end up in one of the tiny lanes in Bandra.

Andheri, ladies and gents is what the maya nagri is all about. The city of dreams. The city that never sleeps. Where everything is possible. You could be hoping to land a job at a radio station and you can become the biggest superstar the world has seen. You could be beach-hopping searching for the love of your life and you'd find her on the very last beach of that day. And then you'd conquer the Bollywood. You could sleep on the floor of cafes for years and then catapult to stardom overnight. You know, this where you could be that bhagwaan in an instant. Your greatest success is just an accident away. And from whatever I know, accidents routinely happen around here. In fact, I think one ought to pick the place they live at, things they do to maximize the number of unplanned interactions with others in the same interest areas. You want to be an actor? Live in Andheri. Want to be a painter? Bandra. A start-up? Powai!

Coming back. Everything written about the magic of Mumbai, I suspect, is applicable to Andheri. Charm could be Bandra. Heritage could be Colaba. Fashion could be Bandra. But Magic has to be Andheri. And nothing else.

Now, I am just about 2 days old here, a tad delirious (I haven't been sleeping well - there's no AC at home) and little lost (people are still unfamiliar). I will explore more in the next few days. Let's see if I can discover what makes Andheri this unique melting pot like no other. In Mumbai. Or may be in India.

Till then, over and out!

Oh, one more thing. Should you have stories that you think are uniquely Andheri, please do share those with me. I am at @saurabh.

PS. The biggest superstar does not live in Andheri. But his life, his story must've inspired a disproportionately large chunk of men and women and others to move to Mumbai, to Andheri. Hoping they'd get a step closer to their dreams. 

PPS. This move to Andheri is unique for me because this is the first time I am not doing it for my work or for a friend. Something in me had rebelled against I don't know what and I wanted to sort of restart my life from scratch. This move is the closest that I could do to erase, undo, delete my previous life. No, I can't stop with C4E or AWSL. No, I can't hit that reset button. But I can start. You know, today's the first day of the rest of your life? That. Ok. I don't even know what I am talking about. Over and out. Do lemme know what you think of this piece. 

Hello, Serendipitous Adventures in Mumbai.

So, I recently read this post about how to maximize serendipity. It is a fascinating read - the kinds that I wish I had written. Each word is deep, insightful and actionable. Do read the post. And please come back to this page once you’ve read.

Point 2 on this post advises you to be a connector. The author says he hosts intimate events where he invites passionate, hyper-curious individuals and they meet often for a day of action and adventure. Here’s a screen grab from the post.

This got me thinking, why not do the same in Mumbai, a place where I am located? 

And I put this on twitter. 

Experiment. If you are in #Mumbai and are the "curious" kinds, full of energy, want to learn new things, experiment, grow better and know more people, let's get together and we'd do something interesting. In? DM me. Limited to 8 people. 1 is me. So 7 more. #RTpls

And while I did get some people interested in the meetup, everyone asked for details. 

And thus, here are some.

What I propose. 

1. Create a meetup group of "curious" people that love to learn "new things" and want to know more people. 
2. We try to get people from across age groups, genders, interest areas and all that. The intent is to get a variety of opinion and thought. 
3. We meet once a month or so (I don't know if I want to structure it rigidly). 
4. At each meetup, we have an agenda. Say in the first meetup, all of us goto a Salsa workshop (I suck at dance - I have two left feet), followed by a brunch at some indie chef. And then end the day with a theatre or something. In the next meetup, we could go for a trek or play football or get together for clubbing. Of course, this is not defined. The itinerary gets decided by the attendees prior to the meetup. 
5. Each activity that we do must be a group activity that is novel for most participants. For example, theatre is novel for me. And I am sure I am not alone. 
6. If you "sign up", while you are not obligated to attend every meetup, you ought to respect time and attention for others. Once you say you are in on a certain date, please do show up :)
7. No fees. We split the cost of the "adventure" among attendees. 
8. I plan to do the first meetup in the next 15 days. Probably on the weekend of 20th - 21st April.

These are the things that I know as of now. 

Of course, early days. 

If you are interested in this, let's build this together?  

And truth be told, I don't know where this would go or if I would get enough people to run this experiment. And in case I do get the people, I don't know if I would be successful at running this. But then, what's the worst that could happen? 

Let's try? 

If you are in, DM me on twitter and let's take it from there. 

Oh, while I am not sure of what all we could evolve into, I am very sure of things that we will NOT be. Here's a list. 

• We are not a dating platform. You like someone in the group, great! But please do not come with the intention of dating. There are way too many other platforms for that. 
• We are not an opportunity to paddle MLM goodies. 
• This is NOT business networking. This is an opportunity to meet interesting people IRL. 

That's for the time being. 

Could I cover anything else? 

One more thing. I call this Serendipitous Adventures in Mumbai. Game? 

The Shoe Situation

The pair of Crocs that I wear everywhere I go.

If you know me, you would know of my hatred for shoes. 

And you'd know that I have a million pairs already (even though I dont wear them). 

And I have tried rather unsuccessfully in the past to start wearing em. At times its been at the insistence of my mentors, at times at the need thrown by attempts at losing weight, at times by my own wild thoughts and opinions about how I want to run my life. 

But then none of these have been successful. And lapse back into this routine where I just throw on the Crocs and I am on my way. 

But this changes from today on. Here are some reasons why.

Reason 1. I want to dress better.

No serious. 

I mean even though I love all the ads that Raymonds makes, I have hated the concept of a well-dressed man. But now I know that I need to change that. Because I work in a world that evaluates people on the basis of what they wear and how they look. 

I cant change the way I look but I can for sure change the way I dress. 

Shoes is a great starting point! 

The next would be clothing. At some point in life. 

Plus, at the Mastermind group that I am a part of, I have made a commitment that I will be more presentable. This means that I need to have "decent" clothes on. Including shoes. And even though my design sense sucks, my choice of clothes is probably the worst ever, I will make an effort to be better. As long as I dont have to buy way too many clothes, minimalism you see. 

Reason 2. Mumbai Metro! 

Yes. The Metro. 

No, people arent stomping on my feet just as yet but the entire city of Mumbai is dug up like a minefield and the ones like me who like to walk (and live in chappals) end up with feet that look like a mason's. 

Which is ok. 

But then most times when I walk, I club it with work. And like I said, we are judged by what we wear and signals we create rather than work we do. So I dont want to reach meetings with my feet covered in dust and muck. 

From what I know, its ok to have a pair of shoes that is dirty but its a strict no to have feet that are dirty. Ergo. 

And yes, I know people that carry a pair of shoes in their cars. You see when they step in a meeting, they change into those shoes. 

I'd do this as well someday. 

But lemme get a car. Which if all goes well, will be this year! Like I've been planning for almost 5 years! 

Reason 3. Age. 

Age? 

Well, I am 36. And that means my body is on a downward spiral now. Joints, cartilages, muscles, tendons and I dont know what all are now weak, brittle and prone to breakage. And if I have to live till 120 (one of my #lifegoals), I better take care of these "assets". 

Reason 4. All Birds. 

All Birds has done what Nike (or Shoe Dog for that matter could not). No, they dint make a smart shoe or whatever. It has captured my attention (like all other things that wannabe hipsters like me chase). This is a pair of shoe I want! I dont need it. I have enough. But I want. You know what am saying?  

*** 

In the end, if 2019 has to be a year of change (and superlative success), why would I not want to change this thing called dressing up? 

Even though its devastating to have to change at 36 to be able to fit in. To get proved wrong after half the useful life is over.

But I think its not too late. 

We remain students and we ought to continue to grow. 

And improve. 

And change. 

Starting with shoes. 

The Stories from Mumbai

This idea has been swirling at the back of my head for some months now. I finally found time to write it down! Here it is! 

Background

On a recent trip to Helsinki (in Aug 18), I saw this book - People Make The City. On their website, they say its a book "full of stories from the capital’s creative makers and doers. An insiders’ guide for experiencing the local way of life."

And then, on another recent trip to Amsterdam (Oct 18), I saw a similar book. I cant recall the name right now but the idea was same. A collection of stories, ideas, thoughts, photos, places etc that a local at Amsterdam would want to share with other locals.

Both these books were fascinating and had stories that I could never find on a tripadvisor or a Lonely Planet! 

And it got me thinking, that we need a similar book for various cities in India. If not all the cities, then for Mumbai, Goa, Bangalore, Jaipur, Agra and Delhi for sure. Thats where most travellers and tourists land up. And the book would do well as a guide, as a companion, as a souvenir, heck as a collection of postcards! 

The idea

So, what if we compile and curate a collection of stories from the city of Mumbai (to start with) and make those available in shape of a book? 

If not anything else, the book will be a conversation starter. 

The book will showcase our city, in a way the city has to be experienced. 

The book is an opportunity to connect with the locals.

The book is a great piece or art to have in your home!

Its a great gift to someone new.

Its the perfect take-away for people new to the city.

In one line, the book will help build a community! 

How is it different from those hundreds of blogs, websites, books and magazines? 

It is not. Those blogs probably do a better job! 

The book is not meant to make commercial sense. I dont want to make money with it. 

This is a book that I wish to do because I want to experience the cities like the locals. I want to walk down the Marine Drive with one of the locals and listen to her stories of the city. I want to sit at an Irani Cafe and hear the owner reminisce about a time that is gone. I want to be at Shivaji Park and see those hundreds of kids hoping to score hundreds of runs for India. I want to live the life of the hustlers of Versova and experience the agony and the anguish and the ecstasy that they go through as they find their way in Bollywood and someday inspire the very same emotions in their audience. And more. So many more!

In one line, this book is for me! 

I want to listen to the stories. 

And I want to share these stories with whoever wishes to listen.

That's it! 

Nothing more. 

Nothing less. 

Oh, and no. I dont intend to make money with this. If there are any monetary gains, I pledge to donate those to institutions that work towards making the city a better place. 

Ok. How would you go about it? 

For starters, I need access to following "types" of people... 

A. People who'd want to tell stories of their love for the city.

Because without the stories, there is nothing. 

B. People who can enable the book (writers, designers, photographers, printers etc). 

Because once I have the stories, I need to bind them into a book! 

C. People who may want to read this book. 

But since I am assuming that I am the only reader! So this is sorted :) 

I know its a tough one. Who would want to write for no expectation of any money? Heck, I dont want to engage anyone if I cant pay them. After all the book is being written for me! And with the kind of money I have, how do I enable this? I dont know. But I will find a way. 

What all stories do I want to include?

For the time being, for the Mumbai edition, I am looking for people that love the city of Mumbai. And like the cliche goes, the city must run in their blood. Simple. 

The stories must inspire me. 

The stories must make me jealous of their relationship with the city! 

They may or may not live here. 

They may or may not have a story with a twisted arc. 

They just need to have a perspective that is worth spending time on.

In fact as I write this, I can think of a few people that fit the bill. 

There is this lady on twitter. The posts that she makes about the city of Mumbai, I want to somehow become friends with her and implore her to tell me of what goes into her head when she's taking those pics or writing those words. 

There is this person I know who was head of marketing with one of the leading companies in the country and then he quit to start a walking-tours company in Mumbai. 

And then there is this junior from college who runs a chain of hostels in Mumbai and Jodhpur! 

Apart from these three, I am sure I can get access to scores of people who'd have unique stories to share, unique experiences that a traveller ought to seep in! I just need to find them and get them to help me. 

Help me showcase the great city of Mumbai to the ones that are new! Please! 

Finally,

What do you think of the idea? 

Would you want to read a book like this? 

Who all do you think I should approach to work on this book? 

How can the book be designed? 

What structure could I give to the book? 

What could the book be called? I suck at naming things! 

Or, is the idea shitty and have been done to death? 

I need to get a life? 

Whatever. But please do tell me. Comments are open. And I am at Saurabh.

Thank You! 

The Powai Proximity Problem

I live in Ghatkopar and its about 35 bucks away from Powai. And all the places that I typically hang out at - Starbucks, LPQ, Mohini etc. And places like Harry's that I like to go but they frown when I go in chappals and shorts.

So since I've moved to GK West (as VG calls it), I try and not go anywhere else but Powai. For shopping, for eating out, for fun, for parties, for running errands, for working, for doctors and for anything else that a 35-year may have to do.

Except office, that is about 150 bucks (and an hour) away from GK. And places that I cant avoid the travel to - client meetings, my homoepath in Mahim, airport etc. When I do have to travel to these places, I ensure that I leave GK by 7 AM and am on the way back by 4 PM. Thats how you avoid traffic in Mumbai. There is no other way. And there is no worse way to waste life.

So, when I have to meet people, I "request" them to come over to Powai. Unless they really really really can't make it and I really really really want to meet them. Or unless I am already at work and they could meet in en route to GK.

But then life is not that simple. There are tons of issues with it. Here's top three that I can document.

A. Monotony 
Most of my friends want hang out at newer places, experience new things, taste new tastes, go to the newest fancy thing in the town. For me, all these are merely incidental. The idea is to catch up with friends and we can do that at a Starbucks or at one of the numerous places around Powai. Or even a drive for that matter.

However, I am told that the idea is to have a good time and good time is a combination of good food, good music, good shared activity and good conversations. There are varying degrees of contribution of each factor. For me, the conversation and activity contribute 50% each. Food and music is immaterial. So, at Powai, I we can find any activity that we may want to indulge in, at any budget (which often is not a challenge as most of my friends are richer than me) and almost all cuisines. So, I dont see the need to step out.

I understand that for people other things could have varying percentages. And I ok with it but I dont understand why would the group travel to Bandra (about 40 minutes and 200 bucks) to just eat a salad and go back to their respective places. Sum total of all hours wasted in all this travel is criminal. And on top of that, our time is severely limited.

B. Limited contact with others 
As I try and build AWSL and C4E, I realise that human connections are super important if you want to get ahead in life. So this is something that I anyway suck at. I am not an extrovert and I suck at sucking up. I am generally nice to people but I cant be overtly praiseful. My EQ is questionable and my empathy for others borders on the ones that sociopaths have.

I am working on changing this. Not tough if you ask me. However most people dont operate at the super-rational level that I am trying to achieve. And thus it gets tough to call them to Powai all the time. Or meet them at 4 at Saki Naka. Or at 3 at Andheri.

The other issue is that other constructs that allow you to mingle with people require fake camaraderie. And that requires sessions of alcohol, smokes, drugs and other such things. The only thing that I abuse is Coke. I thus get stuck with it as well.

One way to resolve this is by considering new contacts as work. And then, just like I dont question the need to go to work, I probably wont question the need to go to meet people. Lemme give this a shot in H2-2017.

The other way is to do such brilliant work that they really really really want to meet you. And travel to where you are. This is something that I can work on, starting NOW! 

C. Old age
As you grow old, you get set in your ways. You develop strong opinions about things and places and people. And worse of them all, you develop opinions of self <this entire blog, this particular post, the thoughts and all that are a manifestation of my opinion of myself - which is pretty huge>.

This opinion of self (aka ego) needs to get broken soon and fast. And that can happen when you expose yourself to new things, new ideas, new people and such. And all the new things, ideas, people dont really hang out in Powai. The composition of people at Powai is not a representative of what we have in Mumbai / MH / India or the world. And it is definitely not representative of the kind of people I want to hang out with.

And who are these people that I want to hang out with? Entrepreneurs. Startup folks. Athletes. Rich people. I want to hang out with people who create new things, solve real problems and as they say, move the human race forward.

Assuming that they would want to hang out with me!

Brings me to a rant. I am driven by the lust to improve myself. In everything I do. I want to be healthier, richer, happier. I want to push my limits. I want to climb the Everest! I want to do a lot of things. And I want to do all those things well. And for that I need a certain kind of environment (not that people without that environment dont do things well - I am programmed to do it like that) and leave Powai (or Mumbai for that matter), I cant seem to find the same. Its funny because we live in the world full of information and connecting with a Bill Gates is as easy as sending him an email - his email address is in public domain. And yet I cant seem to find the kind of people I want to be around. 

And you know a funny thing? I am happy to get away from Powai for that.

Funny how the Powai Proximity solves itself! 

Untitled 1 - Sep 2016

So since I started working on C4E, I sort of "inherited" an office space. And now that I have a space, the middle-class Indian in me is making me maximise my time at office. Couple that with my hatred for traffic in Mumbai and the shitty house I live in, you have me spending 15 hours in office. Of course I am not working all of those 15 hours but I am busy on something or other.

I honestly dont mind long hours, if only we have a snooze room or something where I could take occasional naps. And a gym kind of thing with a shower that allowed me to pretend and do something to lose weight.

On lose weight piece, I stumbled onto this piece about this guy who wanted to climb to the top of the Everest with a Google Street View camera and record a panoramic view from the top of the world. No he could not, he died in an earthquake. Hats off to him and his balls. Really. I mean how many have such an audacious plan and the balls to actually chase the dream, while working at a hyper-competitive setup?

The other bit from the story is that providence seems to be sending me signs. Of two things - my promise to myself to climb the Everest before 2025 and the limited time that we have. Oh, on the shortness of life and all that, I re-read the account of Prof. Bakshi's life yet again. Read it. Must read. In BOLD. He also posted this note on the BFBV group. The thing that jumps at me is that a man ought to get financially independent as soon as he can. I am 34 years too late for that. But then I cant cry about it. Can I? What I could do is reach there fast. May be in the next 2-3 years? But wait. What's the number that I am chasing? At the way I live my life right now, I spend about a lakh a month and I dont have a car or a house. Should I want those, I need to shell out 5 crores upfront and say another 5 on maintenance over lifetime. Assuming my lifestyle remains same and I live till I am 50 (another15 years), I am looking at another 3 crores (adjusted for inflation). So, am looking at a 13 crore kind of corpus. In 3 years. 5 crores of net income each year. Or 10ish crores of topline each year. Wow! Thats a lot of money. And such a depressing thought.

Thing is, I shouldve more prudent like my batchmates from MDI. Almost all bought the house within five years after MBA and now they are almost EMI free. Wait. Lemme not compare. It will suck whichever way I look. The point of this post was to talk about how I am in office and I dont want to to back to where I live. There's no one to go back to and worse, the place sucks. Good bit is that I am going to move out soon.

And with that, the pain it takes to move! Sigh! You know of someone who wants to rent out a 2BHK in Mumbai? All I want is a high floor, new construction, gated community and a swimming pool in the complex. Too much to ask for? In Mumbai? May be. May be not.

The Sunday Shortage

So, the world needs more Sundays.

No no, the world doesn't mean you and I that (who?) work in cushy corporate settings where workplaces are lined up with glass panels and the biggest worry is keeping the coffee warm hot in the centrally air-conditioned buildings. We have earned them. Both the hot coffee and the Sundays. We are entitled to them. And to Saturdays. And even more entitled to other occasions reasons for not walking into the jail office. Willingly.

World means the aam aadmi that slogs the ass off for 6 days on the trot, come sardi, garmi or barsaat. The person that keeps the office kitchen stacked with goodies, the air-con humming, the glass pane spic and span. The person that often travels almost 2 hours everyday to reach work, work for 12 hours and then take another 3 hours to reach back. And then get ready to go through the same rigmarole in less than 6 hours. Including sleep.

The Sunday I am talking about is the day when he can be a boss. The day when there's nobody breathing down his neck. The day when he must get things done for this home, his house, his family. Fast. So that he can stretch and get lazy about things. And then take his family out to a place where they may indulge in simple pleasures of life. Places like the Juhu Chaupaatis, Marine Drives.

And since almost everyone is resting, recuperating, is at home, the city of dreams appear much less crowded, even liveable. When there's hardly any traffic on the road and you can reach where you want to be in a jiffy. Life looks so simple, so manageable on Sundays that I wait for 6 days to get to a Sunday.

No, not to recuperate. I dont want to recuperate on a Sunday. I dont want to sleep late on a Saturday so that I can sleep till late on a Sunday. On a Sunday I want to be up and about as soon as I can. I want to live it up. I want to enjoy the calmness that prevails around me. I want to soak in the space that I dont get on other days. I want to be less rushed. I want to breathe - take a deep breath that I dont get on other days.

I want to team up with other romantics and dreamers like me and take off to the fantasy land that is made up of our respective ideas of right and wrong. Like, right now, as I write this, back of my head, I am thinking about utopian business where everyone is an owner and has the freedom to choose what they want to work on. I'd talk about it sometime later. Right now, rant is on Sundays. So, sundays are perfect to do things that you never thought you had the time for. For example, this blog. As worked has picked up, I have sort of ignored the only true companion that I've had since 2004 I think. Have been irregular this year, the year when my next book will hit the stores. Do buy it.

Coming back, on a Sunday, even time seems to slow down. Except the speed at which the Starbucks' barista can whip up the coffee. Do you see the irony in my post here? May be you need a Sunday to think about it.

P.S.: Not happy about how this ends!

Rant on Mumbai

Yesterday I was coming back from some place at around 9 (pm). To reach home, I cross the most godforsaken place in the world - Saki Naka (the wikipedia article does not do justice to the fuckery this place is. And its worse than the place where I live in Delhi). Since I knew that I was going to get stuck in traffic, I was in a really foul mood. This is when I looked out of the rick and saw a man my father's age running behind a bus, trying to catch it. He had a backpack and he was wearing regular trousers and a shirt. At the risk of generalizing, he looked like a clerk or some other administrative person - one of the millions in the great Indian middle-class. 

Since there was traffic, the bus was barely crawling ahead. My rick was right behind the bus and the man was literally running parallel to the rick I was in. And since the man was old, he could run only at a certain speed and the crawl-speed of the bus was more than what the man could run at. He knew and I knew and probably everyone around knew that he was not going to catch the bus. And yet he kept chasing the bus. Despite the inevitable, he continued to chase. And he did it with all the fervor he could.

As the traffic opened up, the bus zoomed ahead and whatever little hopes that man had of catching the bus went in smoke. And the man finally quit the chase. With a shrug. And then he started to walk. And there was some purpose in the way he walked! I loved it. I loved the way he went about it. I wish I had that spirit. I wish I had the grit that he had.

Anyhow while I was thinking about it, I realized a few things.

A. He was old. If my father were to run like that, I would be really really sad. And come to think of it, my father has used public transport all his life. Am sure he would have chased buses and trains while working. Me on the other hand, I have used public transport only till the time I was in the college. After that I had a bike. And enough money to hire a rickshaw or taxi or something private. I am extremely lucky to have a family that has supported me with all that.

B. While I may crib about my inability to make enough money and get sad about it, there are so so many people that have far less than what I have and are struggling with even the basics, and yet they are happy. I mean that old man. He was ok to run to catch his bus. And I am sure it must be a routine for him. And yet he was ok with it. He knows that he will win some and lose some. And here I am. Who's never had to lose anything!

C. Mumbai is a tough tough place to live in. My life is little comfortable - I have a big enough place to live in, enough money to pay for rickshaws and Ubers, enough money to eat what I want to, when I want to, where I want to, enough to take those foreign holidays and so on and so forth. And despite all this, I feel strained. The mere existence in Mumbai is tough. At times I want to leave everything and move to the mountains - which I would've done if I #tnks had sold well (after all purpose, passion and success are all interlinked!). May be I would if #book2 does well. I dont know if I can be a Ruskin Bond but I would try.

I digressed. The point is, Mumbai is a tough tough place to live in! And I have been shielded from the toughness to a large extent. I do not know what dirt and grime and heat and dust is like. I just cry like a baby. I need to stop that.

D. While the spirit struggle of Mumbai is a great thing, I am not sure I appreciate that a place could put such a large chunk of humanity in such miserable conditions. And each person is trapped in Mumbai because they dont have anywhere else to go, anything else to do. The ones who've made it are ok, the ones who haven't are too tired to move on. Life looks hunky dory from our Ubers and air-conditioned offices and lavish parties at five-stars and view from atop the high-rises and occasional travels abroad and fancy things that we talk while we work. But in real life, life is lot more than that. And we need to somehow learn.

If nothing, the resolve to help the ones who lost on the ovarian lottery is now stronger. Once I have reached a point when I have made enough (I dont know what is enough), I would really work towards generating employment, elevating the lives, education and health. Basically go the Bill Gates way. Some day. Not today. I could jump in today but the impact that I would have would be limited. I dont want to impact ten lives. I would rather do create a fortune and then use that to bring about change on a larger scale. Like Bill Gates! Again I am digressing. The point is that Mumbai is a tough place to make a living. And the scene yesterday made me rethink my choice to stay in Mumbai.

Oh, to end this, barely five minutes after I saw that old man, I saw another man - this time far younger, sprinting behind a bus that he knew that he was never going to catch. He was in a Jet Airways uniform and looked like a loader or helper. The he was running, it was remarkable! I dont think I can run like ever! Plus, the thing is, he would've walked from the airport to the junction and then must have missed his bus. Life is so fucking tough and here I am lamenting about my inability to afford a car or a better lifestyle!

Oh Mumbai - the maya nagri! It is so so difficult to love you. And even more difficult to hate you!

Gaming Mumbai. Part 1 - Managing Traffic

I wrote this originally as Mumbai Part 2. Now that this is Part 3 of my affair with Mumbai, I would post this as a part of Part 3.

Mumbai is a tough place to live in (compared to Delhi - where I come from). There is never ending traffic jams, air so polluted that you cant breathe, roads and potholes that could put minefields to shame and so on and so forth. If I was to scribble it on paper, the list of rants against Mumbai, the trail could go to the moon and back and yet not get over.

But then this post is not about the rant list or the distance between earth and moon, but is about how I plan to game Mumbai and its travails while I am here. I mean I know that I am going to be here for some time, so I better get used to it and start gaming it. Gaming as in manipulating, scheming it to suit my purpose.

So the plan to game Mumbai is in nascent stages and shall evolve over a period of time. Right now I would talk about how to avoid traffic, that is probably my biggest crib against Mumbai.

And few assumptions. Unlike a lot of people I can control my time most of the times. I have the luxury of not going to office and hence I can control my time and meetings, except a few times when I am supposed to meet people. I realized that the gaming bit has to start with managing life around traffic. If I can do that one thing, my life would be so much sorted.

Here is the list that I shall take up seriously to avoid traffic in Mumbai.

1. Avoid rush hours. Never never never (three times for emphasis) travel between 8 AM and 11 AM, and between 5 PM and 930 PM. Leave home at 11 and be back by 530. All the meetings, interviews, digging out, sniffing out, research and other work related chores must happen between 11 and 530. This is a good 6 and half hours and this is enough time for three, one hour long meetings. And the commute time to reach from one meeting to another. If I have to have to leave before 11 AM, leave before 8 and reach destination by 830 and wait. Numerous McDonalds across the city are open and they serve really good breakfast. If I am somehow left on the road after 530, I'd park myself at the nearest coffee shop for few hours and not waste time getting stuck in traffic. And while at the coffee shop, order the cheapest beverage - a bottle of water.
2. Meet when absolutely necessary. No more socializing and making new contacts. Phone calls and emails work as well. If I have to travel to meet, club meetings as per locations, as much as possible. If not at the same place, stay within a particular locality. So one day I could have meetings at Bandra, the other day at Powai and then one at BKC and so on and so forth.
3. Stay close to highways / stations. So, for example, an ideal place to meet is Oberoi Mall if I have to meet someone Goregaon.
4. Use peak hours for self. The time between 530 and 930 could be an ideal time for a catnap. And socializing could happen post 930. This time can also be used for gymming swimming, reading, dinnering etc. 
5. No first thing in the mornings. If someone insist a meeting “first thing in the morning”, politely decline and schedule a “last thing on the previous evening” meeting. 
6. Spend time frugally. Always carry some reading material. In case I am getting stuck at a coffee shop without any inspiration to write or create, I would rather read, than idly surf the web or tweet away to glory.
7. Maker hours. Use a tweaked version of maker hours. A concept I borrow from PG, maker hour is defined as a time where you don’t have any meetings. I actually do something in those maker hours rather than just push paper. So two days in a week (Monday and Thursday), I plan to use as maker hours. I would write for longer duration, update the blog, design and do things that I need to do on a computer. I am writing this post on a Saturday, the first half of which, I am using as Maker Hour.
8. Multi task. Get a car and a mobile phone headset and use the commute time to make phone calls and get work done on the phone. It could be a good idea to keep a list handy that would have all calls to be made during the day. Unless there is fire when the call flow would become unpredictable, this overall is a good idea. Not applicable for jobless me.
9. Know my traffic. And shortcuts, back alleys, city etc. And use Google Maps for traffic predictions. It is fairly accurate and when I know that I am heading into an area with a lot of traffic, I can avoid it or take a detour.

Thats it. If I do these things well, I believe I can cut a lot on useless commute and I may actually do something, rather than merely talking.

Of course one may argue that I dont have to stay in Mumbai if I am peeved so much about traffic and I need to think so much about getting out off my house. I can just go live in Delhi, Bangalore etc if I have to. But then, despite all my cribs against Mumbai, there is no denying that there is something about Mumbai that brings me back over and over again.
 
Anyway, more on Gaming Mumbai in subsequent posts. May be a list of places in Mumbai where I could park myself without paying a lot of money while I am in transit.

Substance Abuse!

My addiction to (and experiments with) things like Coke and Red Bull have been documented time and again, on this blog and elsewhere on the Internet. And no wonder I am told that I am an addict. In my defense. To be honest, there is no problem in being an addict, its just that its a drain on money (both coke and Red Bull are expensive indulgences) and apparently they are hazardous to health. But I am the kinds that goes by empirical evidence and since there is no documented evidence as such, I refuse to hear the conspiracy theorists and regularly give in to the temptation and consume as much sugar water and caffeine as I can afford.

But then I realized that I am on the wrong side of the bell curve now and I need to try and do things that would make me an outlier (read live a 100 years). Like the current fads in India, the health and fitness fad is in vogue and is attracting attention by the buckets. And being a marketer's delight, I cant stay away from it. So I thought may be, 2013 could be the year when I make myself a better individual. And to start with, I could focus on tangibles like health. Common sense tells me that I need to stop the rampant substance abuse that I am so used to. In fact one of the resolutions of 2013 is to get fit and run finish a marathon by end of this year. Ofcourse running requires lot of stamina and running a marathon requires training, determination and a huge willpower. I, to be honest, have none of these things but I hope to work on these during this year.

Thus, since 2013 started, I have not touched coke or red bull. Part of the reason is health, part if money (Mumbai is an expensive place) and a huge part is test of determination and willpower. Imagine me ignoring that water droplet trickling down the shiny metal case, that little pop when you pull the flip tab back, that rush of fizz when the can just opens and that anticipation of ice cold coca cola going down my throat. I'd say impossible. But I'd make the impossible possible. Its been 4 days and I havent felt any real need. Except that I am low on energy the entire day. Let me talk about that!

When I was consuming it, all the sugar and caffeine gave me abundant energy to engage in million things that I am working on all the time. So much so that I could go three days without sleep. Avoiding these two things has had a stupid side effect on me. The entire day, I am low on energy and sleepy. A feeling that I hate like no other. I have tried alternatives like no-sugar coffee, green tea, lime water etc but nothing seems to be working so far. I am as sleepy as I was in those financial management classes, back in college, which I dont even know why I took!

Funny is that while I was in Delhi, I dont think I had these issues as I slept very little and yet I was so full of energy the entire day. And yes there was a time when I was off these two substances an yet I had all the energy. Guess something is wrong with Mumbai. Apart from this bout of lethargy, there are funny rashes all over the skin. I only consume bottled water and prefer eating simple food. And yet my body is not accepting this place. Dunno how. Dunno why.

Maybe I need to get back to substance abuse soon. Dunno. Any tips?

Mumbai Part 2. Day 24.

This is going to be a short post. So that you may actually read the entire thing and not just skim.

Its almost a month since I moved to Mumbai. And I still trying to figure out things. Part reason of that is that I have decided to live with a friends from college. And that means I am dependant on two more people to figure out shit. Even if they are understanding and independent, human courtesy says that I need to include them in whatever I decide. So for example, despite a frantic house search, I we haven't been able to close on a place where I we would live. This, for the record, is against my DNA. I am like that lone mercenary who wants to remain independent and live like his way, without regard to all the burden that comes from "belonging" to a faction.

The other part is that I am older and hence more inflexible. And that means there is another set of problems that I have. Taking the example of house, I want to live in a spacious, airy, clean, new house. Which, in Mumbai, dont exist. The ones that do, demand a rental of a million bucks a day, which I cant pay. In general, the inflexible me in finding it hard to adjust to madness in Mumbai. But then, there is no place like Mumbai, anywhere in the world and I have to go through the grind. And no, I am not enjoying this at all. May be like all oldies, I am averse to change and since "growing up" is a slow and gradual transition, I am consciously in the same space as a 25 year old but subconsciously I am now 30 and that means there is a constant conflict between my two sides.

So, changing tracks, this post is about what I do in my spare time, which in my case, I have in abundance. And I am at my wits end trying to figure out what to with it.

Let me talk about Delhi to give a perspective. In Delhi, for some reason, I always had something or the other to do. If nothing, I could remain holed up at home and flick tv channels and maybe watch some movie. If not that, my family has stayed at the same place for almost 20 years and I know every nook and cranny in that part of Delhi. I know most people and there is a sense of familiarity. I could go for a walk, or a smoke and get back feeling good about the camaraderie that I share with the place. There are tons of friends/acquaintances that I could meet at random and have a good time and come back. I had a social life in Delhi.

Mumbai on the other hand, I have been out of this place for more than 3 years. All my friends are now married, engaged or seeing someone. And that means I am not high on their priority list (25 yr old). And that means that they are busy on weekends with household chores and stuff. And that means that I can only see them for a window of an hour or so, rather than entire weeks that we spent together at one point in time. Dissonance. Then, when I was younger, I was a promising and rising young man and had irrational beliefs about thing. That made me pseudo popular and I could meet strangers and paddle my beliefs and spend time engaging in mental masturbation. Now, I am a senile old man and I have a tough time going out to meet strangers. I refuse to take part in political, activist movements and pseudo intelligent conversations do not excite me anymore. As a result, I am not popular at all.

I can now spend all my time either reading or writing. Which is not bad to be honest but if I could change it, I would love to do so. May be in next few months.

Mumbai Part 2. Day 13.

Its just a matter of few days before the world ends. And that means all I have left, is a handful of days to make that dent that I keep talking about. But then like all humans I have this thing that makes me inept at even scratching the surface, leave alone the dent. I need things in place before I can do shit. Things like a home a corner that I could call my own, a writing place, a perfect pen and things like that.

In Delhi, thanks to my parents, all these things were on the auto pilot mode. Thanks to my parents that over a long period, painstakingly made the most perfect home they could. It has everything that I needed am used to. Of course I got spoilt in the process and it made me depend on them and things so much that I have become rigid and lethargic.

Now that I am by myself in the jungle Mumbai, I need to take care of all those things. I have spoken about em in a previous post but there are few more challenges that a Day 13 brings about compared to Day 2.

For starters, clean clothes. In Delhi as a process, I knew a place where I need to pile my dirty clothes and by some magic they would be cleaned, ironed and placed back. Here, I dont have that magic wand working for me. The friend I am piling with, the maid is like a king/queen. She adheres to certain rules. For example she shall wash clothes  merely two times a week. She shall treat each kind of cloth same. Linen shirts, cotton trousers, denims, teeshirts are all soaked together and washed with as carelessness as possible. This means my entire wardrobe looks like a vomit of color, all clothes, in Mumbai, apparently have weak colors. I can still live with this, I can go buy new things, but after she washes the clothes, she would just leave them like that. Ideally I would hang those clothes on some line and let them dry up etc but no sir, not this one.

Then there is the biggest travail of anyone's life in Mumbai. A house. I am looking to move into a 2/3 BHK with another (maybe 2) friend(s). For the same, I have been talking to brokers for last 13 days. And have posted my requirement on all the portals that advertise on TV. The places available for renting out are expensive like cocaine and yet are as bad as cheap beer. Of course that we are "bachelors", it does not help.

Food is another concern area. I am used to having a certain kind of food. Vegetarian, low on oil/fat, simple, lot of vegetables, fresh, soft, made with love etc. My mom, like all other mothers, has to arguably the best cook in the world. Here food is a challenge. The maid cooks the world's worst daal. More often than not, I am eating out and as a result getting fatter and poorer.

There are more things but I think these are the top three things that are fucking my head right now. So much that I have considered multiple times already to drop everything and go back to the protected world that I am used to. But then a few days back, I read PGs essay on how not to die. Though it was not pertinent to what I am doing here in Mumbai, it gave me some hope. And anyways, I dont call it quits because I am facing challenges (but when I get bored). So I'd stay for the time being and fight it out.

Ofcourse with time, I would fix all these things. And you know, if I can successfully move into a decent house that is airy, clean, free of pests, spacious, has terraces, is away from noise and hustle of the city, is on a high floor, the dent would have been made!

No I mean it.

On Gratitude, Restlessness and Yearning

1. The ones who know me since I was a kid, would know how huge a fan I was of Lucky Ali when I was growing up. So much so that while I was in college, I made this huge website dedicated to him (to bad it was on geocities and I dont have any copies of it). Back then, it became a reason. I couldnt stop thinking about his music and the website. I tracked every visitor and updated every broken link multiple times a day. Now, in 2012, it sounds funny and inane, considering what 19 year olds create now. But those were the days and there I was.

2. There is this show on MTV that probably is inspired by Coke Studio, which in turn is probably inspired by some other famous show from the west, that invites amazing musicians and puts them on a stage and ask them to perform their best tracks, unplugged and slightly tweaked for the live audience. And to jazz up the offering, it makes these artists talk about the music and why and how of their music. So much so that there are times you get to hear behind the scenes conversations between these guys. Nevertheless, it reveals, to some extent, what the artist was thinking while writing that song.

3. This video. And the brief interpretation of the lyrics by Lucky. And to be honest, all music by him.

4. sgMS. And everything about her. And I. And how Lucky's interpretation/reason for O Sanam is so apt, so befitting, so true about sgMs and I. And that after all these years, the realization that the song I loved as a kid will actually become a true story some day. And my story at that. 

5. Nights in Mumbai are brilliant. You may think that the city is fast asleep, but its not. Under the covers, everyone is dreaming about something or the other. Then, there are people on the road who dont really have a place to goto and there are some who dont want to goto any place and just stay on the move (like me, dunno if everyone loves the feeling of being on the move as heady as it is to me). Each lost in his/her own world. And in their dreams - after all this is the city where dreams can come true. Some of them actually do. And each person, each dream has a story that could make you envious.

6. I, alone. With nothing but music. And a million thoughts swirling around in my head. Ranging from music to life to travel to poker to money to dreams to "holocaust to quality of cucumbers in winters". And the sad bit is that I cant seem to find any answers to any of these genuine questions despite the Mensa membership and all that.

Club all the 6 above together (Apart from this list thing, I dont think I could have written this any better). I dont know the nature of resulting concoction but its like that amrit that makes you restless, fills you with gratitude and makes you yearn. All at the same time.

Restless because despite trying everything, there is something that binds you to her. Because despite trying everything you cant seem to get over her. Even her rebuttals, her insults, her public display of affection for everyone else refuse to work. And funnily she if of the same opinion.

Gratitude for people like Lucky Ali for cooking ups songs and stories like these. And for people on the streets of Mumbai. And their dreams. And all the efforts they put in. Everything gives you inspiration and hope to continue to work and pray that someday the hardwork is redeemed.

And finally, yearning. Yearning for achievement, for greatness, for immortality. And for sgMS.

Mumbai Part 2. Day 2. King of Wishful Thinking

Today was officially day 2 of my second innings in Mumbai. Hopefully this innings is as fruitful as the first one. Under this tag, I plan to chronicle my time and adventures in the city that never sleeps (who coined this term btw?)

So the day was not really special. I woke up with groggy eyes to the sound of someone banging the bedroom door. For a minute I thought it was an earthquake and someone is here to save me. But them I heard the maid yell something about no washing powder in the bathroom. Confused, I looked around and I realized it was not my bed. It wasnt even my room or my home. And this is when it dawned on me that I was in Mumbai, sleeping on the floor of a friend's room. I yelled something at the maid and looked around for some water to help me wake up. No no, I dont splash my eyes with it. My machinery needs a couple of glasses of warm salt water to get started. And lo and behold, there wasnt any water, leave alone warm, or salted. There is something about water that makes me want as much as I can. I am known to have copious amounts everyday and as a result visit the John one too many times. Wait, let me go grab my glass of water.

So no hot water, unfamiliar bed and a pesky maid beating the door started my day. Note to self, once I have a house of mine, the maid will not come until I wake up (maybe after 9 AM) and if she does come before I wake up, she shall not disturb me, at any cost.

Next up was the battle to find a place to live. I mean I cant be sleeping on this floor for rest of my life. I have to find a place that I could call my own. I have thought about it a million times, the way I would do up my place, make it my den. Too bad I cant afford a place by myself. Side note, by the end of 2013, I have to have a place just to myself. So with real estate prices going up faster than petrol and gold, I had to find a place to live quick. For, every day's delay could mean even more money to be paid as rentals. So first thing I did after I woke up, was to fill up forms on all the classified websites of the world - olx, quickr, magicbricks etc. And this is where the memories of 2007 came back. For some reason Mumbai does not want to rent out places to bachelors. Especially bald ones. I dont know why. May be its a risk profile thing, the way I had at GE for issues home loans (for example, back in 2005, if you were older than 28 and living with your parents, we couldnt give you a loan).

So I filled all the forms and it started the flurry of endless calls from brokers and "agents" who would talk more and hear less. They assumed I was someone related to Mr. Mallaya and had all the money in the world. But moment I told them that I am a bachelor, they would leave me alone, the way Mr. Mallaya was left alone in the last few days of Kingfisher (disclaimer: I am a shareholder) and have excuses as funny as, "my wife's calling me. can I call you back sir".

Finally someone, sent specially by God agreed to show us a place. Went to see it. Like if but was too expensive to afford. Such is life! Sigh!

In the meanwhile, it was time for lunch. Went ahead and feasted on amazing sandwiches and french fries. Next up was recee to a site that a friend is considering for his business (disclaimer: though its his idea and his money, I am helping him with the venture). Post that I had to drop him to the station to catch his train. A little adventure ensued.

Dropped him somehow in time and went ahead to meet another friend. This one just got promoted to a CD post, which is an achievement, considering he's got just 5 years of experience under his belt. Discussed few ideas and a lot of things with him. May get to work with him on something that we want to paddle to business schools. If I get to, it would be awesome cos he is one of the most intelligent and creative people I know and then I would be talking to college kids, something that excites me.

Dropped him and went to another friend's place who fed me her world famous Rajma Chawal. She is thinking of a venture as well. I like what she is thinking of. Dont have a lot of money but made my first angel investment (on her business). Left her place and got caught by a cop. The car I was driving, dint have papers. Had 300 bucks in the wallet. Gave 200 bucks to him. Yes, a bribe (Arvind Kejriwal and his cronies, are you reading this?) and drove back home. I wish I had the political contacts to get away without having papers and all.

And I am home, writing this and planing for the day tomorrow before I sleep. And yes before I sleep, I shall brush my teeth. Something's gotta change, now that I am in Mumbai (more on this soon).

Finally, no I did not miss sgMS. And, yes, like they say,

I'll get over you..
I know I will I'll pretend my ship's not sinking
And I'll tell myself I'm over you
'cause I'm the king of wishful thinking

I am the fucking king of wishful thinking.

P.S.: How many times did I promise something in parentheses on my blog and actually did it? Someone's keeping a tab?

Hello Neo. Hello sgMS.

This trip to Mumbai was unlike all other trips to Mumbai. There are two threads, if I may, that bind me to Mumbai. Neo and sgMS. This trip, both of them weren’t around. Both are as different as chalk and cheese and yet they are more important to me than anyone else in the world.

Neo and I went to MDI together and despite being in the same cohort, we were never friends. I knew him, he knew me and that was it. Time changed and we moved on. Somehow he landed in Mumbai for his naukri and I hopped around Chennai, Delhi and other such cities before I reached Mumbai. Mumbai has always been like that enigma for me. It has attracted me since I don’t know when and yet I never had the balls to go there by myself. Now that I was in Mumbai, I had to find my way around and unravel the mystery. I had to meet people and make friends – not that I had issues with it. I have always been very social. So, the first set of people that I met was classmates from MDI and there was this guy, Neo, amongst those.

sgMS and I are like that happy accident that you wish you met at every other crossing. To be honest I don’t even remember what our first conversation was like. But I distinctly remember when I first saw her. And I knew that I wanted to be with her. No, it was not really love at first sight but I knew we could be good friends at least. She is a typical Mumbai girl and has lived in Mumbai all her life. And like all Mumbai women, she knows how to dress well, carry herself around and has that confident air about her. She has this amazing smile that can move mountains. Her eyes are so brilliant that you could look into em for ages and get oblivious to the very concept time. Her hands, though tiny and fragile are that strong that if she held you, you can weather any storm. Nothing can trouble you when she is around.

Neo was like any other fresh MBA. Opinionated, well read and aware of the world around him. And he was like no other man that I had met. He had and still has really bad personal hygiene standards. He is lazy. He avoids all work like plague. He abhors taking responsibility. He was everything that I wasn’t. He was everything that I dint want a friend to be. And yet somehow, we became friends and got close. We realized that both of us loved to travel and loved the rush that being on the road gives you. We started heading out to small trips out of Mumbai and before we realized we were living for the weekend when we could head out of the city. There were times when we dint even know where we were headed till we reached a fork on the highway. And even there, we would toss a coin and decide. That time passed like a blur and we went to places that are not even on the map, leave alone, had amenities. We dint seem to agree on most of the things and we have had our share of arguments. But with time, these trips and the arguments, the friendship developed into something that cant be explained with words. People even started cracking jokes at us for our “love hate relationship”. Both of us loved to hate each other. We still do. Bastard.

sgMS on the contrary is miles away from being a MBA material and that’s probably why she knows more about life and people than most people I know. Very pragmatic and very good at what she does. She is probably the goddess of cleanliness and orderliness. She hates any kind of kachra and does not hesitate in lashing with her mile long tongue if she spots anything amiss. She is calm and has that serene air about her. Compare it to my excited-all-the-time countenance. If I am yin, she is the yang. She complements me. Completes me. It’s as if when God was making me, he took a part of me and carved another human out of it. sgMS. Individually we are great at what we do but if we could be together, we could redefine awesomeness. That’s how “made for each other” we are. But then she and I had the weirdest relationship in the history of mankind. She knew that she liked me but she hated the way I was. It was a classical battle between her heart and her mind. She obviously gives more heed to her head and we aren’t together. I on the other hand, I loved her. Still do. And I knew that if we were to end up together, I would have a tough time with my parents and other such societal shit. Again this was a typical heart and mind battle where my heart refuses to let go.

Neo loves Mumbai more than anything else that we humans are capable of loving. So much so that he has declared to himself and everyone around him that he would not leave this city ever. What is strange is that Mumbai is an epitome of everything that he dislikes – hunger, poverty and humidity. And yet he loves the city. More than even Milind Gunaji. Mumbai, though is a city that he has adopted (or the city that has adopted him, as he says), he knows it as if he himself was the chief architect and planted the buildings, the alleys, Marine Drive and other such landmarks of the city, at his whims. Everything that characterizes Mumbai – the dilapidated buildings, the tiny alleys, the food joints, the Parsi cafes, the crowded local trains, the Marine Drive, anything – Neo seems to know about the history and importance of each tiny speck, in the grand scheme of things. I at times wonder if those stories are genuine or are cooked up. Even if they are cooked up, they make for a fascinating earpiece. If only Neo wasn’t lazy, he could have written it down and shared with the world. In it, we have a sure winner on our hands and a bigger hit than any other piece of text written about Mumbai. Someday I need to cajole him into writing an anthology about Mumbai. And for the same, maybe I will ask him to use a Pseudonym (Bajirao Singham?).

sgMS probably loves Mumbai more than Neo does. Though with Neo’s unwavering determination, I couldn’t be sure. Her love for Mumbai probably stems from her lineage – her family has been in Mumbai for more than three generations. She was born and has grown up in Mumbai and knows the nooks and crannies like the veins on the back of her hand. She knows where you get that best pao bhaji, where is that perfect place to sit and stare at the sea, what gully to take to reach Bandra the fastest, what store to go to buy that perfect gift, which is the most happening night club, what shop would give the best bargains and other such things. And the best part is that she is not just attached to Mumbai per se but she is very fond of her motherland of Maharashtra and her culture. Her love for all things Maharashtrian is legendary. She is proud of all the great Marathas – from Shivaji to Ambedkar to Mangeshkar to Tendulkar and all the Kar’s of the future! She loves all the festivals that bring the spirit of Maharastrians alive – from Gudi Parwa to Ganesh Chaturthi to Bhau Beej to Diwali. And she loves to gorge on all the typical Maharastrian delicacies – from Kaanda Poha to Vada Paos to Puran Poli to Modaks and everything else. If there could be a title of The Official PR Agent of the State of Maharashtra, sgMS would do a wonderful job.

The comparison and contrast between the two faces of Mumbai – Neo’s and sgMS’s could go on forever. Both of them have made me experience their respective sides of Mumbai and I cant disrespect either by attempting to pick one. Too bad they don’t know each other well and they couldn’t compare notes – it would have made an engaging battle of opinions, if not anything else. Neo would sit with his back to the chair, legs on the table and arms folded behind his head. sgMS would be standing on her feet, her arms making those gestures that only she can come up with and her eyes more animated than her face. Neo would use things like "but hear me out", "you don’t like me", "kise pata chalega", "trust me" etc. sgMS on the other hand would say things like "you are kidding me", "balls" etc. And since both of them have really really strong opinions and both of them hate to lose, I dont think the argument would end but it would make for an awesome sight.

There is so much more that I could talk about here. I could talk about Neo, sgMS or Mumbai. Or about all three of them. But I honestly believe in the power of things that are left unsaid after a long monologue. I'd let the readers decide who this piece was about. To close this, I'd saay that Mumbai to me is thus this place that the thrifty Neo loves and fancy sgMS adores. With the two of them with me in Mumbai, I experienced life like I had never done before. Thank you guys. Thank you Neo. Thank you sgMS. Thank you Mumbai.

What am I doing in Mumbai?

I am in Mumbai for next few days. While I am here, I will try and do the following.

1. Try and see if there is a business case of establishing a marketing services company here. It sounds like a tough task considering Mumbai is a crowded market and has tons of existing players that are fairly entrenched. But then my employer is footing the bill and I cant complain. If you can help, please lemme know.  
2. I'd try and get fit. I am fat and that too in an ugly way. Here, despite erratic eating schedules, I will try and control what I eat. For starters I will stop having dinners. At Vipassana, we were taught to survive  on two meals. It helps in better digestion, if not anything else. And it may teach me self control, in terms of telling yourself not to eat when you have daal makhani and paranthas served to you...
3. My first short story is almost done. Will try to finish it while I am here. With all the madness in Delhi, it was really tough to work on it. While I am here, I will have time on my hands to work on it. And since I have decided to try and publish it myself on Amazon, I will explore that bit as well. 

So three big things that I want to do in life. Create a business, get fit and start writing. Am on my way fellas. Thats it for the time being. Do lemme know if you could help on any of these three things!

Romancing the city of Mumbai

There is something about Mumbai that makes it special. As special as your first love is.

I mean, as on last count, I have been to at least 34 different cities, across 4 continents and yet there is something, something about Mumbai that keeps calling me back. Back to its arms, the hug, the embrace, the womb, if I may. You know, its like that illicit love affair that you know wont take you anywhere and yet you cant get out of. Wait, you can get out, if you try. You just dont want to. Coming back, in my case, I think the reason why I keep coming back, the obvious suspects are Neo and sgMS. And may be all those amazing memories that I have, of times, people and places that I have enjoyed while I was living in Mumbai.

This time, on one of those impulse trips to Mumbai, as I was landing in Mumbai, I realized something that I had never noticed in the past. Funny how you still notice new things about Mumbai even though you have been here a million times. Mumbai looks amazing at nights. Amazing because I dont have a better word to paint the picture. Its as decked up like a bride is on her wedding day. Probably better.

The city is showered with amber lights. For some reason, that's the only colour of street lights in the entire city. May be it is easier to spot, cheaper to install/maintain or whatever but the effect is, all the more, electrifying. Things get accentuated when they are under the amber light. You actually begin to notice things that you never cared to even glance at. Take street boards for example. The boards that have pincodes and the official names of the roads on them. The blue ones. Before I saw them with amber tint, at night, I dint even know that they existed in the first place.

You see a different side of Mumbai at nights. The roads are not as narrow as you know them from your "interactions" during the day. They are wide. Wide enough for you to zip around in your car and actually overtake other vehicles. The pesky rickshaws and taxis from the day, are parked in perfect neat rows along the sidewalks. All the filth and garbage you try to avoid during the day, is mysteriously gone. And so are all the signs of life. The beggars, the hawkers and the urchins that create that constant cacophony during the day, are all sound asleep and only sound that they make at nights is when they're snoring.

And then, when most people are off to sleep, when everyone but the romantics are still awake, the ones who love the city the most, come out. The cops, the whores, the chai and cigarette sellers on bicycles, the omelet hawkers, and the romantics. The romantics, the ones who just want to be left alone with their love. The city of Mumbai.


P.S.: Of course Mumbai never sleeps and you can get stuck in traffic jams at even 2 in the night. But then, that's select busy intersections. Right? And at least the romantic in me refuses to believe that Mumbai never sleeps. It does. See it for yourself next time you are out. At night.


P.P.S.: Trying too hard :D

An Ode to Mumbai

As a kid I really wanted to live in Mumbai some day. Not that I wanted to be a film star but I had heard about Mumbai so much in movies and other popular entertainment devices that I had to experience the place. Somehow some stars did some funny jig and I landed in Mumbai in 2007. This was my first job after my MBA and I had my sis and a few classmates from college who lived in Mumbai. And thats all the people I knew.

So one fine day I landed in Mumbai and boy, was I was glad to be here! One thing led to another and eventually I ended up spending bout 3 years in Mumbai. In these three years I did change my job, converted those classmates into awesome friends, made a ton of new friends, learnt a lot about life and work (blame/credits goes to my ex boss), found this woman who I knew I could spend rest of my life with, developed an insatiable hunger for money, realized that life is more than a 9 to 6 job and pleasing your boss and traveled through the length and breadth of this amazing state called Maharashtra amongst other things. And as a result, grew (or may be evolved?) as a person. All in all I had a wonderful time in Mumbai. There was something about the place that I cant pinpoint that made the city dear to me. So much so that I keep coming back at some pretext or the other.

Anyways, like all love affairs, the crush on Mumbai ended as suddenly as it had happened. I had decided that I have had enough of working for someone else and I needed to take command of my destiny. I decided to move back to Delhi and try my hand at something. Kunal and I started Cyntax (we shut it down in less than six months, more about it some other day). I moved onto another job within Delhi. The thought of finding work in Mumbai didnt even strike me. With time, memories and passions faded and Mumbai became a yet another dot on the map that I had been to.

Today, on a Saturday morning, as I write this, I am in Mumbai and staring at a weekend ahead of me. I am not excited about being here and I am wondering what was it back then that made me alive when I lived here back then. The obvious suspects are people. I had the fortune of making some of my best friends here and every day there was something or the other we kept planning. I hated antics of my friends and yet there was something endearing about them. Not that they arent here anymore but then something is missing.

The other key suspect is opportunities that Mumbai made possible. This was the first time and place where I had the power of bumping into some hot shot and pick his brains. I could meet so many interesting people, almost on daily basis, and rack brains with them. I could think on brands, business, the state of nation and other useless thing. I felt alive with all the useless mental masturbation I was engaged in.

Then may be it was the umpteen opportunities to hit the road. Mumbai is perfect for short weekend trips. You can take your car (or your bike) and practically goto hundreds of places. While I lived in Mumbai, I traveled out on most weekends and explored mountains, rivers, dams, hill stations, roads, people and cultures. Mostly my partner in crime was Neo and there were times when we'd hit the road and then decide on the destination. As they say, we weren't intent on arriving. For us it was about the journey. The roads are a perfect escape from all the miseries. It lets you free your mind of all the bullshit thats occupying your head and allows you to start afresh. It is also a great thinking tool. And since you are on the road and driving, there is no way you can spoil the free thinking by taking notes and scribbling ideas. The roads are exhilarating. Like Red says, the excitement that a free man has, when he is about to start a journey, the travel excited me more than any other endeavor. May be I need to become a Raju Guide or something?

Or was it the freedom? Because Mumbai is probably the only city in the country where you can find public transport, food, people at all hours. And all these are accessible and not limited to a select few. Or was it the beautiful buildings and lanes that crowd the town side? Or the vastness of Navi Mumbai? Or was it the frequent star spotting? After all Mumbai is home to bollywood and cricket and the tryst with so many stars so often only make the possibility of you becoming one, real! Isn't that what attracts most of people who land up in Mumbai? Not the stardom, but the hope. The desire. And the opportunity.

Obviously there are things that I loath about Mumbai (read bad roads, politicians, traffic etc) but I then guess if I could put things on a weighing scale, the bad things would not make an iota of difference to awesomeness that is Mumbai. Like they say you need to be here to be able to see things for yourself. If you havent had the opportunity to experience Mumbai yet, you need to pack your bags and plan a trip soon. Wait, no need to even pack bags, why waste time in frivolities of the modern life? Nomads were so much cooler!

And in the end, thank you Mumbai for touching my life and giving me everything that you have showered on me. And for all the things that you are yet to gift me!

Salaam Mumbai!

P.S.: This post was meant to be a rant AGAINST Mumbai and while writing this I realize I couldn't come up with anything against Mumbai. I think I need to fix shit in my head rather than blaming it on Mumbai.