Dear sgMS,

Dear sgMS,

I am back! Did you miss me? Of course not May be (this year, I am going to be ambitious, as a friend told another). Did I miss you? Hell yeah! No moment goes by when I dont think of you, about you, about the times we were together. And I wish those days could be back.

You know, as I write this when I wrote this, I am was at the international airport, taking a flight to Delhi. And because my domestic flight is from the international airport, I am surrounded by all these signs that point to all these fancy destinations and all these people going to all these fancy destinations. It suddenly dawned on me that I want to travel the world with you. I want to hold your hand while I am lost in those cramped alleys in Europe, when I am marveling at the national parks in the US, when I am lost on some highway somewhere in Australia, when I am up in the air heading to one of these fancy destinations, when I am scared to jump off the plane for my maiden skydive and so one and so forth. I want to click stupid selfies on top of the Eiffel tower. I want to sit on the benches on the river fronts. I want to laze at the airports. I want to listen to the music lying the hotel rooms. I want to be close to you in a crowded local train. I want to sneak in to your bed at some hostel while the floor creaks and wakes up everyone around. And I dont know how many more such things.

You know I want it all. And more. For the rest of my life.

Remember I wrote you a letter on our last trip? I know it was kind of long - it spilled over into 4 pages - and I had a hard time cutting it short. With you around, there is just so much to say. So much to do. So many memories to make. 

You know,  I want to grow old with you. I want to stuff a house with things that we may or may not need. A friend says most women are hoarders and like most women, you are too. I want to see you hoard all those things that I otherwise do not approve of. I want to live with you in a cosy house (I know you dont like lavish places) and I want us to frequent a cafe close to our place and do our things - you could doodle and I could play the guitar. I want us to argue over those simple silly things like giving my PIN to the waiter for punching my bill. I want you to yell at me for all my careless mistakes like leaving my card back at the restaurant. I want to fuck up the pronunciation of Parpal and February. I want you to correct me while I give you reasons for my wrong pronunciations. I want to do all those things that people do over their lifetimes.

Thing is, this is new to me. I have never imagined that I would be old. I know that I have missed the bus and I wont be richer or cooler or famous ever. I will at best be a typical mango man and I may get to drive a nice car and own a 2-and-a-half BHK in some far-off suburb in Mumbai but I will never be what I have wanted to be. But if somehow that makes you happy and content and peaceful, I think I am ok with it. I realize that I will not be forever young and I will be forgotten the next second I die. The thing thus is, while I am here, I want to be with you and make the most of my time here. That's all there is to life I think (selfish I know).

But this is about you. Not about me. So coming back, I want to be with you and grow old with you. I want to be around when you get those spects. I want to hide your spects and hold up two fingers and lie that I am holding up three. I want to pull your cheeks and scream googly woogly mush. I want you to cook something and make a face at you while you croon in horror and then laugh at you. Oh man, there is so much that I want to do with you..

You know what? I cant write no more. I miss you so bad it hurts!

I do!

Hope you come back.

P.S.: I did not cheat on you. I promise I did not. Tere sar ki kasam.

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