Day 11.
As I write this, its 10:52. About an hour from the impending deadline for the day. Which is ok. I think I work better when the deadlines are hovering over my head. The point is that I am consciously trying to publish a piece every day. Which, given the life that I lead is next to impossible.
And yet, here I am. Doing it. I agree that most pieces that I write may not qualify as quality content. But like I keep saying, I am the kinds that needs to put in hours and hours before I get some good content that could engage someone for even 4 seconds!
In terms of the day, it was a pretty routine day. Woke up rather late, went for a meeting, had eggs for lunch and dinner. Had 3 Diet Cokes. Made a few phone calls that were pending for sometime. Got some work done. Moved the needle on one of the projects. And of course a lot of other projects are open. So that's something that I need to fix as we go along. Who's we? Main aur meri tanhai. Lol.
Moving on. As I was writing this, I realised that I some travel coming up (Delhi and Kolkatta) in the next few days. Delhi is as early as the next week. And if all goes well, I could be in Chennai as well in the next week. All of this is work. Lets see how that pans out. In case you are in any of these cities and want to catch up, please do lemme know. Who are you kidding Mr. G? Who the F reads your blog?
Ok people may not read the blog. But that does not mean that you will not write. The intent of this 1000 words a day pact is to sharpen the muscle and see the extent to which I can push myself. I keep telling myself that I am very strong willed and this is one sure way of testing that will!
So yeah. That.
And in terms of other updates, a lot hasn't changed since yesterday. I am still the same - happy, sad, excited, scared, careless, cheerful and all that. Bipolar anyone?
Thing is, this pouring of random words on a public medium is an interesting idea. This makes me blurt out things that are clouding my head. And while writing, once I get in the flow, I often write things that I dont even know are fucking with my head. So, this is therapeutic in a way. And this also means that this exposes my vulnerabilities to the world - which is not a great thing. Especially if you have the grandiose ambitions like mine. I am often asked about my plans to reach my ambition and I dont have an answer. In an ideal world, you ought to be doing this blurting out in front of the ones that you know will stand by you. And this is where I suck. People that will stand by me.
This also brings me to the lesson for the day.
So, what did I learn today?
I learnt that no one cares for you. Apart from you, no one is responsible for your success or happiness. No I am not talking about me per se. But about people in general.
How did I learn this?
I was talking to Krishna about the post I made yesterday and I realised that while he wants to help me but he can do only as much. He can give me inputs and talk to me and give me the emotional support that I need but he will not quit what he's doing to stand by my side! Will I stand by his side? Not really. But I will stand by a LOT of people. All of my ex-bosses for example. They've given me long leashes and if anyone is in trouble, I will do whatever it takes to fix things for them. Even if I cant fix things, I will ensure that I try hard.
That.
I dont have one person like that. I have great friends and others that are invested in my success but I really need people who make me their number one priority. Or a cabal where we are a clique and everyone is taken care of and does well and stands by each other. You know what I am saying? Guess this TED talk by Derek could help? Or may be its only about creating reputation for yourself? May be. May be not. Time shall tell.
And till tomorrow, this is over and out!
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