Like most projects, this started with an impulse. And like all things that I do, I put the impulse in action. See this tweet.
So, what is it?
In one line, I will try and get a 100 rejection letters #in2018.
What is a rejection? What is a rejection letter?
Lemme try and example with an example. What if I ask a Rabbi Shergill if I can work with him? Afterall I've been a fan and all that since his Bulla days. His music and his philosophy has been a big big reason of my fandom.
However, there is no clear value proposition for a Rabbi Shergill to choose to work with me. And there no reason why he should accept me!
So, in all probability, he will reject the request. Assuming that he will get time to see my request - he being busy and famous at the same time! If he gets back to him and says that he doesnt want to work with me, that to me is a rejection.
Other example, when I travel for work, can I ask for the client to pay for a business class ticket (about 3x the price of an economy ticket)? I know I am not important enough for most of my clients to give me a superior treatment. The request will probably get rejected. Assuming I am not laughed at. Ok this was a bad example. Because this is a recurring event. Everytime I fly, I want to travel business. May be it is not. Some clients may reject. Some may not. Some may give in. Some may not, Some projects could have budget. Some may not. Need to think more.
The definition of rejection (for the sake of this project) thus, is an ask that I know is almost impossible to get. The ask is so big, so audacious, so stupid, so ridiculous that it is bound to get rejected. The ask that I shouldnt be making in the first place. And since the ask if going to get rejected, I'd not feel bad when it is rejected.
So, I will send a request. And the person, company he can choose to ignore it, accept it or reject it. Unless I get a feedback from him, I will not put this in any basket. I'd just call it waiting for inputs.
The next step is kinda fuzzy. What if you dont hear back (either acceptance or rejection), you send a reminder? Of course you could sound creepy (or desperate). Or you could sound enterprising and persistent and all. I am not sure of this one. Will think and update it over time. #note2self.
How did I get the idea?
Three things had to come together to make this happen.
A. I saw this TED talk by Jia and I have been meaning to implement it. Why? Because its a social experiment and it makes you get out of your comfort zone. Its been on the todo list but I never got around to it. May be this is the time?
B. I met Hareesh Sir and talked to him about my failure to grow business at C4E. He said that unless you get rejected a million times, you cant say you have failed. So, I want to get rejected.
C. I saw this tweet and was surprised to know that people achieve such amazing feats that it makes you go wow! And like you, they are made of same chemical components and all that. So, if they can, why cant you? Kiki worked towards getting a 100 rejection letters. That means that at the response rate of about 1%, she would've taken 10000 shots! If she can, why cant I?
And why would I want to get rejected these many times?
I think the biggest thing we fear as humans is, "what if I get rejected!" or "what would the world say." By getting rejected a 100 times in the next 6-7 months, I will probably get over the fear. Jia did. Kiki probably did. I can too.
Plus, if I do get rejected, I can tell myself that the ask was so big that it was anyway gonna get rejected. I would thus probably feel little less bad.
Three things had to come together to make this happen.
A. I saw this TED talk by Jia and I have been meaning to implement it. Why? Because its a social experiment and it makes you get out of your comfort zone. Its been on the todo list but I never got around to it. May be this is the time?
B. I met Hareesh Sir and talked to him about my failure to grow business at C4E. He said that unless you get rejected a million times, you cant say you have failed. So, I want to get rejected.
C. I saw this tweet and was surprised to know that people achieve such amazing feats that it makes you go wow! And like you, they are made of same chemical components and all that. So, if they can, why cant you? Kiki worked towards getting a 100 rejection letters. That means that at the response rate of about 1%, she would've taken 10000 shots! If she can, why cant I?
And why would I want to get rejected these many times?
I think the biggest thing we fear as humans is, "what if I get rejected!" or "what would the world say." By getting rejected a 100 times in the next 6-7 months, I will probably get over the fear. Jia did. Kiki probably did. I can too.
Plus, if I do get rejected, I can tell myself that the ask was so big that it was anyway gonna get rejected. I would thus probably feel little less bad.
And finally if I hit acceptance, I am sure it would make like better! Oh, this also means that I need to choose what I need to get an acceptance on. I need a filter. So, the process, the model is, when I chase rejections, in case I do get an acceptance on it, the resulting #win has to take me closer to my three lifeGoals (Everest, Billion People, Billion Dollars). This is how my project differs from that of Jia’s.
So, what is the plan?
Rather than putting a strict goal, task frequency, cadence etc, I will try and get a 100 rejections in this year. These would be a mix of personal, work, random and otherwise.
Oh, I made the first request already. To Rabbi Shergill. Let's see what do I get.
I will catalog all my requests and rejections on this post. And on this twitter thread.
List of all requests.
#1. 8Jun18. No response yet.
Requested Rabbi Shergill to meet me and allow me to work with him.
#2. NoDate. No response yet.
Requested a professor from MDI if I could work with him on creating a new model for marketing. He showed initial interest but nothing happened after that.
#3. NoDate. No response yet.
Requested the dean at SPJain if I could meet him and may be teach at SPJ.
#4. 24Jun18. No response yet.
Requested another professor at another business school if I could teach at his.
UPDATE: This updating of the blog was getting way too much. Tracking it on an open Google Sheet. Link here.
***
Thats about it! Wish me luck! And do try it for yourself.
Thank you. Over and out.
SG
PS: Can I turn this on the head and rather gun for 100 acceptances? And that means I will have to ask for a million things (assuming 1 in 100 is granted). Need to think. #note2self.
PPS: I love how this blog is becoming a dialogue with self. I just wish I could find a way to catalog these thoughts and share these with people that I trust and value and then get them to debate with me on the outcomes. Any ideas anyone?
PPPS: What if I say that rather than trying to feel less bad about getting rejected, how about I try harder and get it? I think I cant do that because for a scatterbrain like me, I simply cant go deep with everything!
PPPPS: Rant ahead.
Not a bad theory to subscribe to. As long as I take shots at each of these things.
And to take a shot at these things, I need access. Access to people, ideas, resources, capital, time and all those things. And more importantly, I need permission. Again, from people and others that will enable those things. And acceptance that they'd help me. Thing is, acceptance to me is the biggest gift (apart from attention) that you can give someone. And since acceptance is such a big deal, you often dont get it!
Coming back.
I need to do a million things and often I dontget to those even start working on things because I assume that the other person, that the thing is dependent on, will reject the idea. And this fear of rejection is the biggest bane to getting things done!
So, I thought, can I fix it? Can I somehow get over this fear of rejection!
One of the mental models that I subscribe to, is, Invert, always invert. In one line, the idea is that if you reverse the problem you are facing, you often get to the solution. You know that thing where the guy says if he knew where is he gonna die, he'd never go there? That! This entire fear of rejection looked like an interesting problem to apply this mental model on.
And hence, I started with the thesis that if I chase rejections (rather than permission, acceptance etc.), I will probably do well! Ergo, this post and the project.
Rather than putting a strict goal, task frequency, cadence etc, I will try and get a 100 rejections in this year. These would be a mix of personal, work, random and otherwise.
Oh, I made the first request already. To Rabbi Shergill. Let's see what do I get.
I will catalog all my requests and rejections on this post. And on this twitter thread.
List of all requests.
#1. 8Jun18. No response yet.
Requested Rabbi Shergill to meet me and allow me to work with him.
#2. NoDate. No response yet.
Requested a professor from MDI if I could work with him on creating a new model for marketing. He showed initial interest but nothing happened after that.
#3. NoDate. No response yet.
Requested the dean at SPJain if I could meet him and may be teach at SPJ.
Requested another professor at another business school if I could teach at his.
UPDATE: This updating of the blog was getting way too much. Tracking it on an open Google Sheet. Link here.
***
Thats about it! Wish me luck! And do try it for yourself.
Thank you. Over and out.
SG
PS: Can I turn this on the head and rather gun for 100 acceptances? And that means I will have to ask for a million things (assuming 1 in 100 is granted). Need to think. #note2self.
PPS: I love how this blog is becoming a dialogue with self. I just wish I could find a way to catalog these thoughts and share these with people that I trust and value and then get them to debate with me on the outcomes. Any ideas anyone?
PPPS: What if I say that rather than trying to feel less bad about getting rejected, how about I try harder and get it? I think I cant do that because for a scatterbrain like me, I simply cant go deep with everything!
PPPPS: Rant ahead.
So there are a million things that I want to do in life and because there is one life and anything you want to do takes time to do, its humanly impossible to do all those. But then I may argue that if I attempt to do all these million things, I will probably end up doing a handful of those. And that to me is a #win automatically.
Not a bad theory to subscribe to. As long as I take shots at each of these things.
And to take a shot at these things, I need access. Access to people, ideas, resources, capital, time and all those things. And more importantly, I need permission. Again, from people and others that will enable those things. And acceptance that they'd help me. Thing is, acceptance to me is the biggest gift (apart from attention) that you can give someone. And since acceptance is such a big deal, you often dont get it!
Coming back.
I need to do a million things and often I dont
So, I thought, can I fix it? Can I somehow get over this fear of rejection!
One of the mental models that I subscribe to, is, Invert, always invert. In one line, the idea is that if you reverse the problem you are facing, you often get to the solution. You know that thing where the guy says if he knew where is he gonna die, he'd never go there? That! This entire fear of rejection looked like an interesting problem to apply this mental model on.
And hence, I started with the thesis that if I chase rejections (rather than permission, acceptance etc.), I will probably do well! Ergo, this post and the project.
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