Day 32 of the lockdown

Day 32 of the lockdown.
Day 38 otherwise.

It is after a few days that I feel human myself again.

And what is this myself? Well, someone who's up and about early (as I write this, its 8 AM. Been up since 7 and puttering around the house, and right now I am sipping on to my coffee (with coconut oil and turmeric)). I feel that there is a lot to be done and no not in an overwhelming manner - in a good way. I am generally hopeful about life and work and all that. I know times are hard and things are tough and it will not be easy - especially for mercenaries like me. But I am hopeful. As hopeful as I have ever been in my life. Like acche din are just around the corner, even though its been almost 40 years now.

Thing is, I don't know what's helped me get up on the right side of the bed. This is one of those "khush hoon main aaj khamkha" days. You know when you are singing for no reason. Remember that ad from Cadburys? And while we are at it, see this post from Mar 2015. 

I am still sleeping as much. Or as less. Depends on how you look at it. I am still staying up late. I am still anxious. I am still having all the coffee that I must not have. I am not getting enough physical exercise. I am clearly not getting enough Vitamin D. Bank balance is now as negative as the amount of hair I have on my head. But I am generally being myself today.

I am sure there are things that are working below the surface - I don't know what those are and I want to identify those. Just that I have not done anything different yesterday compared to other days. Maybe I slept really well? Yesterday, there was this breeze that cooled the room a bit (my AC has conked off and I can't get it fixed till we open the lockdown). May be I will get used to a life where I don't need to AC to sleep? Fuck that would be amazing. It's always been a big big goal in my life! Let's see.

Apart from a tad better sleep, I am not sure what has changed. And anyway I sleep well on most days. There has to be something else at play. Need to figure out what that is. Maybe it will come to me?

That's about it I guess. 

Chalo kaam kare! Have loads to do :)

Previous posts in the lockdown series are - Day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 10, 11, 19, 30

Day 30 of the Lockdown

Day 30 of the lockdown.

Or this may be 31ist for all you care. Let's carry on with whatever number. Day 36 otherwise.

Hello, blog, or whoever is reading this.

As I start writing this, it is 4:42 AM and I have just done the dishes. What an ungodly hour to do dishes. But I don't know what else to do at this time. I am tired - physically, mentally, and emotionally. For some reason, I can't get sleep (one reason is that the AC has conked off and the people I've taken it on rent from can't fix, cos lockdown). Of course, I am trying hard to eat less and in moderation. But I am failing gloriously at that. I mean in the last 24 hours, I have had three full meals, each at least 1500 calories. How do I know? Well, after each meal, all I can do is doze off in whatever state I am at in (sitting, lying down, doing dishes, etc).

Anyhow. Now that I am on the computer. Lemme dump the thoughts in my head here. 

So, the thing is, when this lockdown was announced, I had decided that I will use this break to work on the next book, get fitter and I don't know what all. I even wrote about it in my blog here. It was supposed to be three weeks and I was supposed to follow a schedule like a mule. Which I did. For a couple of days, I think. And then it was back to how I was before the lockdown. In a Brownian Motion. Drifting. Where life takes me. 

I think that's how I am probably. Start with something that has a super large ask from me. Find a comfortable part, that is higher than the normal and almost always lower than the ask that I have identified for myself. But in effect, I end up doing more than what I would if I were a realist. 

And this break was supposed to separate boys from men. And I think I am clearly in the boys' category. Do I even need to put all those lofty goals for myself then? Something to think about!

Of course, a few good things have happened. 

Here's a list.

A. Got the iPhone fixed. 

Got some number from the internet. Called the guy and even though he took almost double what it would've cost me on a regular day, the phone now works. And that means I can be a tad more functional.

But then, to be honest, I broke the phone on the 2nd day of the lockdown and I wasn't really functional, or on the other end, hyper-productive when I did not have a good phone. 

It's just a peace-of-mind thing that everything I want and need and wish for from a tech device is now back in my hands. You know, things like transferring money to others on Paytm? I'd have to call friends for that cos Paytm does not work from a desktop!
B. Met a couple of friends. 

They drove from Ghatkopar to here. Thing is, I was out of cash and there was no ATM in sight and I did not know how to operate. So, I asked them if they could. And voila. 

More than the cash, I think I am happy that I saw them.

Actually, no! I am not happy. Rather, I am pissed and angry that I saw them. Thing is, I wanted this lockdown to be pure. You know, sacrosanct. Where I don't meet anyone and no one meets me. Except for the delivery guys and the building security. 

Plus I realized that I hate when my friends and family see the way I live. I have no guilt or shame about how I've designed by my life and how I live. I definitely do not give two hoots about whoever comes to my place. But then, there are friends that you want to show off to, when those people see you living in a shack, it breaks my heart. I guess I'll never be comfortable going to (or calling people) houses, homes, pads, etc of other people. I know I am weird. 

C. Since I have been working for almost a month now, at home, on a chair and table. I don't think I am ever going back to a coworking space. Unless, of course, I get it for free. Or if someone else is paying for it. 

Oh, I will have to get some office supplies (printer, paper, aircon that works, and other such things that makes it bearable to sit at a place for hours and dream). 

I'd save some money. Money that would become super paramount in the times to come. 

D. I finally put up this wall of post-its and paper where I would purportedly write shit about my next book. Purportedly. I am not sure. Let's see. Also, see the point above about using the lockdown to do things. 

E. The best part is that because of COVID, I think the events business will take a large hit. I wrote about it here. And as a result my pivot to the next thing that I work on, to make ends meet, will get accelerated. 

No, I don't have an idea what that next thing is. And I am chatting with people to understand what it could be. Let's see what I close on. If you've read till here, you must know me well and have an interest in my success. Tell me what's the next thing I could do? 

With that, over and out! Hope you are staying safe and sane! 

Previous posts in the lockdown series are - Day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 10, 11, 19

Day 19 of 21daysOfLockdown

Day 19 of the lockdown.

Day 25 otherwise.

Been more than a week since I wrote. Even though I've had a lot to write about. And I did not have anything to write. Minutes have blurred into hours, hours into days and days into something that I can't recall either the beginning of. Or the end of. Guess that's how life essentially is. Time blurring into one continuous stream that we sort of stop noticing!

Anyhow. So when we got into the lockdown, I decided that I would come out of this healthier, happier and with a manuscript of my book. Ok, hyperbole. But I had decided that I would use the time to see if I am a boy or a man. And if the last 18 days are to be believed, am more of a boy than a man. And that's a truth I need to live with, for the rest of my life. Unless I use the remainder of the time (another 18 days from here on) to get things done. In fact, I promised myself that in case lockdown extends in Mumbai, I would stop everything and focus on my book and shave my head off. So maybe, the book is what I'd work on for the next few days. 

Oh, I did shave my head today. A part of it at least. Whatever I could in sweltering heat of a stuffy, tiny room in my house. And if you are curious, I did a terrible job at it. To a point that I don't think I'll be able to show my face to anyone for a while. Thank God for the lockdown. I just need to say that I broke the camera of the computer to avoid the video calls!

So this is it. Nothing great or interesting to share. Just that I hadn't written in a while and I had to.

What are you guys up to? Pray, do tell!

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7*, 8*, 9*, 10, 11, 12*, 13*, 14*, 15*, 16*, 17*, 18* 
*- the days I did not post

Hello April / Monthly Review - Feb and Mar 2020

Hi!

This is my bi-monthly (used to be once a month, but from now on, once in two months) report on what I am up to.

Before anything else, I must say, the past few days will have to be among the MOST incredible days that I have ever seen. The entire world has come to a literal stop and everyone is suffering. You know, makes me feel lucky that I have had any major incidents, accidents or anything negative like that. The closest that I came to harm is 26/11 when I was still far away in Vashi playing pool with a few friends and terrorists were pummeling parts of South Mumbai. And when I compare myself to others that have been caught in Mumbai floods, communal riots (in Mumbai in the past and now more recently in Delhi), wild accidents and all that, I think I am really really lucky! Though this one may bring me to my knees. Let's see. 

This year has been wretched, to say the least. I think this tweet from a GMMR fan account will sum this up...

2020 was directed by me.

— George RR Martin (@GRRM) March 18, 2020

I just hope you and your loved ones are safe, cared for and in comfort. If you can read this, you are among the privileged few that have access to a house, an internet connection and most importantly, the ability to read and comprehend what I am writing.

So, coming to the review for Feb and Mar and the plan for Apr and May (lol :)). To jog your memory, when I do a review, I track progress compared to my yearly goals, life plan and goals. And for the record, three large goals for 2020 are Book 2, a sub-5-hours marathon, a topline of 50 crores. 

Here's the recap for Feb and Mar 2020.
I have sections for fails, wins, inbetweens, lessons, plan for Feb 2020 and a question.

#fails 

1. Did a lot of things that did help me make some connections. But none of them were going to contribute to the large goals I have. So the lessons is, I need to pick my battles well!
2. Did nothing on the sub-5 marathon goal. I did go for long walks but that's that. With every passing month, I am realizing that I may have to drop the health goals altogether! 
3. I was to write 25K words on #book2, had to train to be able to climb 100 flights and had to fix the C4E website. Did none of those :(

#wins

1. Attended a concert by AR Rahman. While it does not serve any professional goals per se, on a personal level, it is a dream come true to have seen him live. Plus now that I have seen the setup of his concert, it is on my wishlist to do something like that. Assuming I remain in the events business after this COVID-19. 
2. Along with AD, I published an article on one of the most respected business magazines (it was on my todo list since 2018). Read it at podm.in/ivm.
3. Again, along with AD, I am making progress on my first podcast. And the article I talk about above, gave me the thrust required to get the podcast ready. We call it The Founder Thesis and the first few episodes are ready! If not for COVID-19, we would've released those by mid-April. In case you wish to listen to those, please lemme know and I will share. 
4. My #aPicADay has reached 95+ days! Longest I have kept up with something! 

#inBetweens (these are neither wins / nor losses)

1. I had a little more time this time than other times. And thus I attended a few open mics, at-home concerts, live shows and so on and so forth. I was enamored by the struggle that these performing artists put in. I wish I could do something about those. Any ideas?
2. saurabhgarg.com has finally taken shape. Phew! I pestered a friend into teaching me the basics of Elementor and I hacked together a page. A page. Not a website. But after trying with multiple tech-teams and failing at it, I can finally send people to a website! 

#miscNotes / What did I learn this month?
I will also include things that the lockdown has taught me (though I would write a longer post would happen at some point in time).

1. The most important thing has to be the lessons in deliberate practice. Lemme call it Riyaz. I wrote about it in detail here.
2. Since we've gone in lockdown, I have started a few online courses (the ones that I never had the time for). This one, about learning how to learn stands out. Please consider doing it if you have the time. 
3. I learned that while I am ok to cook and clean and all that, it ends up wasting a LOT of time. Like 5 hours a day. And then it drains you out of the energy - physical, mental and emotional. I did these for a few days and then found a restaurant that at a steep price is willing to deliver meals to me. So that's cool. 
4. I actually like this lockdown. I haven't been able to step out since this happened but because I am on my own, I am pretty much a master of my time. I would love to maintain this life where I control my time. 

#inApr20
What do I plan to do in April?
I am not sure if we would get out of the lockdown and a lot depends on that.

My key work area is events and if lockdown extends another month, the events business is almost as good as gone. And that means I would be jobless and will have to think of an alternate career. And at a time when everything around me would be bad - slow economy, joblessness, too many talented people around that are vying for the same jobs. So, I am not sure how things would play. What do you think? 

But what I can do is, control things that I can control. Things like #book2! And the 25K words that I have planned since I was like a kid in diapers! Yeah, on it. 

***

So, that's about it for the update. As always, thank you for your time and attention.

Over and out! 

@saurabh

09 04 2020

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PREVIOUS UPDATES are here...

2019 - Aug, Sep, Oct, Nov, Dec
2020 - Annual Goals, Jan, Feb-Mar (this post)

Thank you for your patience. It is not an easy task to survive these long emails! 
Lemme end this with the best photo that I clicked in the last two months

View this post on Instagram

Day 77/365. This too shall pass. Featuring a peg board from @nappadori, a book shelf and some of my most prized possessions - books. #bookstagram #books #booklover #bookshelf #thistooshallpass #anichya #vipassana #note2self #pegboard

A post shared by SG (@altsaurabh) on Mar 17, 2020 at 9:10am PDT

10 things I'd do differently if I could be a teenager again

One of my mentors asked me to do this today.

List down 10 things u would do differently for yourself, if you could start again from being a teenager.

So, here's my answer.
And in order of what I would take if I could.

1. I would invest. Whatever little amount I could. When I was a teenager, I would have got pennies for pocket money but I would invest. By now, in 20 years, thanks to compounding, it would be a substantial sum. Maybe enough to allow me to not work on the day of writing this. 
2. Start a business asap. I did do those comic stalls and renting my video games and all that but I would do more. The kinds that start giving me some capital so I could invest it and build a compounding machine. 
3. I would spend more time with my parents and family - after all in the future, time would get scarce, how so ever hard I may try.
4. I would make better friends. The ones that I can count on when I need them. And the ones that I could learn from (and not just the ones that lived in the proximity). Most people I call friends are merely there because it was convenient for them and for me. And in the long run, in the time of adversity, convenience runs out. 
5. Related, I would go to a better college and get a better education. I did go to fairly good colleges but I think I got lucky. Thing is, I was so so so unaware about life and career when I was a teenager that I just went with the flow and drifted wherever life took me. And the pattern has stayed with me! I would take the conscious call to go to the best educational institution that I could.
6. I would learn how to code. I was good exceptional at it in college but I lost the plot once I started with my MBA. I would do this to be able to be more independent of others. Of course, back then I would not have known that code will rule the world!
7. I would travel more. The thing is, I am lucky to have travel far and wide and now that I have been literally home for the last year or so, I want to go out more. And if I look at a longer-term, whatever little I know, I learned because I could travel so much! So, travel more.
8. I would learn a musical instrument. No reason. 
9. I would take care of my fitness. I am reasonably ok for my age (probably not?) but I would want to be fitter so that I can do more. Plus I enjoyed sports as a kid. That went for a toss when I went for my MBA and then subsequent work life.
10. I'll get more active in the community. In the sense that I would want to be more active in the world that has given me everything that I have. If not for the community, then what? 

That's about it. 

You? 

Day 11 of 21daysOfLockdown

Day 11 of the lockdown.

Day 16 otherwise.

So today, I finally decided to stop cooking at home. Even though it is super risky to order in, I still want to go ahead and do it. My theory is that these restaurants have been operational for a while now and that means they are taking care of the safety requirements in terms of food and all. Plus the amount of time and mental trauma it takes to cook, clean, cook, clean twice a day is not something that I can't handle. I have learned enough to be able to do it if there is an absolute need. But for the time being, I am happy to order. The only trouble is that most restaurants that you can order from are cutting corners (at least the ones I have been ordering from) and sending in smaller portions. And I think it's ok. I want to judge but lemme take a step towards stoicism. 

The food situation is thus sorted. I need to reduce the amounts I eat so that I can actually lose some weight without working out - who doesn't want that? Apart from that, I also want to (and will work on) my sleep. For starters, I plan to sleep at 930 PM till the time lockdown is lifted. I mean if I cant do this at this time, when would I do? In terms of headspace, thanks to Naval's 60-day meditation challenge, I have been thinking hard about things. Harder than I've ever thought. And on things that are important. And has made me realize things that I never knew about myself. For example, today I realized that I am no longer a details person. I like to think and execute the macro and want someone else to do the dirty work. Of course, no ships were built by people that did not do the dirty work themselves but if that's a tradeoff I have to make, I will! At the age I am at, while I do want to learn new things and upskill myself, I do not want to undo what I have.

If I do these three (not waste time on chores, sleep well and think deeper), I think I should be ok. I will have enough time to be able to do things that I have planned to do in this break. This IS a break! I mean most of us are getting paid while we are at home. If you can read this, you for sure are. It may be less, it may have reduced a bit, it may be under a threat but as of today, you are getting paid. And all that you have is today! Not yesterday, not tomorrow. Yes, learn from the past and plan for the future. But live in today. 

Anyhow. So that's that. Today was day 11. We are at more than the halfway mark. If we survived for this long, we can do whatever is left. As always, please take care, be good! 

See you guys soon! 

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7*, 8*, 9*, 10

* - the days I did not post

Day 10 of 21daysOfLockdown

Day 10 of the lockdown.Day 15.

15 days now since I have been indoors. Except for the two grocery runs I made. And except the occasional walk that I go for around my building. One time I ever walked up 12 stories - you know, was trying to get fitter. But then that shall remain a distant dream.

So, the 10th day. I think I am beginning to accept that lockdown is not a bad idea, after all. I mean I am fairly sorted in the head even though I am alone. I am enjoying this solitude. I do miss company once in a while but those times I am ok with video calls. Etc etc. 

But then, like everything good, there are a few bads that I am worried about. Lemme make a list of things that are concerning me.

Today, I ran out of groceries. But then I found a restaurant that is willing to deliver at this time. So that is sorted. 

My internet connection is getting slower by the day. Apparently, everyone is streaming shit on Netflix and Youporn and all that. I know tons of friends that bough subscription to multiple streaming services - I mean how many times can you watch the same shows over and over again? In fact, the other day I read a tweet where a gentleman predicted that in about 12-18 months, there would be a glut of content on Netflix cos nothing new is getting made. Coming back to the Internet, this is something that I can clearly not do anything about. So, fuck this! 

Work is surprisingly going good. I mean I don't really have a lot to work on - thanks to a general lull in the business environment. But whatever little I have, I am getting a lot more done. At this stage, I can only hope that things will improve. And I hope things improve fast - before I am out of money (which I already am - just that I wish I don't run out of my credit line).

Fitness is not being up to the mark. But then there is no place to showcase the fitness. Except for all the jhaadu and dishes that I do. And then I don't really have anyone to show the great job that I am doing with jhaadu. 

In terms of life philosophy and other such things, I think I need a fresh start. You know, reset life. Start afresh. Like in the Fast Car. 

Anyhow. Glad to have finally written something after 3 days. Need to get other things back on track after I took that ill-timed sabbatical a few days ago. 

Over and out!

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7*, 8*, 9*

* - the days I did not post

Day 6 of 21daysOfLockdown

Day 6.
Day 11.

Today was day 6. And like most things human, life seems to have come to that point where I have accepted this as a new reality. It took me all of 11 days. To start getting comfortable with the idea of being alone, enjoying my own company and accepting that I will have to do the dishes, come what may. And while I was not sure about the idea, in the beginning, I am starting to see the benefit (the kitchen would not stink when I go to get myself that glass of water. 

Apart from that, today as well, like the last 2, 3 days, I could start work only after it was 1 PM. And then before I could list out the things that I was supposed to work on, it was lunchtime. And before I knew it, it was time for the siesta. And before I knew it, I had seen 5 episodes of Blacklist. And before I knew it, it was the time to go to bed! Where I am, writing this. 

If I were to talk about good things, I did the second day of Naval's 60 minutes a day for 60 days meditation challenge. It was tough today. Hopefully, it will get easier with time. Oh, I also started OMAD today (I ate some 1500 calories today, in one go) and I hope to continue to do so tomorrow. I did resist the temptation to have coke multiple times during the day. And I did not have coffee or peanut butter. Guess who's being a good boy! 

Of course, I did not work. Not on the website, not on the guitar, not on reading, not on my second book. And this has to change. Will try to do it from tomorrow. 

Wish me luck! 

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Day 5 of 21daysOfLockdown

Day 5.

Day 10. 

Not the best of the days, even though I started it off brilliantly. And I did catch up with a few friends from the past that clearly I've grown over, now that I met them on a video call, forced by the Covid-19 crisis.

All was ok, in fact, I took a break yesterday only when I did nothing but watch TV and fed myself crap - figuratively and in reality. Today was supposed to be the day I got back to work. And I did. To be honest. Right in the morning. I started with work and I don't know where I lost it.

As I write this, I am plonked in front of the TV, binging on some stupid content that I would not remember tomorrow and I don't know how to not do it. At this hour I was supposed to be out walking, or climbing the steps or something.

I think the inability to meet people at a Starbucks is eating away at my heart and head and all that.

I guess once I sleep it off, I will be ok.

This is it for the day. While you're here, see this 10-minute video.


See you tomorrow!

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2, 3, 4

Day 4 of 21daysOfLockdown

Day 4. Day 9. Whatever. Point is, I am indoors for a few days now (except grocery runs) and today I just did not want to do anything at all. I mean no work, no tracking, no timesheets, no Asana, no worry of the new normal in a post-Covid world, no stress about what I am eating and definitely no thinking about how I could be doing more in this time that all of us have at hands. 

So I did not. 

It's 7:59 PM in the evening as I write this trust me I have not done a single thing that I would do on a normal day. For starters, I haven't showered. I haven't cooked today (phew! what a relief). I had two Diet Cokes (and the supply is getting exhausted now). And I have parked myself in front of the TV and been on a marathon. I've seen two already, on to the third one as we speak. 

The only thing I'll do is upload a pic on Insta. I don't want to break that streak. 

Oh, and this post. Of course. 

So here's a thread that I wrote on twitter the other day when I was on my way back from Delhi. This was just 2 days before the Junta Curfew drama happened and about a week before the Lemme reproduce it here (and edit a bit to give it more context).

[START]On my way to Mumbai, settled on 11A. A zillion thoughts are clouding my head. Merit a blogpost but because there’s nothing else to do as I wait for the takeoff, here’s a thread. Primarily, me talking to myself. You know, like writing to the dear diary?

1. First things first. What is home? I was born in Haryana. Grew up in Delhi. I lived across India for a few months in tiny spurts. Now settled in Mumbai. Since 2014. Always maintained that Mumbai is home. But Delhi is where I belong. 

Or vice versa. Maybe. 

You know, confused millennial.
To add context, parents are back in Delhi. Significant relations (friends, co-conspirators, business partners, colleagues, loose connections, flings, etc) are mostly in Mumbai. Relatives are spread across the world. Not too attached to them.

Work is primarily Mumbai. All passion projects (except writing that can happen from anywhere) are Mumbai. 

Most importantly, I find Mumbai conducive to my lifestyle - professionals, creative kinds, hustlers, convenient, etc.

So, Mumbai looks like home. No? Maybe. Maybe not. 

You see, confused millennial.
2. Why am I going back to Mumbai? 

Isn’t Mumbai my home? But then home is where your people are. Or where the work is.

Most of the people that I want to see often (even though they are a mere handful) are indeed in Mumbai but are self-isolating. So physical proximity doesn’t really help. Plus I am not the video calls kinds. I love my handshakes and hugs and pats on the backs.

Work has come to a grinding halt. You see events and films. Marketing consulting is getting fucked as well. Slowly. Thing is, what I do is a discretionary expense at best. After all, everyone “knows” marketing. Yes, I do add value and yes it’s important. But a lot of it requires F2F interactions to deliver. But in times of Covid-19, these would get few and far between. As they say, winter is coming.

So there’s no real reason to go to Mumbai. Or stay back in Delhi for that matter. Thing is, life as we know it, will change. This IS the black swan event that @nntaleb has talked about often.

3. What about my people? 

I don’t know. While am a very benevolent, empathetic person, I have less than 5 people that I really really care for. The kinds I'd considered dying for. These 4-5 will be ok. And they anyway don’t rely on me for anything apart from emotional support that I am not too good at giving.

The larger community, world that I want to change, make better, I don’t know what would happen to them! And come to think of it, they don’t really know me. And I don’t do zilch for them right now. I just have a vague idea that I want to make this world a better place. Too much wishful thinking. 

You see, ambitious millennial. 

What about work? 

Well, post-Covid, people like me that rely on conversations and meetings to earn our bread would be forced to re-look at how we work. This is already happening in less than 10 days since I wrote this. 

My strength is opening doors with strangers and connecting them with others (people, ideas, etc) that add value to everyone. You know, scout. Or a connector, if you will. In the post-Covid world, this skill will move online. 

And I suck at that! 

My work will change. 

The way I work will change. As a result, my lifestyle will change. In fact, am already thinking about the next steps with life. I haven't trusted a lot on savings and it’s a hard and long few months ahead of me.

Of course, things may come under control soon and all this may turn out to be the musings of a restless mind that is bordering on paranoia. But this incident has made me look at the very assumptions that I’ve made to build my life. Need to think about things that will make life comfortable and better in times to come.

[END]

I hope that made sense. How are you coping up with the lockdown? What's your defense mechanism? 

And with that, that's it for today! See you tomorrow :) 

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2, 3

Day 3 of 21daysOfLockdown

Today, after ages, the things I've been cooking for myself started to taste like food. And more importantly, look like food. You know, to me, the taste is a state of mind. I can happily eat the blandest and the spiciest foods ever. I think I became like that when I went to MDI for college. The food at the mess was great for a couple of times and after that, the taste buds just died. Like died. To a point that even a trip back home will not when my mom would make some amazing food would not give me any joy. 

But that's that. The thing is, I never imagined that a time would come when I would have to cook and clean for myself. To me, the availability of a domestic help was as much a guarantee as access to air and water is. Was. Of course, it is not true anymore. As we have seen. 

The thing is, I don't mind these chores at all. I am ok to work in the kitchen and all that. The challenge is that I want to use this downtime for others to create something lasting and sustainable for myself. And I want to believe that if not for all the chores, I would've! 

In fact, my life has been thrown upside down. I suddenly have a lot less time on my hands. And while I do practice the guitar and tinker around with Wordpress, I am simply unable to do anything else. And there are just far too many chores. I hope I lived with full-time help or something that would take care of things. I now know how all the rich ones can do so much when all the poor ones can not! 

Anyhow. Enough of rant. I shall do what I have to. 

So, I started SoG today. Been meaning to start for a while. Let's see how long this iteration lasts. Taking lessons and cue from last time around, I am not putting any pressure on myself about content, frequency and all that. I will send as and when I feel like sharing something. I just to make my mind about what goes on this blog, what goes on SoG and what goes on LinkedIn. And to be honest, I am glad that I have an audience - even if its small and a smaller number reads what I send.

Apart from that, I did talk to Suresh for a bit about #book2 and I don't think it is going well. The poor guy puts in a lot of effort and I am disappointing him with all my inaction :( 

Thing is, in terms of how the day went, not really happy. I cant be. It was almost 12 before I could start anything productive. And it's scary and sad at the same time. If at this time when everyone has all the free time on their hands, I can't find the time to do things that I've always wanted to, when would I? I think I need to be more disciplined. 

While it's day 3, for me, technically, its the 8th day. By now I should've been accustomed to the din of life where I live by myself. But of course, I am not ok. I can't wait to get back to normal life where I would not waste time on chores. And will have more time to work on things that I like. Or will I? Time shall tell! 

Previous posts in the series - 1, 2

Day 2 of 21daysOfLockdown

Today is Day 2 of the lockdown. And like yesterday, I cooked for myself (once, made a large pot, to be eaten multiple times during the day), did the bartans, did some safai and then after all that tried to get some work done. And no, I did not get a lot of work done. This is probably the first time I am doing all these chores by myself and no, these are not fun. These are not for me. Of course all the respect to people that manage all these AND other things alongside. I cant. Not even to save my life.

Here's a salute to the ones that do!

Moving on.

So because there is nothing important happening, I have a lot of time to think about things. And the mindless chores are making me get into that diffused thinking state where you let your mind wander about. And I have realized that this is the kind of idyllic life that I've always wanted.

In that ideal life, I would wake up without an alarm, in an empty bedroom. I would not have pressing engagements that expect me to reach a certain destination. I would start my day with some thinking, some warm water, some stretches, you know, coming to life. And then get to work. And then spend the day learning (today I did some), creating (today I did some) and connecting with people I care for (today I did some) towards the evening. And then wind down and sleep for like 8 hours or so. Of course all the bills, chores would be taken care of.

And this lockdown is making me do EXACTLY that. Just that the dream of becoming a rich and powerful man will have to be kept aside. Or may be when I am bored with the idleness, I could whip out my Ferrari and drive to the nearest city, pull off a caper, holiday at an exotic destination and then come back to the easy life. No?

But, SG, what about all those dreams and ambitions that you have?
Oh, those... do they really matter in the grand scheme of things? I mean look at us now. We are stuck in our homes with no hopes for the next 3 weeks!

But, SG, if you were indeed as rich as you want to be, you wouldn't be stuck here! No?
You are right. I wouldn't be. I would probably be at a secluded, landlocked island, chilling on the beach - eating, sleeping, creating and making merry.

There. I said it.

Sigh! 

So moving on. 2. 

The other thing that is remarkable and happened today is that I broke my phone. There is this large green patch on half the screen that won't go away. And I can't type on it. And I cant tap on it. Basically, it is useless. I will have to get a new one. Which I can only after the lockdown is lifted. Which is the cheapest iPhone right now, by the way? 

The bad part is that I will have to spend a mini-fortune. Unless I am ready to move to the Android universe (which I don't want to). The good part? I will probably spend far less time on the phone.

Moving on. 3
The best part of the day was when I saw this TED talk about how to learn in 20 hours. The speaker, Josh, postulates that you can be above average in any skill in just about 20 hours of deliberate, regular practice. Keywords - deliberate, regular. Inspired by him, I have picked up the guitar. Let's see where I reach. Today was day 1. So yeah, 20 days to go.

That's about it, I guess. Day 2 (which is technically day 7 for me) was a mixed bag but exactly the kinds that I want for myself - just need to find some banks to break-in to and super superstars to date and some countries to own :)

Stay safe, stay sane, stay healthy.

Previous posts in the series - 1,

Day 1 of 21daysOfLockdown

Hola!

We are in a lockdown for the next 21 days. And that means that I am away from all the people that I care for and talk to and want to talk to and like to talk to. And that means that I am by myself for the next few days. And that means that this is the closest I will ever come to being a Forrest - you know live by yourself? Of course, I have a comfortable house and a laptop and a refrigerator full of Diet Coke and an Internet connection that allows me to talk to people across the world and a smart TV that has Netflix on it and all that. But still, I will not have any human connection at all. For the next 21 days. I mean, except the occasional grocery runs that I would make. But then those humans are not humans you know. I mean they are not friends. I don't crave for their touch on my skin. I don't want to sing them a song. They don't see my shenanigans. They are the Amy, Lenord, Raj, Howard, Penny, Bernie and whoever to the Sheldon in me! You know what am saying?

Anyhow.

Now that I am in the lockdown, I have no clue what to do. I anyway had little to do when I was able to be out and about but this forced seclusion is not really cool. I crave independence and being the master of my ship and all that. I know that I need to stay away from the world. I know that we need to stay far from each other. But then I don't like the idea of getting forced to stay indoors. Of course, this is for the others that do not understand this but I don't like getting slotted like that, among others.

The thing is, there's no other option. I can either crib about it and write fanciful pieces of texts about it. Or I can use this time to do things that I've always wanted to. In fact, in VG, in one of the conversations, last night said,

"This lockdown will separate boys from men. People who dint do things on their list like working out, reading books, Learning a new thing due to lack of time..if they don’t it even know..they should stop bullshitting themselves" 

May be this is my opportunity to test if I really want that book that bad!

So, I will take his advice and see if I can do what I have always thought I'd do if I had the time. While it's a long list, the top of it would be #book2. Let's see if I can push it out of my system as we stare at at least 21 days of disruption.

Plus, apart from the book, there are quite a few things that I've wanted to do all my life. this is the perfect opportunity. What I need to learn is accessible on the internet and I have a lot of time and there's no one to disturb!

Plus I think I will try to adapt to the non-digital life. In the sense that I will try to move all my timekeeping, thought and all that to a notepad. I already have one where I've been logging in my thoughts since 20th March (the day I went into self-isolation. And no, grocery runs do not count). It is incredibly tough to not rely on the convenience that technology offers but I will try.

Let's see if I am a boy. Or a man.

With that, it's over and out. Oh, and one more thing. I will try to write every day for the next 21 days. Today was day 1. See you guys tomorrow.

Day 3, Self Quarantine

Today's day 3 of my self-isolation, imposed on by the government because there are people who do not know how to take precautions. Well, issues of living in a democracy, which otherwise is not a bad place to be at. I mean I'd rather be in a democracy than a dictatorship. At least I have some semblance of rights.

Yeah, rights.

The very rights that have made you jailed in your own house.

Anyhow. So, when I decided that I will lock myself in (ok, I did not decide - I did not have the free will - the government made me), I decided that I would try and write a book about my experiences with seclusion. But of course like all the other grandiose plans, this one had its share of challenges. And three days in it, I can see the writing on the wall - "the experiences of someone forced to stay indoors" is not happening. Not because I dont have the time for it - I have all the time in the world now. Just that I dont see a new insight or anything interesting to record. Even if I were to make this a memoir or something, right now, not sure who would be interested in reading that I now log-in every morsel of food I eat or the chunks of time I spend? Apart from today. Actually third day is the worst. The first day you are all gung-ho about shit you'd do to change your life and all that. By second day you are feeling great. But on the third day, you realised that all the effort you put in was futile. To a point that you give up. Today was the third day and thus everything that I did in the first two days went for a toss!

Well maybe I will start tomorrow all over again. You know, like a reset? Day 1. It's always Day 1.

Until tomorrow!

AR Rahman Live. Lessons from Shanta Gokhale. And Riyaz.

So, last weekend, I had an opportunity to see AR Rahman perform live. And thanks to a friend who was there to manage a part of the event, I had the best seat in the house. You know, the one at the console and next to the stage? That! And I have to say, it is worth all the hype. The guy is a genius, a magician and everything else that you have heard about him.

View this post on Instagram

There’s never too much red. Perks of having friends that know fancy people. And yet continue to be friends with you. Was fortunate to see ARR perform live. And it’s worth all the hype. Thanks @dipanker.sharma for making this happen. #sgClicks #shotOnIPhone #concertphotography #livegigphotography #eventphotography #eventphotographer #eventphoto 60/365 PS: by God, I love this business! Need to find a way to do larger, better things.

A post shared by SG (@altsaurabh) on Feb 29, 2020 at 9:38am PST

He did a Sufi music set and while I could not understand a lot of it, I could see the amount of hard work and dedication it would have taken him and his team! They performed in Hindi, Urdu and some more languages that I could not place. I am guessing Arabic. But I would never know.

The point is, while I was there and even though I could not understand what he was saying with his songs, for once I realized that music does transcend boundaries. Not everyone may understand the sounds and sights and the voices and the narratives but the music allows you to communicate without words. When they were performing, they had their eyes closed in prayer, their heads were covered, the hands folded and all of them were barefoot.

There is this reason that they seemed to be chasing with their songs. There was this orchestrated rhythm to what they were doing. They were not merely performing, they were in this zone where they were meditating. There was this deliberate practice that shined through their songs. In their singing, there was this reverence that you typically reserve for kings, or Gods or both.

And why not? A lot of Sufi music emerged where these singers and preachers and practitioners will sing songs of kindness, forgiveness, and praise for God. The songs talk about how the almighty is kind, gracious, caring, forgiving and more. And often they would compare their kings to God! If I could use a Hindi (or is it Urdu?) word, the songs are meant to shower tareef on their beneficiaries. Both, spiritual (God) and financial (King). 

If I could decode the songs and the meanings, I would probably find the connection! 

In fact, one of the crew members from backstage told me that ARR does a recitation of Namaaz every time he goes up on stage. I am not sure if this is correct. But may I say that I am inclined to believe? It sounds like truth. After all, there is so much feeling of peace that, sort of, dawns upon him (and the audience) when he is singing! 

Thing is, I love these traditions. These norms of how they'd work together. They add meaning to what you are doing. The traditions also help create this bond between everyone that is a part of the entourage. You know, the backup singers, the musicians, the technicians, the support staff and more. After all from what I can estimate, it would have taken more than 500 professionals to make ARR sound like God! 

Traditions help instill discipline. Traditions help navigate the unknown. Traditions help ease the new ones into the fold. Traditions help the old ones grow taller in stature. Traditions is what separates great from good from average to poor. 

And why not? After all their music, their work is a thing that is bigger than them. Their work, their songs give words to prayers that everyone else may not have had. Look at me for example. There are so many things that I feel so strongly about and want to say them in so many ways and yet words fail me all the time. To a point that I feel helpless and stifled. I am sure I am not alone, no one else is. The uniqueness of an individual and even thoughts is a myth. I often come across terms and phrases and expressions and ideas and incidents that help me describe things that I can't find the words for. Music, I think does that. It gives a medium to communicate. And just for that one thing - giving others an ability to communicate - is a large enough reason to ensure that music is deliberate, disciplined and follows the norms and traditions. 

I think this is true for all art forms. Music. Painting. Writing. Acting. Even the newer art forms like photography and others. Just that the impact that an AR Rahman and his troupe singing live can have on you is so large, so lasting that so many thoughts strike you with such a velocity that your brain jolts from its perpetual slumber into a whirlwind that can lift you higher and take you farther! 

Oh, and as I end this, lessons for me? Well, two. 

a, Need to add deliberateness to what I do. This is also what Shanta Gokhale Maam told us at unBlock105. Read more about it here. She said that every line, every sentence that you write must be a deliberate act. Something that you are conscious of. Something that you know you are working on. Each attempt at writing has to like your riyaz, your sadhana, your deliberate practice that you do NOT miss for anything. 

I need to think hard about it and do it. 

b, Need to create traditions in how I work. If I am writing, I need to find a way to start with something that allows gets in the flow. If I am going to talk to people, I need to remind that I need to be kind when I talk to them. If I am thinking of a thing, I need to first take a deep breath before I start. Of course, all these are examples. But I do hope that you get the drift. 

With this, over and out. 

Do consider attending one of AR Rahman's concerts. It could be life-changing! 

#untitled - 160220. This too shall pass.

Its been a while since I wrote an untitled piece (the last one was in Nov last year). Thing is, there's way too much going on in my head and I don't know who to talk to and thus this post. Super ranty. Read at peril. Ignore if you can. And why am I writing? Clear my head. Archive my thoughts. Throw my intent in the universe. 

So, this is one of those days when I have a mile-long list of things to do and almost no energy to get any of those done. I mean I have all the energy of a child to move around, walk fast, talk faster, think faster than all of the above. But I don't have the energy to open my Asana and start knocking off things from it. You know, there's way too much work to even think about working.
Guess you know the feeling.
Or may be not.
Anyhow.
The point is, I have a lot to do and no energy. And I can't seem to find it. I don't know why. I get inspired by the largeness of ideas, the awesomeness of people and opportunities that are so much in abundance. And I know that I am at an amazing place and the timing is amazing and I have the will and inclination and all that. And yet, for some reason, I am poor and stuck. Stuck as in I am still a nobody. Stuck as in I still have limited capital. Stuck as in I don't know how to break the shackles of helplessness. I feel that life is moving past and I am stuck at an obscure corner, with no ride to ride on. Ride to ride on. Lol. 
You know, FOMO!
I know I shouldn't but I am afraid. Of missing out.
And I know its a fleeting feeling and this too shall pass.

If there is a trough, this is the deepest ever I've been. And while I know that this too shall pass and I will eventually come out of it, this feeling of getting stuck is not cool. And not cool is this feeling of helplessness. I don't know what to do to get out of this.
And I am fucking up at multiple levels.
What multiple? All levels.
Everything that you use to measure your life, I am fucking up!

I want to eat healthy.
I was supposed to be on this vegan and sattvic diet - I subscribed and all despite it being an expensive idea - but I am unable to keep my hands out of large plates of food. I am eating like a dude who's just come out of famine. May be, in my head, subconsciously, I am staring at impending starvation and thus eating all that it can lay its hands on?

I am supposed to meditate.
I try and sit down every day but I am unable to concentrate. With all the bells and whistles that I can manage (you know, an app, silent and cold room, etc). And yet, I can hardly concentrate.
This post that I am writing right now, I have this window open for more than half an hour and I have typed less than 200 words. And I have posted a photo on Instagram, opened numerous WhatsApp conversations with people that don't really care if I have a conversation with them or not, replied to a few emails and judged these three kids at the Starbucks where I am sitting. Why Starbucks? Because I can't seem to sit at home. I need to make a den for myself that is me. And no one else. And with the kind of money I have, it is impossible to have a den per se. A roof is a luxury. And I have just grabbed water and all that from the bar. 
All in the last 30 mins. If I could concentrate, I could change the world, you know! Remember that thing about the dude asking for a lever long enough?

I am supposed to get fitter.
I know that I need to start yoga, go for a run, climb 100 flights a day and do other such things. I am unable to do even one of those. Of course, these are merely tiny steps that I need to take to be able to reach my ultimate goal - climb the Mt. Everest and run a marathon. But I am not fucking taking those steps. I don't know why I am unable to.

I am not being a great contributor to the community. Or my family. Or my people.
They need emotional, financial and life advice and I don't have what it takes to give any to any. I've always imagined myself to be that strong pillar that allows everyone around to take shelter. Ok, shelter is not the word - support is more like it. But I see myself as a pillar that supports and enables people to climb higher. But here I am, leaning against nothing but wind!

Things are not that bad, to be honest. May be they are - since I am talking about myself, maybe I am biased?
I do know I am not doing well. Except for putting up the facade when I meet others. And they may seem very well be if you look at em from the perspective of those that look up to me (if there are any). But on the standalone, unbiased basis, they are not. I need a fucking intervention. I don't know which one. Devine? Medical? Spiritual? Don't know.

I am lucky to have the option to live my life in a way I would love to - I am mostly the master of my time, my office is at a walking distance from home, a tiffin service delivers food (and that ensures that I don't have to think about what to eat), there is a maid that knows what to do. Everything is on autopilot. But I am struggling with work and I haven't been able to crack this piece - mostly a result of my inability to generate new business. And like all similar things, it's a vicious circle - I need money to invest so that I can generate business. And the business thus generated would throw more money at me to invest in more people, processes, and things that allow me to generate more business. You know what I am saying?

I need to create opportunities - work and otherwise and I am unable to make any headway with that. There are other business things that I am a part of that could start moving fast and give me access to work. But I am stuck because the ones that are supposed to lead those things have other priorities. Of course, I am to blame. I have entrusted my life with them and if they have other things happening, I need to move ahead. No?

Ok, Eureka!

Thing is, as I was writing this, something occurred to me. This is why I love writing - answers often dawn upon you; plus this is a great way to emulate conversations with others and I think the best when I am talking to others. 

So, what if I am merely drowning in the pool of misery that I have imposed on myself? In the sense that I can see the effects of my inability to get work (less money, stress, inability to support others, etc). But I am not seeing the cause. I have been reliant on others for far too long. What if I take things in my own hands? I become that person that drives things. That makes things happen. That pushes around? Moves the blocks till I find an answer!

Plus, if I reflect on the last few days, I've had a very erratic schedule - I am sleeping at odd hours, doing things that were not planned and taking way too many breaks. I can blame those on all the meetings that require me to criss-cross the city. But then those are part and parcel of life. Irrespective of the time I sleep, I can at least wake up at 5:30 every day and reach work at 6:30! How tough could it be?

Let's do it. Starting tomorrow. Irrespective of what time I sleep tonight. Will set alarm once I have finished writing this piece. No, I am not picking my phone up unless I finish this piece. I did! I could not concentrate. :( 

And finally, if I try and review things that I have planned to do in a certain day, week, month, etc, I often miss those goals (which is ok - I often have stretch goals and I like the idea of impossible challenges) but I don't even revisit the ones that I miss and I don't lament over those. I don't obsess over the fact that nothing is moving. If others can't, I need to be able to move those. Even if its a pendulum motion where I go back to the center after all the hard work, I need to get things moving. I know, I know. The direction is more important than speed. But right now, I am standing still. I am not creating opportunities. I need to do that! I will have to simply work harder than I have ever worked in the past and create more opportunities. It's ok if I am 37. I can still work hard. Like I said at the beginning of the rant, I am full of energy. Lemme put it to good use!

And with this, over and out! Thank you for listening, reading, etc, etc.

Film Review - Parasite (by Bong Joon Ho)

So, last night, I saw Parasite. You know, the movie that the entire world has been going ga ga about? from Cannes to LA to backroads of Versova to online dating forums and beyond!

The film opens on a family of four, the Kims, living in abject poverty (in a basement at the end of a street where drunkards routinely come and puke and piss) and have no hopes or plans for the future. Their phones have been disconnected because they've not paid the bills. And because they don't have phones, they can't get work (after all prospective employers would call you to hire you).

Life looks bleak when suddenly they get this stone that is supposed to bring them prosperity. And true to the charm, it does! Their life changes when the son fakes a degree to get hired as an English home tutor to the daughter of a technology tycoon, Park. From there on, with access to some money, thanks to the son, they start dreaming of a better future and a better life!

Once the son is settled in at a tutor at the Parks, he puts in motion a chain of events that changes the lives of each character in the film - there are 10 key ones (the Kims, the Parks, and the housekeeper).

There is a LOT more to the film than just this. I've not even scratched the surface. But revealing anything more would mean taking away from the experience of watching the film. So, I'd let it go. It's a pity that I cant write a lot about the film without revealing the plot! The thing is, when I write reviews, I try and reveal only as much as the director has chosen to in the official trailer of the film. 

So, what worked for me?
1. Great story
This is one of those stories I wish I had written! There were way too many twists and turns and surprises that I was on the edge. Constantly. The first half dragged a bit but the story did hold my attention. Repeat. Story. Not the film. As a writer, I was interested in knowing what would happen next.

The storytelling is subtle. Unlike other stories, where they tell you things, in this one, you discover things. For example, you realize that Kims are not the most honest people when they fake a degree to get the son a job. But the story plants the seeds when they do a small gig and try to con the employer to give them more money than they deserved!

The storytelling is layered. For each thing they communicate in the story, there is a deeper meaning which is often left unanswered, unexplored for the audience to derive the meaning out of.

2. The art
The house, uff!
I want to live in that house! It has everything that I love - a large space with high ceilings, minimal, spacious, modern, lot of wood, a patch of garden, airy windows, a secret chamber in the basement, diffused, automated lights, art and what not!

Apart from the house, the basement, the gym and other places that they've used in the film, they are brilliant. You want to immerse yourself in that world. You want to see more of those and yet you only get the glimpses. And that's probably the biggest secret of them all - less is more!

3. Faux philosophy
At multiple points in the narrative and the story, multiple characters use their versions of life philosophy to justify things happening around them. And each dialogue could take the shape you want to mold it in. You can scoff at those. You can like those. You can nod at those. You can laugh and dismiss those. All al the same time!

4. The symbolism
The name, Parasite, itself is such a brilliant tool to tell me what to expect. A parasite takes from others and survives at other's expense. In the world of the film, each character is a parasite of sorts. The rich wife, the successful business, the scheming family, the house help, the guests and people in general. Even the young boy. And it has been showcased so well that you forget that they are individuals. They are what the film is called! Parasites!

5. The contrast between the first and the second half
If I could divide the film into two halves, I'd say the first one is, well, quirky. There are these little schemes that the Kim family plots and plays and executes. There are these little funny incidents that make it a funny, happy movie. And the second, in contrast, is, well melancholy. No, wait. Melancholy is not the word. Its surprising, intimidating, complex. It's unexpected. You are taken down this dark journey that you did not expect when you were seeing the first half. You are half expecting a horror film with ghosts and skeletons luring out from abstract corners of the house. But its nothing like that. It's worse. Better, if I may!

6. The last 10-15 minutes
It is no doubt the best part of the film. It's a force majeure, if I may. It's been shot hauntingly well - you feel the excitement and togetherness and love of the characters (for each other). You also feel the pain and the anguish and despair that they have!

What did not work for me?
1. Lot of open ends. Like A LOT!
When I see a film, I want closure. I want to see each character reach their destiny. Or fail to reach their destiny. I want to see the struggle. I want to know how much they invested and how bad they wanted things. And I want to see a meaty melee where the characters are literally dying to reach where they wish to go!

2. Did not make me invested too much for, for too long
The film failed to give me a reason to stay invested after a certain point in the narrative. And the film takes almost an hour to reach that point. I don't want to write that point here (it will spoil the suspense). See footnote 1. 

That's it.
Just two things. Really. 

Verdict? 
Please do see it. It's a great piece of cinema.
I'd give it 4 stars (on a scale of 5).

Small print?  
Did the film deserve all those awards?
Well, no!

And why not?
Well, a film to me is a story told on the visual medium. And a great story (irrespective of the medium) is supposed to inspire me, inform me, move me, heck, change me as a person! Great performances of great actors do that. When I see a Godfather, it makes me want to be like Don Corleone. I see Dangal and I want to be like Phogat. I see Chak De India, I want to be like Kabir Khan.

Great stories and great films stay with you for your lifetimes. I saw DDLJ when I was a kid and I can not forget, Ja Simran Ja. I saw Uncut Gems recently and I can not get Ratner (Adam Sandler) out of my head. I want to be like him. I want to go all-in on whatever I am doing, live life on the edge, have a mistress that no one knows about and all that. I saw Joker months ago and I want to be like him - you know, not know what I would do if I caught the car I was chasing! I would sing my own song and not tote the line.

If nothing else, the film has to be such a force that it keeps me hooked on the edge of my seat. Like War did. Yeah, the one with Hrithik. That War. There was no story to it and the plot was predictable but it was a visual treat. I had my eyes glued to the screen! I could not NOT see it!

Parasite?
Which character would I want to be? Not sure.
What would I remember? Just the house!
What did I takeaway? 2 hours of great entertainment.
Will I give it an oscar? No!

Truth be told, if the film was not as hyped (because of Palme d'Or and the Academy Award and all the acclaim), I would've come out of the theatre with even more praise! You know I was expecting a LOT more! Like a typical middle-class Indian - always asking for more!

But then, would I watch a Korean Drama if it did not get all this acclaim?
I will not have!
Thanks to the hype I saw it.
That's where I'd leave it.

So yeah, that's that. Do see the film! 

Thanks for reading,
SG

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PS: I do want to talk about a few things but that would mean giving away the plot and the story. What I write hereon assumes that you've seen the film. 

DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT WANT SPOILERS.

So, I've been talking to people about it and because I don't seem to find it worthy of all the acclaim, I am told that I have missed a few things. Here is a list. And my thoughts.

a, I am told it's like Slumdog. And there is this portrayal of the shocking class conflict - the difference between the rich and poor and all that. Remember that rain? The rich use that as an excuse to throw a grand party the next day when the sun is out and the poor are left to fend for their lives with nothing to salvage! They say its a social satire. Well, may be. Not to me. These differences do not shock me at all. I see that routinely. At home, at work, in public places. A Barista at Starbucks just confessed that while they get a tad more respect at a Starbucks, they still are invisible people that are not important for the world at large. And that's the fabric of the very world we live in. Some are more privileged. Some are less. 

b, When Kims barely manage to escape from the house (after the Parks come back when the campsite is flooded), why couldn't they merely disappear? Run away from it all? Why would the Kims come back to the house? All it would take is to switch off their phones and run away. You know, ghost! The Kims anyway don't have much left that they could be attached to!

c, Apparently, in the end, there is this track that has been performed by the actor himself where he discloses that it will take him 500 years to get his father out. Assuming he can't just barge in and get the guy out. Assuming the father can't merely walk-out at the dead of the night and disappear in Korea. Probably I don't understand the Korean police system. I mean it's fairly easy to commit a crime and disappear in India. May be it is not in Korea.

d, After the Parks come back, there are far too many close encounters between them and the Kims. The thing is, there were far too many of those. And there are Kims find it far too easy to escape. It's surprising that the Parks did not find anything amiss in a house where the Kims were making merry into! It's all too easy!

e, I am told that this is a classic Bong Joon Ho film. And no, I have not seen any of his other films. So, I'd let that pass.


Footnotes 
1, Continued from above.
So, when the Kims have finally "taken over" the Park's residence, I could've left the cinema hall. There was nothing left for me to see. That is where you could have ended the story and I would have found closure and moved on. It would be a great enough victory for them - that they were living in a basement and now they sort of control a large house! That could've been their victory. I would've left the hall, if not for that incessant doorbell. The bell took way too long to ring. Could've made this part crisper, shorter, sharper. Oh, but when it did come, I was hooked! I wanted to know what going to come next. And like I said, what came next, blew my head off! 

2, Some of the fan-posters are brilliant. Here's a collection for you to ogle at. Here is my favorite...

Source - Mubi

Announcing 1000 x 1000

So, I had some time to kill in the morning today - I was early for a meeting (to avoid traffic). And while I was whiling away time at a Starbucks, I got reading. And somehow, I stumbled onto this post by one of my favorite twitter users - Visa. 

And I was like, Fuck! I want to do this as well. Of course, it would take commitment and I need to think it through and all that but it would be super cool if I did. No? I don't know if I would have time to do it or not. What about making an announcement and not doing it? What about all the other promises that I have made to people and haven't delivered on those? Where would I get the ideas from? Did I not try this multiple times in the past? What about SoG? What about other things that you were working on? Etc etc.

THF FUCK SAURABH!

Since when you got into this analysis-paralysis? STFU! Do it! 

Yeah yeah. 

Here I am! 

Announcing that I would! 

So, I will publish 1000 posts of at least 1000 words each over the next few years. 

Each post will talk about a thing that I am curious about, a thing that I think needs to be shared widely, a thing that I have an opinion on, a thing that I believe that everyone ought to learn. And more! The idea is 1000 essays of 1000 words. 

And why would I do?

• Well, the "O faaaaaak" went in my head when I read about it
• Plus this is something that I can easily do over the next whatever number of years I have left. Plus I have things to say. And a lot of those at that. And this project looks like a great idea to blurt those out. Visa calls these vomits. I'd say thought streams.
• To be able to write these articles, I will have to read, research, think, talk, ponder, make mistakes and more. Each thing will help me grow as a person. Each thing will help me develop something new! 
• Plus the articles can open more doors for me - serendipity you know. 

And that, ladies and gents, is the big thing for the day. Help me with it, will you? 

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PS: Last night I was talking to a friend about the creative process that artists follow when they create their work. She brought up the Oscars acceptance speech by the director of Parasite and how he mentioned something like creative work is personal. And my friend wanted to know how do I choose things that I work on. Since this is the most recent thing that I am getting excited by, I can try and list the process. 

Here it is. 

I ask myself a few questions. If the answers are overwhelming yes, I do it! Here are the questions... 

• Does the idea make me go "O faaaak"? O Faaak is my way of saying that the idea is so brilliant, so amazing that eyes have popped out from the socket and all that! 
• Is it something that I can humanly do? For example, while I may want to play sports at the professional level, at the age of 37, can I do it? No. But can I write 1000 articles of 1000 words each? YES, I CAN! 
• Is it something that would teach me something new?
• Will it get me more opportunities? 
• Will I be as excited about the idea in 5 years? I often overlook this question but I must use it more often. For this project, I don't think I will be excited about it unless I see some validation/rewards with it. May be a book? I don't know. 

If I get more than three yeses, I do it. Or else I often don't. 

That's it, Princess :)