Untitled - 19 Feb 2014

Its been sometime since I posted something here. I mean I have been posting things but they have been more of updates on the book. At least the last four posts have been about the book. Here, go see the FB page of the book.

So, remember those heydays of blogging where one would post things regularly even though they didn't have anything to talk about? Where updates were more about mundane things? Where I wrote because I loved writing? Lemme get back those days.

So today, I dont have anything to talk about. The post is called untitled and I dont have anything special to write about. Lemme try and write without a reason.

Lets get started. With the last few days. They've been really interesting. I got to travel to Bali for free (got an opportunity to freelance with my ex-employer) and I had a ball. When I had a dopplr account, I would log in all my trips and miles. Now that is gone, I don't know where to log these things. I merely save the boarding cards and hopefully someday when I am old I would try and look at these boarding cards, I may feel good about these trips. When I was quitting my job to write full-time, I had thought that I would miss the crazy travels. But as luck would have it, I have travelled more since I quit. Thanks heavens for that.

Next up, the book. It's done. I mean the first draft. I now need a publisher to help me get it out in the market. Lets see when that happens. But I am happy to have finished the draft. I had no clue that I could write one full-length book. Took a lot of coercion and motivation but I finally did it. You may read about the journey here.

The other exciting thing is that two very important couples are having babies. One in Mumbai and one in the US of A. The very fact that they are having babies makes me nervous. The very concept of babies is nerve-wrecking. Its like getting a new life to the world. I dont know where my life is headed and here are people, getting babies in the world. And these are intelligent, smart people. Their decisions have been informed and planned. All the best to the couples and the babies on the way.

Talking about where life is headed, the reason for move to Mumbai, the book, is over. I need to now take a call about the future. I absolutely hate this bit, the one where I am supposed to plan and all that. But I have to do it. A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Next few days, I will try to figure out something that I could work on. And then go wherever life takes me. The thing is, whatever decision I make, I know that on one side is chase of glory and that illusive shiny goal. The other side is a life of mediocrity. More than anyone else, I am the judge and I am the jury. Worse, I am the executioner.

The other trouble is that I dont know what that goal it. I merely have vague inklings. Maybe its not for me. Maybe all the ambition that I believe I am full of, its of now use. I dont know. I have conflicting thoughts right now. Maybe in a few days I get some clarity. Hopefully I would.

Anyhow, the next thing is that I have started to play chess in my free time. Read free as transit and waiting. I tried reading but I could not. I can definitely not write. And I cant talk as its almost too noisy all the time.

Finally, if there is one blog that you ought to subscribe, even at the cost of others, I'd recommend James Altucher. He's my spiritual, mental and emotional guru. Ever since I have started reading him, my life has changed for good. No kidding. Read a few posts and you would know what I am talking about.

Oh, I am starting a new project. I call it the newsletter. The plan is to curate links and text from the world wide web and send the curated list to friends that I think would want to read. In fact I want to claim that if you are marketeer in the Internet era, you better read the list. The idea and inspiration comes from something I did when I was at CLA, where amongst other things, I curated cool things that the agency people ought to know. I am merely expanding the scope. This is a list of things that every thinking marketeer and entrepreneur needs to know.

If all goes well, I would send the first letter out this weekend. If you want it, please subscribe here.

Email Address *

And thats about it! For this edition of untitled. Hope you enjoyed it!

The first set of reviewers for tnks

First published on The Nidhi Kapoor Story's blog.

Just a couple of minutes ago, I sent out the first draft of #tnks to a few friends. Friends. Not literary critics. Not nitpickers. Not reviewers. Not editors. Simple folk like me. Who may someday want to pick up the book from the bookstores. The ones that I know want to see me succeed. The ones who were around when I needed them. Through thick and thin.

Thank you guys. In advance. For reading the the raw, uncut version. The one that would contain most mistakes. The one that would be toughest to read. The one that would be blander than tasteless wine.

To be honest, I had finished the draft almost half a month ago but then I had this serious case of butterflies in my stomach that I did not want to send it. I was am scared about opinions. I am scared of comments, reviews that the story would elicit. The ones I have sent to, they are my best friends but they are also my toughest critics. They are the ones who would not hold anything back. They would be brutal. And to be honest, I may not be ready for the brutality. After all, this is the first time I am doing something entirely by myself.

But guess these things have to be done. Someone, I think Murakami, said something about the pain that a butterfly has to go through to come out of its chrysalis. Honestly, I am not capable of understanding these heavy words and metaphysical emotions but I do know that I need to live through this pain if I want #tnks to see light of the day.

That's it for the update at this time. I am assuming that my friends would take a few weeks to get back to me. Lets see what they come up with. Till then, I would start thinking on the next one. And may be, start talking to a few publishers or agents.

In the meanwhile, if anyone wants to read, do write in.

Next steps on #tnks

Its done! I have finished the first draft of The Nidhi Kapoor Story.

What? Did you ask what is The Nidhi Kapoor Story? Are you living under a rock or something?

I can talk about excitement, exhilaration, fear, butterflies in the stomach, emptiness and all that. But let me park those because for the time being, I want to focus on the tasks at hand first.

This proximity to the finish line means that I need to find answers to a few very important questions that would determine the fate of the book. And my future as a full-time writer.

Here is an indicative list of things that need done. Pronto.

1. Find an editor. Someone to painstakingly go through the first draft, find all the mistakes that I've made. Mistakes in terms of plot, grammar, sentence formation, structure etc. 
2. Find a designer. To help me make marketing collaterals and design other miscellaneous things. Yes, I have asked everyone who has the word "design" in their bio. And everyone has refused so far. I don't know why. I don't know what am doing wrong here. Help!! 
3. Find a publisher. Or an agent. Someone who know how this "industry" works. Someone who could help the book see the light of the day. 
4. Create a marketing plan. I may claim to be an aware marketeer, but I need to put the plan on paper. And more importantly, execute it.

All this, under the constrains enforced by joblessness and limited "financial leverage".

Not to mention that I am on a constant lookout for the next career opportunity, after all, the money that I had saved all this while, is about to run out. Help me? This is my LinkedIn profile.

God? Tooth fairy? Bhagwan? Jezus? Anyone? Please? 

Addicted. To Writing.

Hotlinked from here.

Yesterday, I was meeting a friend and we were talking about life and all that. So, she's like my soul guru. I can bare my soul to her and yet not worry about making a fool of myself. Even if I do make a fool of myself, I don't mind. She knows how to put me at peace. She is brilliant like that. So, while talking to her, I said something that I had never realized before. That's the thing about her. Anyway, I said...

Every night when I go home and I think about the way I've spent the day gone by, if I realize that I haven't written 1000 words, I feel shitty about the day. Really shitty. 

And then I said,

Over time I have got addicted to the good feeling that only comes to me when I know that I wrote something during the day.

Wow! That was some writing. I am not even counting the number of bugs in there. Thats the exercise for someone else. Some editor or a grammar nazi. Are you one? I am looking for an editor for my book. Lemme know. 

The bottom-line is, I am addicted. To writing. And I am happy about it. I just want to indulge more and more into it. Get addicted more and more. Till it becomes terminal. Terminal as in terminal. Terminal like terminally-ill.

Like most other addicts, when they get terminally addicted, the thing they are addicted to, gets short-supplied. I am no different.

Similarly, now that I am addicted to writing, I dont know what to write. The book that I was writing? Even that is now done. The first draft of the book is done (you may like the FB page here), I don't know what to write. I do have the next plot but with it, I am in that phase when I am passively thinking about it. That's the process I follow. Think about things passively. Passively as in think absent-mindedly about things. Till they take up shape. Till I get some clarity. Till I know what it would be. And then I start writing. And write everyday. At least 1000 words. Till I get stuck. And then I repeat the process.

So, I dont know what to do. I dont know how to feed in this addiction. And the fact that I cant feed to this addiction, its killing me.

Help me. Somehow. Please.

Draft 1 of #tnks done!

Originally posted here.

As a kid, every time I saw this “That’s all Folks!” signage and heard the accompanying cheery music that came along with it, I got really sad and depressed. Sad as in SAD. S A D. Depressed as in DEPRESSED. D E P R E S S E D.

Why? Because the amazing cartoon that I was watching (Looney Tunes more often than not) was coming to an end. And I did not want it to end. I would cry because it was coming to an end. Since I could not control what started and ended when on the TV, I would cry all the more at my helplessness.

Today, years later, yet another thing came to an end. Something that I did not want to end. Something that I could prevent from ending and yet I let it end. I’d come to it in a bit. Meanwhile, I want to talk about the new-found respect I have for the guys who thought of “That’s all Folks!”. For, today, I realized that the end means conclusion. An end. The “That’s all Folks!” marked the beginning of the end. So that other things may be started. In fact, everything we do eventually comes to an end. It has to. That’s how the world has been designed by Mother Nature. And rather than crying about it, cribbing about it, we need to embrace it. With open arms. When something ends, we need to go forth. And celebrate it. We need to start looking forward to next. Start preparing for the next. We need to go on. Must go on. To the next adventure. To open that next door that beacons at us. The next dark alley that has always lured us. The unknown.

Ok, ok. I’d stop. There is more that I can talk about end but I need to end the rant. To talk about the next. I don’t know what that next is. I mere have a vague idea. I’d come to it in a bit. But I know what I ended today. The first draft of #tnks.

Took me 6+ months, 3 missed deadlines, 80K+ words, 240+ pages, 2 laptops, innumerable coffees and countless rickshaw rides to nearest Starbucks to work on the first draft. And today I finally completed the first draft of the book.

It also required me to quit my job, eat out of my savings and rely on temporary jobs to pay my bills. All said and done, this journey was totally worth it. I now know at least one thing that I want to do in life.

Am I good at it? Will I be appreciated? Can I make a living out of it? Can I make a dent? Jury is still out but I am willing to put in effort and wait for it.

For the time being, the big news is that that I have managed to finish the first draft of the book. And now that I have completed the first draft of the book, what is next? Two things. A, get some friends that I trust to read / review the book. And B, start talking to publishers, agents, designers, editors and other such people.

Over the next few weeks, I shall do so. And like every-time, I shall keep you guys posted.

Monthly Report - Jan 2014

The first month of 2014 is over. Its went past by so fast that I am wondering if someone hit the Fast Forward button on the remote control of the Matrix that we are hanging in. I had made elaborate plans for the month and had promised myself that I'd do so much that I'd leave my 30+ years of existence to shame.

But the malfunction at the matrix ensued that I did zilch. I mean not exactly zilch but when I compare it to other things, its more or less zilch. Anyway, the point of a report card it to evaluate how I did. Here is a list.

Here are the things that I did in this month. 

1. Finished the first draft of The Nidhi Kapoor Story. Now I need to send the draft to friends, look for an editor and a publisher. If you know how to go about publishing, please help. 
2. Ran out of money that I had saved while I was with Gravity. Now that the first draft of the book is done and I am out of money, I need to find something that pays me enough to pay my bills in Mumbai. I am in the job market now. 
3. I took steps towards the inch loss goal that I have set for myself for the end of the year. These are yoga, walking and swimming. 
4. This month, I also complete ten years of blogging. I started writing this blog in Jan of 2004 and its been ten years. Like I keep saying, apart from living and dreaming, this is the only activity that I have done for so long. This is the post that I wrote about it. 

I missed the following things this month.

1. I had listed a few writing projects. I haven't been able to work on any. Its a long list. I have them archived on my Evernote. I shall try to initiate those in Feb. 

In Feb 2014, I would do the following.

1. Work on Capt Obvious. Its a blog about brands and businesses. 
2. Launch ISIN. Finally. I have been thinking on this for some time now. Its about time I did it.
3. Start the next plot. I have a vague idea. I want to retell a classic, set in modern context. 
4. Sell sgElectra. I know. Sell. :(
5. Do things that I was supposed to do in Jan. Ref Evernote. 

That's it. I hope to make these report cards every month. I think I did sometime in the past but I cant seem to recall. Over a period of time, I would try to put tangibles in these cards. For example, I'd say that I wrote 20000 words this months or I spent 30% less than last month or something like that.

I can try and make this report on a non-public forum. I did a pros and cons analysis. I realized that by putting these online, I give myself an outside chance of bumping into people that may help me with these goals. If I do this bit on evernote, I lose out on the opportunity.

Lets see when I do that. You may want to read tnks blog in the meanwhile.

P.S. Thanks James. Really really appreciate all that you write.

10 Years of blogging

10-dulkar!

I don't believe it.

Its been 10 years since I started writing on this blog. Ten years. TEN YEARS! Ten long years.

Its a lot and lot of time. Its, its half of my adult life! Since my first post on this blog in Jan of 2004, I have come a long way. Some1293 posts, except this one. These ten years and 1293 posts, what a ride it's been.

If I can make tall claims, whatever I am today, this blog has had a very very large part to play in it. I am not a big deal but I am an aware individual and the act of researching and writing this blog opened my mind to a lot of things. If not for the want of writing better posts, I would've overlooked those things.

With the advantage of hindsight, the decision in 2004, to start a blog, is probably amongst the best decisions that I made in my life. Ever.

This blog, like I said earlier, it's been one hell of a ride. And oh man, did I enjoy it?

Along the way I've made a lot of friends, that otherwise would've remained inaccessible to me.
Along the way I learnt things that I would've otherwise oblivious to.
Along the way I developed the courage to go ask questions, at places, where it would've been a sin.
Along the way I realized that I loved the act of putting the words together and constructing sentences and coherent pieces. Well some were, still are, incoherent. But I realized that I loved writing.

Let me talk about writing. Probably the biggest takeaway from this blog.

While I was writing for those invisible readers, few and far between, I tried my hands at different things. I tried to write fiction, non-fiction, poems and what not. Even tnks, my first attempt at full-length fiction started on this blog.

If not for this blog, I would've never thought that I'd write the book. Actually this blog is a classic example of serendipity in action. How? Let me explain.

When I started writing this blog, I could write a single sentence without making grammatical errors. I still make quite a few. After all, English did not come naturally to me. I had to work hard for it. But once I got hooked to writing I started making efforts to improve my craft. I was writing inane posts that I knew nobody would ever read. But, unknowingly, I was developing a love for the craft of writing. More than love, I was unknowingly practicing the craft. I was actually like that bunch of infinite monkeys. Someone talked about the 10000 hour rule. With 1200 posts, I have definitely put about 2400 hours already. And then one thing led to another and I somehow knew that I've always wanted to write a full-length piece of fiction. Many years, posts and plots later, it took shape of The Nidhi Kapoor Story (website, FB page).

The book is still in the pre-publishing stage and I don't know how would it do when it comes it. However, I loved writing it. Now that I am done with it, the plot for the next full-length is already brewing in my head. Let's see how this experimenting with writing eventually goes.

Coming back to the blog, may be, just may be, I did not really make a dent while working on this blog But the blog did make a dent in my personality.

In fact, blogging gave me the biggest gift that I've ever got. The gift of writing. I have no clue what would I do if I could not write and express myself. There are times when words fail me but more often than not, writing has come to my rescue when I was trapped. I wish I could write better. And I know that more I write, better I'd get. And I am on it. Someday you'd see a bestseller with my name on it. I promise.

Call me indulgent, call me vainglorious, call me narcissist, I may be all of these things. I dont care. But I know that I am really proud to have completed ten years of blogging. And I have loved every minute of these ten years.

Hope I can write for another ten before I get bored..

And here is the most most important thing that I must talk about. I'd saved it for the end.

Dear readers of this blog, thank you. Apart from Naman, PD and Vivek, I dont know if anyone reads this regularly but whoever you are, thank you for reading. Even if you read one post, thank you. Thank you for those comments. If I have not replied, I take the blame. Thank you for landing on this page from I don't know where all. Trust me when I write, I dont want to attract traffic.

Thank you everyone for lurking in the shadows. For it was your apparent, yet invisible, presence that helped me continue writing on this blog for all these years.

Thank You!

And here's a toast for the next ten years...!

What to order at Starbucks?

The thing is that I love sitting at Starbucks and working on my book.

Even though I am alone when I am there, in my head, I am on a date with Nidhi Kapoor. Or may be with Renu on some days. There are days when I there with Tarana. Like today, I was with Renu and I had a wonderful time.

Coming back, irrespective, there is someone or the other to talk to when I am at Starbucks. I mean someone from my book. A character or two that I have cooked up. And when I am with someone, I love having conversations with them. In fact, conversations with these imaginary characters have helped me write.

Rather than thinking about the next line, I ask Nidhi about it. Or Tarana. Like today I asked Renu about her past and what made her the way she is. She had a lot to say. So much that I had to type fast. Really fast. So these answers from imaginary friends help me write. A friend told me that I am not an inherently creative individual. She may be right but then I think that this superpower that I have to converse with these imaginary characters help me craft what I am working on.

To be honest, the entire Nidhi Kapoor story is a result of these conversations.

The book is coming to an end. About three more days before I finish the first draft. I am hating that the book is coming to an end. I dont know how to keep it alive. Soon, I'd be the saddest and loneliest man that I know of. Why? Because all this while I had company of these three amazing women and in some days, I would be alone.

Guess such is life. But then, there is something that I am looking forward to. The next plot. I am hoping to write this one with a friend. We are still discussing it but if it goes as per plans, it would require me to sit at Starbucks even longer. But, but the challenge is, I do not like coffee. Or the iced-tea. Or anything that has any milk in it. Except ice-cream. I also don't want to eat any snacky things that they offer at Starbucks; after all I am on a weight inch loss spree and I want to avoid anything that is fattening.

And I don't want to sit at Starbucks and not buy anything. You see, reciprocity is a brilliant mental model and of all the people I know, I am the most severe case. If I am going to spend three hours everyday at Starbucks, I ought to buy something from them. No?

What do I do? What do I order? Someone help!

Originally posted here.

Chicken? Or Egg?

Hotlinked from here.

So I have a question. What came first? Chicken? Or the egg?

I am not sure. And I cant seem to find out.

Let me talk about a personal story pain-point about this.

If you know me, you would know that I have been trying to start writing. For money. Like a full time writer. I even made a blog but I did not do anything about it. Its on dotWriter. Do see it. And let me know what you think of it.

I know I have limited writing skills but I want to give it a shot. I know its too late at my age to attempt this. But I want to give it a shot. I know English does not come to me naturally. But I want to give it a shot. I know I dont know how to price my time. But I want to give it a shot.

You would also know that business development, or the act of asking for work, does not come naturally to me. I am a very shy person by nature and it takes a lot on me to be able to make a call and ask for work. Despite all of that, I make an effort to do it. I reach out, talk to people, pitch my services.

But somehow, every person that I talk to about this seems to want to work with experienced writers only. Only. Let me call this Chicken.

I tried to kill this monster called experienced and since I did not know who / what it is, I googled for it.

It told me that "experienced" is defined as "having knowledge or skill in a particular field, esp. a profession or job, gained over a period of time." The keyword here is "over a period of time". OVER A PERIOD OF TIME. Let me call this Egg.

So the question that I asked in the beginning, now that you know what is chicken and what is egg, let me ask it again. What came first? Chicken? or the Egg?

How do I get experience so that people who want to work with experienced writers agree to work with me? How do I get people to agree to work with me so that I may be experienced?

Simply put, where do I start? How do I get work? Any answers? Any help? Chicken? Egg?

In praise of walking

Add caption

One of the things that I am hoping to do in 2014, is to lose weight. Side-note: This has been on my yearly to-do lists since I started making these lists.

Since I have a medical condition that prevents me from running and gymming, I have handful of things that I can do to lose weight.

One of these things is walking. I have thus taken it upon me to ensure that I walk 10000 steps. Every day. Why 10000 steps?

Because...

A, its measurable.
B, it seems large enough goal.
C, its easy to keep track.
D, its simple to do.

In fact here is a chart that Moves has generated for me (if you want to track your steps, Moves is a simple, beautiful and intuitive application). For the sake of keeping scores, I walked 47K steps in the last week. And I walked 48K this week. Coming week I want to do 50K.

Except wednesday and sunday, I try and walk 10000 steps a day. Some days I do more. Somedays I do less. But the point is that I am more aware that each day I am supposed to walk. And each day I walk with a goal in my head. I have started doing things differently, like I walk shorter distances. As a run of thumb, any distance that is less than 2 KMs, I walk it up. Takes about 20 minutes for a fat-ass like me. I ensure that I leave in time to be able to walk for 20 minutes. Although when I reach, I am panting, I am gasping for breath but I know that I have burned some calories. And I know that I saved 20 bucks (10 bucks per KM in Mumbai). Two little drops in two different oceans that are important to me.

So today, while I walking something dawned on me. That when we take transport, we miss the scenery. And the stories that the scenery tells us. Its same as taking the train versus taking a flight. Imagine you flying over the countryside in a comfortable tube. You see things from 30000 feet and you marvel at the sights below when you could be part of the sight. There is so much to see, so much to experience on the ground below. A comfortable seat in the clouds can not match the experience of being a part of the sight. Ever. Trust me. Been there, done that.

And why do I like flying and airports so much? Because I am perpetually short of time. And I rather save time than save money. And flying is the fastest mode of travel for distances more than 1000 KMs. atleast in India. Even if its a scheduled flight.

So let me come to walking. This is supposed to be a post in praise of walking. So today, I had lunch and then I walked home. Its around 3 KMs walk and I took about 40 minutes for it. En route a couple of things happened that made me happy about my decision to walk home after lunch.

Let me talk about those two things.

First. These few kids were playing football close to where I was walking. Somehow the ball landed close to me. A kid yelled at me and said, "Uncle please pass the ball."

He called me uncle. Uncle. I was so furious so furious that it's not funny. I know I am old and I am fat and I am bald but I am not getting called uncle by these kids. Before I could yell back at him and invite him for showdown, since I was walking, my thinking muscles were active. I realized that it was not a personal remark and he was just going by my looks. He did not know me and he had no way to know that I hate being called an uncle.

The episode taught me a very important lesson. That I need to think through things and evaluate them objectively. I could've got angry at him. I almost flipped the bird but I did not.

Second. Along the way a rickshaw stopped me and asked for directions. I take pride in my ability to remember directions and I told him. An instant later, another pedestrian asked me for directions. This guy was from one of the seven Eastern states, I don't know which one though. He looked as if he had walked quite a distance and still had some distance to go. He didn't seem to have money for a rick and I did not know the bus routes. So, dejected, I told him that its a 30 minute walk and I dont know the bus. The dude grinned and walked away.

After I told him the directions, as well as I could, I realized that he comes from one of the most beautiful and gifted locations and yet he is here, in polluted and over-crowded Mumbai. I am assuming he's come here chasing the same thing that I've been chasing - my dreams. I thought if I was in his place and I lived amidst those mountains and valleys and rivers and springs and flowers and trees and beauty and whether, I would never leave that place. I would have normally cursed him and give him unsolicited advice of going back.

But then, since I was in the thinking mode, I thought, what if he's thinking the same thing about me That I have left family and friends and comfort and protection and all those things behind. To chase a dream that I am not even sure of.

Thats it. Two stories. Each happened in quick succession. I am sure if I walked everyday with an intent to look for scenery and stories, I can find many more. For a storyteller that I want to become, these stories are going to be important. I definitely saw much more, observed more and grasped more. And not just storytelling, for the lazy account planner in me, people-watching is an important tool. Walking gives me yet another opportunity to observe people in their natural environments.

So the point of these stories is that if you walk, you get better at being a human. Rickshaws speeds you up and fly past the scenery. Ofcourse rickshaws don't make you bad but they don't make you good either. You get the point?

No? May be go for a walk after you've read this.

Anyway, to end this note, the lesson of the day is that there are so many merits of walking and its sad that I've ignored all these all these years. No more. From now on, I am going to walk. At least 10000 steps a day.

For the ones who like to skim rather than read, here is a quick list in praise of walking.

When you walk...

1. You lose weight without realizing that you are losing weight. All you do is walk and you dont goto the gym or go on a diet. You just walk and you realize that inches are reducing from your waistline. 
2. You give your muscles exercise. Muscles work on the principle of positive feedback loop. Or Anti-fragility if you will. Every step you take, makes your muscles stronger. 
3. You can tweak walking to make it a tool to spend more time with your special someone. Walking gives you "together" time. Nothing like walk. For a self-proclaimed King of Mush like me, I think, walking in the rain is THE most romantic thing you could do.
4. You see things. Read the two anecdotes above. 
5. You get perspective. Again, read the two anecdotes above.

This is it!

What next? Go walk! 10000 steps a day! Preferably with your special someone :)